When a man gets married he is suppose to cling to his wife. Gen.2:24

The idea is for the two of you to become one. It's pretty simple in concept.

 

To me family is anyone that I have currently in my circle of trust. Be it blood relative, in-law, or close friends.

Every once in a while the circle widens and sometimes it is quite small.

 

When a man gets married he is suppose to clog to his wife. Gen.2:24

The idea is for the two of you to become one. It's pretty simple in concept.[/QUOTE]

You would think.

 

:donut:

What vicker said.

:donut:

 

Speaking for me only. This is what my order of importance would be/is

My faith
My wife
My wife & kids
Then "extended" family

Leave and cleave, let no man put us under.



Owl

 

To me family is anyone that I have currently in my circle of trust. Be it blood relative, in-law, or close friends.

Every once in a while the circle widens and sometimes it is quite small.

Never thought of that when I first posted, but I think you're right.
I have to bring this to a conclusion,,and I don't know how.
Gh

 

When a man gets married he is suppose to clog to his wife. Gen.2:24

The idea is for the two of you to become one. It's pretty simple in concept.

That's true,but all his folks don't cease to exist either. Neither does her's. Funny how much trouble that causes.

 

Never thought of that when I first posted, but I think you're right.
I have to bring this to a conclusion,,and I don't know how.
Gh

Being ex-military, I have also been in squadrons that were considered family.

What is "this"?

 

:donut:

What vicker said.

:donut:

Well, except the "clog" part. hehe!

 

Well, except the "clog" part. hehe!

I had to google it.

24 Therefore shall a aman leave his bfather and his mother, and shall ccleave unto his dwife: and they shall be eone flesh.

 

Being ex-military, I have also been in squadrons that were considered family.

What is "this"?[/QUOTE]

You picked up on that. You're very observant.
This,,, is something I need to discover,, or come to the realization, it may not exist. At least in the concepts of what I think of as family.
Wife/husband/children.
I have friends, a retired couple that have accepted my boys and myself as part of their family. Even tho we have an open invitation to spend every week-end with them on their farm. I just can't bring myself to indulge in their hospitality, out of fear.
I love them as if they were my own parents. I don't want to lose them as friends.

 

Being ex-military, I have also been in squadrons that were considered family.

What is "this"?[/QUOTE]

You picked up on that. You're very observant.
This,,, is something I need to discover,, or come to the realization, it may not exist. At least in the concepts of what I think of as family.
Wife/husband/children.
I have friends, a retired couple that have accepted my boys and myself as part of their family. Even tho we have an open invitation to spend every week-end with them on their farm. I just can't bring myself to indulge in their hospitality, out of fear.
I love them as if they were my own parents. I don't want to lose them as friends.

I worked nukes.... I don't miss much.

I can understand your situation. Retired.... do they hobby farm, ranch, garden? If so, be there when stuff needs done. It is good for the boys.

They also need time to themselves even though weekends don't mean as much after retirement.

Always be respectful, let them know if you are coming out. Ask if they need anything. Let them know when you are NOT coming out so they don't spend money on extra vittles, etc..... or change their plans.

I would try 2 on, 2 off. Then see where it goes.

What part of Kansas?

 

I like Vick's aqnswer; also Lonely Tree's. My "family" (those I trust & cherish) consists of my siblings, my children & grandchildren, and a small circle of close, trusted & beloved friends. . . . AND. . . Jesus!

 

Here's how it's supposed to be:
When a man, marries a woman, he 'leaves and cleaves' (as does she).
She is no longer under the authority of her fathers house, and he is no longer under the authority of his fathers house.
HE (the dh) is now "the man".
He is not controlled manipulated or under the authority of his mommy or dad, AND he does not allow them to meddle in his marriage. Ever.
DITTO for the woman.
He, his wife and their children ALWAYS come first.

Here's how it went down:
For me personally, I have ALWAYS wanted a "big family".
I had delusions of grandeur that being surrounded by people and being hospitable and welcoming that we could be one big family.
Lots of love and joy around the table (like the Waltons).....
Man, was I wrong.

For me today?
My children are my family.
I pray they will marry into a HEALTHY big family, so that they can experience the love of many. I want their lives to be filled with love.

ETA

I have friends, a retired couple that have accepted my boys and myself as part of their family.
Even tho we have an open invitation to spend every week-end with them on their farm.
I just can't bring myself to indulge in their hospitality, out of fear.
I love them as if they were my own parents. I don't want to lose them as friends.

Let them love you. All of you.
Don't wear out your welcome, but go.....go and allow them to love you guys.
Having someone love on you is so good for the soul.

 

Let them love you. All of you.
Don't wear out your welcome, but go.....go and allow them to love you guys.
Having someone love on you is so good for the soul.

so this!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Tour wife and children come first, but don't neglect the rest of your family.there's no substitute for a strong family, if you keep God close in your family it will be blessed. The family that prays together stays together. Just my two cents. God bless

 

From my point of view, which is somewhat ethnic in origin, but also has a few twists thrown in by personal experience - one's family grows with marriage even though the focus of responsibility changes: When one gets married, their primary responsibility becomes their spouse and kids. Responsibility to the greater family, which now includes the spouse's greater family as well still exists, but becomes secondary.

I have a very large extended family, that is spread out across half the country and in two other countries as well. I have 3rd cousins that are good friends, but 1st cousins I've never actually met. Exactly what is my responsibility toward these cousins? It isn't exactly codified, but it's more or less an expectation of 'welcome' and 'friendship'. For example, when I was in the Navy, I reported to a new ship and one of the guys in the personnel office had a familiar last name, so I asked him where he was from. He thought my last name was familiar too, so we compared notes, and it turned out we were second cousins. Even though neither of us had ever personally met the other's parents and had only vague recollections of each others' granparents, we were 'family'. We had each other and our respective wives over for dinner, we occasionally hung out together on port calls, etc. That's about as well as I can explain it - sort of a presumption of friendship.

 

When a man gets married he is suppose to cling to his wife. Gen.2:24

The idea is for the two of you to become one. It's pretty simple in concept.

Exactly, you nailed it.

 

Immediate Family:
Married = Spouse and any children
Single = Parents and siblings

However, the word family can mean blood relation or not; it is those with whom you are close or love and depend on as your would a family.

 

What constitutes a family can only be defined by it's members.

 

Marsh
A family is not just connected by blood. A family is a group of two or more people who are connected in some fashion by the same ideals, religion, love, etc. Family is defined in my life by who I allow into my life.

Some blood relatives are worse than the plague - lol..so they are not in my "family" circle. I have friends that I consider "family". I have kids that I treated like my own kids while I was boarding horses and taught riding lessons..those kids were at my house 7 days a week for years on end as they showed, rode, cleaned the barn, did homework, etc.

I guess family are those people that you care for, love, protect, respect, and want to be with. And sometimes that means they are not blood relatives.

 

:donut:

I saw the clog, vicker, and still fully embraced your message.

:donut:

 

Well,,,you all helped me understand that family doesn't always have to be blood.
It can also be friends, etc.
I'm working on that
This couple that has accepted myself and my boy's into their family are one in a million. A pure unadulterated heart of gold. Have been invited to their house for the last 6 years for thanksgiving, and have gone every other year. I don't want to interfere with their immediate family, "2 daughters"/husbands and kids.
The problem is me.
What Vick stated is what I lived when married.
The wife,,, not so much. Her family was more important than the family I assumed we were creating.
So anyway,,,because of the responses, I'll try to allow myself to become a part of someone elses family.
But,, I don't think I can ever totally retire of making an attempt to give my sons an example of what constitutes a husband/wife relationship.
I;ve heard it stated many atime, that you first have to make yourself happy before you can make someone else happy.
I don't follow that line of thought. Basically,, because I can't.
If I were married,, I'm not happy unless I can put a smile on her face of a mornin.
I've always been that way,, and I can't change who and what I am.
GH

 

There is nobody I consider family from me downward. My family coinsist of my kids, My X and her sisters, and there families.

 

I have my own ideas about family. For me family consists of a few decent kinfolk... and a large number of very close friends. Controlling, manipulative kinfolk are "disowned", and I have as little to do with them as possible. My Yvonne's parents, and her sister and hubby, my own father, several of the my step children and a couple of the grandkids are family... two brothers and their wives, a biological mother, some of the step kids have been put on the other list long ago. Lots of friends though... we always have wonderful family gatherings for holidays and special events.