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Need suggestions for waking up teenager

2.7K views 59 replies 51 participants last post by  watcher  
#1 ·
Hi! I am not really new here, but haven't posted much, but I have a problem that is puzzling me, and I was wondering if any of you great folks out there might have some suggestions/advice.

My son is 15 and is a VERY sound sleeper, has been since almost day 1 of life. It is so difficult to wake him for school in the mornings and I am almost at my wits end trying to accomplish this. Alarm clock(s) do not work, water does not work, shouting/banging , gentle touches, talking, removing covers, shaking bed, etc. do not work. It has gotten to the point that we are both mad by the time he gets out of bed :flame:

There has got to be a better way to do this!! Do you have any ideas?

Thank you!
 
#2 ·
Why should he worry about getting up? You do all the work!

Tell him that from this day forth he is responsible for getting up. Provide an alarm clock---across the room, that is preferable. Make it loud.

Remind him that it is his job to pass school, make the bus, etc.

Call him once if you absolutely can't stand it.

Let him be late to school.
Let him sleep thru stuff he wants to do on the weekends.
Make him stay home to do makeup work he misses 'cause he slept in.

Pretty soon he'll haul his hiney out of the rack.
 
#5 ·
BTDT-
a cold, wet washcloth to the face WILL wake him
he will be mad, but he will be awake
then you can calmly and gently (or not) explain that he needs to arise, oh sweet child...

but after a few experiences with the washcloth, the sound of water running in the bathroom will get him out of bed.

good luck
 
#6 ·
My step-son (age 18 at the time) was always slow to get up. One morning, the second time I went to his door, I simply said: "Please be in your bed when I get back." By the time I started filling the glass with crushed ice, he was up and getting dressed (he knew me well enough to know that I never bluff) Never had that problem again.
 
#7 ·
KatieTx said:
Hi! I am not really new here, but haven't posted much, but I have a problem that is puzzling me, and I was wondering if any of you great folks out there might have some suggestions/advice.

My son is 15 and is a VERY sound sleeper, has been since almost day 1 of life. It is so difficult to wake him for school in the mornings and I am almost at my wits end trying to accomplish this. Alarm clock(s) do not work, water does not work, shouting/banging , gentle touches, talking, removing covers, shaking bed, etc. do not work. It has gotten to the point that we are both mad by the time he gets out of bed :flame:

There has got to be a better way to do this!! Do you have any ideas?

Thank you!
Is he literally not waking up? or is he awake and just won't get up?

Megan has a hard time waking up with an alarm. She says it just doesn't enter her conscious thought that when she hears that alarm she has to wake up. We put it across the room and she will get up and shut it off and go back to sleep, not even remembering that she got up! But if I wake her up personally she is wide awake. She says she knows that if she hears my voice she really has to get up.

I don't agree with dumping cold water or ice on anyone, just seems very mean and disrespectful. I would not like anyone to do that to me! He may need to get to bed much earlier, he may need time to lay in bed awake and just adjust himself to the idea of waking up.
 
#8 ·
I would make sure he gets to bed earlier. Enforce an earlier bedtime - say an hour or two earlier than he's been getting. He'll be more ready to wake up at the set time. Once he's getting the right amount of sleep, I agree with the alarm clock camp - he's old enough to be responsible for that himself, with only an occasional reminder from mom.
 
#9 ·
KatieTx said:
Hi! I am not really new here, but haven't posted much, but I have a problem that is puzzling me, and I was wondering if any of you great folks out there might have some suggestions/advice.

My son is 15 and is a VERY sound sleeper, has been since almost day 1 of life. It is so difficult to wake him for school in the mornings and I am almost at my wits end trying to accomplish this. Alarm clock(s) do not work, water does not work, shouting/banging , gentle touches, talking, removing covers, shaking bed, etc. do not work. It has gotten to the point that we are both mad by the time he gets out of bed :flame:

There has got to be a better way to do this!! Do you have any ideas?

Thank you!
Oh dear. It sounds like your son might have Delayed Sleep Phase Syndrome! I've had it all my life and it's MISERABLE. Is he a night owl by nature?

DSPS results from an over production of Serotonin in the body. You might try having him cut down on eating carbohydrates in the evening as this has shown to reduce serotonin levels.

Like I said, I have been battling this for more than 50 years and I still have not found anything that really works well. I could say "let him have his own schedule" but sadly, this does not usually coincide with the rest of the world. Researchers have had some success with natural lithium as a dietary supplement, but it didn't do squat for me.

donsgal
 
#11 ·
mamalisa said:
Why should he worry about getting up? You do all the work!

Tell him that from this day forth he is responsible for getting up. Provide an alarm clock---across the room, that is preferable. Make it loud.

Remind him that it is his job to pass school, make the bus, etc.

Call him once if you absolutely can't stand it.

Let him be late to school.
Let him sleep thru stuff he wants to do on the weekends.
Make him stay home to do makeup work he misses 'cause he slept in.

Pretty soon he'll haul his hiney out of the rack.
mamalisa speaks with wisdom on this. After years of waking up teenagers repeatedly we did just what she describes with great success. It took about a week of missing the bus and falling behind for them to figure out how to get their act together. We also made it clear that if they couldn't make it to school they most certainly couldn't partake in fun activities.

First take a good look at what is going on and make sure that there are not medical reasons as the cause. If there are reasons that the kids is staying up too late like late night TV, video games or internet remove those thing from his room.
 
#13 ·
mamalisa speaks with wisdom on this.
Ok, we have already tried this with him. How long do i let the staying home thing go on? That is not a punishment, to miss school. I am not sure how it is in your school district, but here students can only miss x amount of days before they loose credit and the parents receive a citation/truancy fine. I do agree with teenagers being responsible, we are currently dealing with that issue :baby04: He and my other DS, 16 are currently having to ride the bus, instead of taking their truck, because they got caught tossing trash onto the side of the road. Regardless, he is still hard to wake up even on the weekends.

This is not a new behaviour for him, he has always been an extremely hard sleeper. He can get up, turn off the alarm, and never realize that he was awake in the first place. There are some great ideas here, I may take him to be checked out, to make sure there is no physical reason for his sleeping like a log!

Thanks all for the great ideas and discussion! I appreciate it :)
 
#14 ·
deaconjim said:
My step-son (age 18 at the time) was always slow to get up. One morning, the second time I went to his door, I simply said: "Please be in your bed when I get back." By the time I started filling the glass with crushed ice, he was up and getting dressed (he knew me well enough to know that I never bluff) Never had that problem again.
Love this one.....puts it right in their lap..... :)
 
#15 ·
My brother had a problem getting up for school. He plead innocent. Claimed he was just that way...BUT in fact he would either 1)sneak out and tie one on at night or 2)stay up all night reading trashy novels. The ice water did the trick.

I'm not saying OP's DS is doing this...but plenty of kids do. And I agree, missing school is a TREAT, not a punishment.
 
#16 ·
This is an absolutely true story about someone who was a sound sleeper...
When I was in college 35 years ago, the fellow who lived in the room next to me (in the dorm) was such a sound sleeper, that he set two alarm clocks and they would both go off, and his mother would phone him from home every morning, and the phone would ring sometimes as many as two hundred times before he would wake up. We were in the same fraternity, and of course back then, no one slept with their doors locked, so one day this big guy named Scott, went into Steve"s(the sound sleeper) room. Scott grabbed a frat paddle and jumped up in the air and came down and hit Steve on the butt with the paddle with all his might. Steve woke up about 40 minutes later complaining that his @$$ hurt!
I was there when it happened, and will swear on a stack of Bibles that it is true!
 
#17 ·
Does he get up when he has something fun to do? My middle child sleep very sound, but can be up and ready if they're is something she wants to do.
I was so tried of fight with her to get up. I told her she was to be ready to leave at 7:00 if she wasn't in the truck she was left. I would then call the school and let them know to send out the truant office to get her. She was never late again. G&S
 
#18 ·
But if he misses school, what is he doing?

Mine, if they miss school, shovel manure, houseclean, move the woodpile---usually about 15 feet, just too far to throw the wood----all those crummy jobs you really don't want to do!

And if he looses credit, he repeats the whatever grade! This is NOT your responsibility, it is his. Who will wake him up the rest of his life?
 
#19 ·
mamalisa said:
Why should he worry about getting up? You do all the work!

Tell him that from this day forth he is responsible for getting up. Provide an alarm clock---across the room, that is preferable. Make it loud.

Remind him that it is his job to pass school, make the bus, etc.

Call him once if you absolutely can't stand it.

Let him be late to school.
Let him sleep thru stuff he wants to do on the weekends.
Make him stay home to do makeup work he misses 'cause he slept in.

Pretty soon he'll haul his hiney out of the rack.
Not necessarily. My son was that way, and he just ended up dropping out of school. BTW, he got his GED, went on to college, and now has a very good job as a senior systems engineer (computer geek) for an international firm.
 
#21 ·
Try a taser, that'll work, guaranteed. (Okay, some of you anal retentive people out there, before you go ballistic, I'm just joking).


.
 
#22 ·
Could you put a clock radio across the room, tuned to a polka station or set up to play a polka CD?

When I was in high school, my clock radio was tuned to a horrible country western show hosted by Ray Hudson (of Ray Hudson And The Western Rhythmaires). The radio never stayed on very long.
 
#23 ·
mamalisa absolutely IS correct...if it is defiant in nature and not a physical problem.

To condense from other posters:

-Make sure he is getting to bed at a reasonable time. (Mine are only permitted to make their own schedule if they meet all other responsibilities. Grades fall or chores get behind, we go back to I say when they go to bed. They have to earn their privilege of more autonomy.)

-Make sure he is not eating or drinking inappropriate things after dinner, like caffeinated drinks or foods of any sort.

-Make sure he does not have any physical problems that prevent him getting a good night's sleep

-If he checks out physically, his problem is defiant in nature. It IS his responsibilty to get to school on time, etc. If it were me, I would notify the school of what's going on so they can (hopefully) get behind you and not punish you since you are trying to help him and not being irresponsible. They may even have some helpful tips.
 
#25 ·
I was like this, and still am. I have two alarm clocks, across the room, going off every 6 mintues for one, every nine mintues for the other, and they are set for an hour and half before I have to get out of bed. *I just don't hear them!!* My poor DH dosn't stand a chance but luckily he learned to deal with it, and now he dont' hear them either!! I have to repeat before I go to bed *must wake up at this time* *must wake up at this time* or I would never make it anywhere. And if I have the day off, and DH don't, guarantee he will be late for work since my mind *knows* that I dont' have to get up, and therefore I dont' wake him up.

My advice, is let it be his problem. My mom, bless her heart, always would come in every 10 mintues, try to snuggle, "time to wake up" . . . 10 minutes later same thing. I finally told her to leave me alone, and made it my problem, and it got easier (on me, I think I hurt her feelings . . .). Yeah, I was late a few times, still am once in a while, but I learned to cope while it didn't matter (ie school, where I could drive myself later) then at a job, where I would of been fired.