whining again

Discussion in 'Homesteading Questions' started by Jena, May 29, 2004.

  1. Jena

    Jena Well-Known Member

    Aug 13, 2003
    ok, it's been a week and i should be all better now, right???

    my fingers don't hurt as bad anymore, but my whole hand/arm has decided to take over. when my hand went through the pulley, it yanked my hand into an unnatural angle. my wrist, elbow and shoulder are still protesting. all the tendons and muscles hurt and ache. it sounds so good to be able to soak the whole thing in a hot bath, but i can't because of the stitches in my fingers.

    i have only been out to farm once briefly this week. i know that if i go to "just do this" i will end up doing a whole lot of other stuff and make matters worse. my husband has told me i am not allowed out there at all and i know he's right. i often don't agree with my husband's methods of taking care of things, but i can't really argue when he's doing all my work. every night i have bad dreams about dying animals.

    so i sit and watch tv all day, eat, take naps, eat,get onth computer, eat, nap and did i mention eating? it's driving me crazy, but when i do go out for a bit, i get worn out really fast. i've experienced this after surgery before, but didn't think a couple mashed fingers could make me so tired. i feel like a schmucky loser.

    i go to the doctor tuesday and hopefully the skin graft on the end of my finger has taken well. he really stressed to me how i had to keep that area undisturbed to let it graft and i hope i have done well by it. once that part is healed, i won't worry so much about it. the stitches where he took the skin for the graft itch like crazy.

    my brain keeps telling me that my fingers are curled up, like in a fist. i can look at them and see them laying there, flat, but the nerves don't want to believe my eyes...they say it is curled. i hope that goes away soon.

    somehow i got the impression that i would be back to normal, other than a sore hand, within a short amount of time. i don't know if i'm a big baby, but i'm far from normal. my ex cut a couple fingers with a table saw and was fine within a week. i keep telling myself there's a big difference between cutting your fingers cleanly and basically mashing parts of them off.

    my kid has to open my child-proof pill bottles, my daughter has to put my hair up and fasten my bra for me. she also did the grocery shopping today. i can't drive my stick shifts.

    but....i am alive, i will get better and i still have a hand. after looking at the pulley again, i was lucky that my wrist did not get sliced on a piece of metal that sticks out above it. i very well could have been in serious trouble then.

    there's lots to be grateful for and lots to whine about all at once. guess i'll just go eat some more and take a nap.

  2. agmantoo

    agmantoo agmantoo Supporter

    May 22, 2003
    Zone 7
    Jena, a week is not long enough for a recovery. As I mentioned, I too experienced a hand mangle. Unfortunately, the hand will never be the same but it will be useable. One of my fingers has the curl you mentioned and it is most annoying. To be able to straighten the finger would at times give the greatest of sensations. For me it is not going to happen so I adjust to knowing that and knowing that I can cup my hand and when receiving change from a purchase or when shaking hands it is less obvious than not having the finger. For that, I am thankful. My other finger that has a fused joint gives little problem but it required a followup operation. As mentioned previously, we humans are very adaptable and given time adjust. You have lived a lifetime until last week with an intact fully functional hand. A week is a short time to adjust to the change. Be patient and you will be fine. Wishing you a speedy recovery!

  3. dale anne

    dale anne Well-Known Member

    Apr 28, 2004
    sleeping and eating...signs of being bored or could be meds.....take advantage of yer down time while keeping yerself busy...put together a puzzel with yer youngins....teach yer daughter how to make bread...play board games......make a poster project from dry beans....pintos are planted in the months of ???....let child answer....pole beans are planted in the month of ?????.....can also go to the movie rental store and get free vidoes about what to do when a stranger approaches achild....about how to say no to drugs...sex...so on many topics...watch it with yer children and then have a family talk about it afterwards....also agood time to teach children householdchores or how the kitchen is laid out so that cooking utensils are kept near the stove.....dry foods in cabinets away from stove and sink.....so on....I did alot of these things when i blew out both knees in an accident and had 6 months down!....my son learned alot in a very short amount of time....alos got to help him study fer school test more often and seen a huge improvment in his grades...I know school is out fer most now...but can always teach a child spelling or math[how to balance a check book]...good luck and keep yer head up.....i believe that things happen good or bad for a reason.....maybe it's time ya need to slow down fer a bit and allow hubby to do things...might just find he is more dependable then ya first thought....now i know he can never do as good a job as ya can....i feel the same way about my Michael...well cant say not as good....will say just not the same ...might bring ya closer together by him picking up the slack now he gets to see just how much work ya do......good luck...dale anne
  4. fordy

    fordy Well-Known Member

    Sep 13, 2003
    Whiskey Flats(Ft. Worth) , Tx
    ................We, All want you TOO get Well, Jena. My suggestion to help your recovery would be to, Think of every individual whom you don't really care for in your general Area, then Visualize yourself driving thru town or by their house and you casually Toot your Horn , Then Give them the ONE finger salute. Ah, you'll see that Manual Dexterity return in short order. In fact, you can practice Giving the "Finger" too every creature you ever had a disagreement with, except your husband. ...........fordy..... :eek: ;) :p
  5. Sarah J

    Sarah J Well-Known Member

    Jun 28, 2003
    Southeast Iowa
    Your body is trying to recouperate. It takes a lot of energy to heal a hand (or anything else, for that matter). I spent over a month trying to get my hand back up to par...and it took more than 6 months. And that was a simply PUNCTURE wound...granted it was infected, but still... Antibiotics can drop you like a rock. Pain killers can drop you like a rock. Simply waiting for your body to heal itself can drop you like a rock.

    It seems so hard and you feel so helpless. It's "sort of" great for the first day or two as everyone gives you all this attention but there are SO MANY things that you simply can't do...you don't realize how many things require two hands until you're down to one. You start to feel useless, restless and want to do things and know you can't. It's depressing and humiliating asking for help, or being TOLD you can't do something that you've done your whole life, as if you're a child.

    But the recouperation will take a LONG time. You'll start to feel better in another few days to a week. Your energy will return. But the full healing takes a lot of time and it may not ever fully heal, given what it's been through. It's hard. But try not to be too hard on yourself for being tired or bored or depressed. That's completely normal and it will pass if you allow it to. Take charge of the healing process. Eat the right foods (BLUEBERRIES!!!) to aid in the healing. Rest when your body tells you to rest. Accept the help that is offered and don't be afraid to ask for help when you need it.

    You'll be okay. I just know it. You can get through this!

  6. Bink

    Bink Well-Known Member

    Apr 13, 2003
    Beautiful Kentucky
    I hardly think you're whining, Jena. I think that some depression and grieving after a serious accident like that is normal. Hang in there, it will pass.
  7. frontiergal

    frontiergal Well-Known Member

    Oct 3, 2002
    Washington State
    Sometimes we expect more from ourselves than is possible. I separated my shoulder a month and a half ago and still do not have full use of it. I can pretty much brush my hair again and can wash dishes but if I use it to much I get really sore.
    I'm not sure how long it will take before it is 100 % but I try to take it slow when I catch myself overworking. You have been through alot and need to let not only your body heal but also your mind. Injuries like yours can take alot out of you.
    Slow and steady, I found that if I took it easy I didn't reinjure myself and started to heal quicker. God Bless you. Heidi
  8. Jena - It does take longer for a mashed hand to heal my Daughter-in-laws brother got his hand caught in a machine at work when they were tryting to unjam it and the operator turned it back on without telling him he lost the ends of three fingers one down to the knuckle if he hadn't heard the click and tried to yank his hand clear it would probably have been his whole hand that got mashed. It took about three weeks before he started feeling much better and he didn't get his arm yanked like you did. Give yourself some time and don't feel like you're been a whimp for laying around take it from some one who has never been good at following DR's orders trying to do too much too soon will only slow down your recovery.

  9. Try thinking about this. Sometime in your life, past or present or future, there have been people who needed you. You may have helped without knowing you did. Good spirits follow good deeds and are there when you need them. It works in a circle-the more good spirits that you emit the better chance you have of recieving some when you need them. Somewhere, somehow -probably in more ways than one- you were a good spirit to someone in need. Now, you are the one in need. You should take the help, and don't feel bad about it. You don't like the way dh does things and thats ok. You feel frustrated and sore and want to get up and moving and thats normal. You can't expect yourself to "just get over it". Don't beat yourself up for not being a super woman with the power of instant healing. It just doesnt exist. If youre wanting to sit and eat, then do what the above poster suggested, eat healing foods. Spend time with family, and make sure the kids understand now more than ever about being carefull around machines. You'll be back up and moving sooner than you think. And for the sore muscles, a heating pad does wonders.

  10. Homesteader

    Homesteader Well-Known Member

    Jul 13, 2002
    Desert of So. NV
    Hang in there. No you should not be recovered yet. Period. Don't be so hard on yourself - it's all going to take time and it'll be okay. I had surgery done on both hands at the same time, had no use of either, try that one on for size! Do of course have all fingers so I can't even imagine....but I do know you just need to relax, take it easy, take all the help and come here often for more moral support.
  11. tallpines

    tallpines Well-Known Member

    Apr 9, 2003
    A woods in Wisconsin
    I've been thinking about you, Jena.
    Wishing you a speedy recovery.
  12. Blu3duk

    Blu3duk Well-Known Member

    Jun 2, 2002
    central idaho republic
    yep you are whinning..... a sign of healing.

    Get an old cd of SRV [Stevie Ray Vaughn] and listen to the austin city blues, and remeber it could have been worse, but it WILL get better. Music helps heal you faster, blues help you feel better anytiem you are down.

    If you are still on anti-biotics, get some Green Tea and drink that with it, helps the body utilize those things.... Put together an image in your head for making things easier for feeding and carrying water...... put the image on paper..... give it to a machine shop and have them manufacture it for you.....

    Typing one handed is the pits..... i do it from time to time when my little ones are in my lap.....except i couldnt doit with the newone yet... he is soooooooo small at 5 days old.

    get better.

  13. TXlightningbug

    TXlightningbug Well-Known Member

    Jan 18, 2004
    Hi, Jena, I'm glad you came back to let us know how you're doing. All of the above posters have great ideas and I strongly urge you to try them out.

    Your nerves are giving you what is called "ghost signals" and they can dry a person nuts. I know mine did. I lost half of a finger to a blood clot. I could still feel the missing part for weeks afterward. It does go away eventually. My personal belief is that it is your soul still extending out the length of the fingers, the curling possibly because you want to be protective of the fingers.

    Whining is part of the healing process, it really is. You have to talk about it and get feedback from others who have been there before you to know that you're not alone and you're not nuts. You're doing good, believe it or not.

    Call your doc's office and ask if it would be allowed for you to double bag your hand with two or more plastic bags and tape it securely to your arm with waterproof tape so you can soak in the tub. If he okays it, be absolutely certain that your DH is there to fish you out. Your knees will be wobbly from the relief. I speak from experience. Otherwise, get that heating pad or hot water bottle and snuggle up for a few minutes with it. Don't burn yourself though.

    Be careful to eat healthy foods, honey. You don't want to become miserable because you can't fit into your favorite sexy tight jeans. ;) If you can't do anything physical, now's the time to do mental exercises like planning the landscaping with vegetables around your future cabin, playing music and watching clouds for the shapes they make with your child. Get on the Internet and do research into alternative energy or the breeds of poultry, cattle, goats, horses or dogs that you'll want in the future. What's the prices and who has them? Some goats are better to the north than in the hot weather of Texas. Bear that sort of thing in mind.

    Do visual exercises for relaxation, not just resting, not just napping, but working on relaxing the mind as well as the body. This will help with the nightmares if you do them before you go to bed. This exercise requires you to recall some of the happiest and most relaxed moments in your life - the time you learned that you were expecting your first child, the moment DH popped the question, or when you finished a challenging project with a great deal of satisfaction. And talk with your doc about the nightmares. They stem from your accident and your mind is trying to deal with it through these horrifying dreams. If they continue, you may need to talk with other survivors in a group setting for emotional support in a physical setting.

    Hang in there, Jena. YOU are a strong woman with a good family who are there for you. God is there for you too. Talking with Him can help too.

    Keep in touch, TXjudi
  14. VonWolfen

    VonWolfen Well-Known Member

    May 23, 2004
    I would think a bra is optional on this forum...but you can check with the moderator!
  15. countrygrrrl

    countrygrrrl PITA

    Aug 4, 2003
    Zone Unknown
    Jena, I had no idea! I'm going to have to go back and read your old posts to find out what happened.

    A long time ago --- years and years ago --- I worked as a cook, making soups and specials and desserts. one night, they pulled me out to be hostess --- I was opening the door for some customers and all I remember is the door slamming. :confused:

    Apparently, it caught the end of all the fingers on my left hand.

    In any case, I lost the tip of one, just the very tip, and the others just needed recuperation. While I was in the emergency room and surgery (I made them let me stay awake during it :rolleyes: --- why, I don't know, but i did), they made me keep my arm straight up ... and what I found is, it took a lot of work to do it and my arm got really tired, but Idid best when I kept that arm elevated above my head at all times during the recuperation.

    This is a very common accident - when I went back to work, 3/4s of the guys in the kitchen held their hands up and, sheesh, I'd never noticed but they all had messed up or missing fingers. :eek:

    That's been 15 years ago and the most messed up finger still feels funny --- but no one even notices - a doctor friend who didn't know abot the accident grabbed it once and said the way it curled at the end was characteristic of some disease - she had no idea til I told her that that finger had been chopped off at the end and what she was seeing was the handiwork of an orthopedic surgeon who just happened to be in the emergency room that night.

    It takes time but you'll be alright and you'll learn to adapt and, trust me, people won't even notice and you won't even remember you have the injury in a year or so. In the meantime, sleep, keeping it elevated over your head and eating well are the best things you can do.
  16. Jena

    Jena Well-Known Member

    Aug 13, 2003
    i had a decent day before i wrote this and went out to wal-mart, walked to the video store, etc. that was followed by two miserable days. today i feel good enough that i've only taken motrin (no vicodin)so far. i am NOT going anywhere though! i'm not willing to pay the price of two miserable days again.

    i still feel half-loaded from all the meds i've been on, but half-loaded is better than fully whacked out!

    i've watched no less than 10 movie rentals, plus all the pay-per-views, plus everything on cable. i hate tv and generally don't watch much. i guess i got my quota in for the next few years. it's hard to do anything more mindful though due to being whacked out! sometimes the BEST ideas you come up with while taking massive quantities of vicodin, just don't seem rational when you are not hehe.

    thank you for all the advice and suggestions. it really does help when i get to the low spots. i'm dreading tomorrowand the unvieling of my fingers. time to see what's really under those bandages...scary, but i'm so lucky that it's only fingers.

  17. Mike in Ohio

    Mike in Ohio Well-Known Member

    Oct 29, 2002

    At least you are mobile. Way back when I was a younker I had a little mishap in a shipyard accident. I had quite a few things broken and was laid up for an extended period of time. You can always use this time to plan or to market your beef. You can spend a little time looking into that sharecrop idea you mentioned a while back (the veggies).

  18. Hi,
    I'm new here but wanted to share that I've read bits and pieces of this to my DD. Her finger was crushed while riding in the bucket of our skid loader. She grabbed the back of hte bucket when they hit a bump. She had a compound fracture and later surgery to insert pins.

    It's been good for her to hear practical advice ... especially that she needs to slow down!

    Hope recovery goes well!
  19. I'm glad to hear that you are feeling a little bit better. I broke my left hand back in February and I think that the worst part was not doing the work that you're accustomed to.

    Looking out the window at the brick wall that was only 10% done. The light fixtures I had pulled out and couldn't replace with new wiring. Having to ask my wife to drive me everywhere because both my car and truck are stick shifts. Not being able to do so much as hold a nail in place to hit it.

    That was the worst part of it all. Worse than the actual pain. I know how you feel. In time, even if your hand doesn't get back to normal, you'll learn little tricks to doing things differently and you will be back on the land taking care of your own animals and getting the work done.

    - cville_jack
  20. wr

    wr Moderator Staff Member Supporter

    Aug 10, 2003
    Alberta, Canada
    Jena, please relax and let yourself heal. I'm quite sure the biggest problem is that you can't do what you normally would in a day. You really shouldn't be near livestock until your hand heals properly. I know what you're thinking but the risk of infection is too great. It's only been a week and that's not long enough to heal the kind of damage you've got. I was laid up one summer and if you were able to ask my family, they'd be more than happy to tell you what a poor patient I was. Looking back on it all, I'm very sure that my fussing, howling and trying to do more than I should slowed my recovery by a couple weeks. Accept the help while you have it, find a book and start reading, go for a walk if you feel up to it, but don't push your luck. You've started to heal and your body is using all the energy it has to help you heal, you really don't want a setback. I'm sorry you had the accident but don't make things worse for yourself. Please take care of your health first, too much of your world depends on you being healthy and I would suggest that you're berating yourself for the accident, don't bother, it's counter productive. So many of us have done similar without thinking and some of us were luckier than others but it's not like most of us haven't put our limbs in dangerous places without thinking.