Last week (Thursday) my 14 year old came home from school for lunch very upset. There is a boy in the same grade who is just ill mannered. He harrasses everyone, makes noises in class, etc, but especially loves to dig at my son. He was sitting behind my son whispering names like, 'N-word' 'beaner' 'greaser' and my son told him to stop (this is nothing new, this kid does this all the time). My son is caucasion, but darker skinned like me and my mother but I was horrified by the name calling regardless. The boys mother works in the school as the secretary to the principal. I called her just as my son was leaving to go back to classes and I told her there was an issue we needed to discuss and when would be an appropriate time to do so. She said for me to call her at home and started to give me her number, then she asked 'what exactly is the problem?' I said her son was using racial slurs and harrassing my son. Her response was to tell me that her son was adopted and of hawaiin descent and was the target of racial slurs from the time he was a kindergartener and that my son needed to toughen up, that it was really not a big deal! After a second of stunned silence, I told her I was appalled that this was her reaction and that if her son was the target of name calling, then he has an even bigger responsibility to not subject other kids to that! She then told me that I needed to find something else to do with my time because this was petty in her opinion. I said it's obvious to me why your son has behavioral issues if he has a mother who makes excuses for his poor behavior. She responded that I was the one with poor behavior by calling her at her job to discuss this. I told her not to try and twist this, that I had begun my call by asking her when would be a good time to discuss this issue and SHE was the one who asked what was going on. I told her to put me through to the principal at that point. The principal said he would look into things. That afternoon, when my son came home, he had a swollen cheek that later turned into a black eye. Turns out this boy had continued his harrassment, tapping my son on his head with a pencil, etc. My son asked for the kid to be moved. The teacher told the boy to move then she walked out into the hallway. As the boy passed by my son, my son handed him a smiley face sticker and said that he seemed to be in a bad mood and maybe that would cheer him up. That was a poor choice on my son's part. When he handed him the sticker, the kid threw it in my sons face and grabbed a paper my son had on his desk and ripped it up. My son grabbed this boy by the shirt and told him to leave him alone. My son said he knew getting physical was not a good choice so he let go and turned to walk away. The boy tackled him and threw him into a desk and at this point the teacher came in and her and a few students got between them. They were sent to the principal and placed in ISS for three days. What really bothers me is that no one called me. My son was wrong to grab this kid, but at the same time, I understand his frustration because this has been going on for years...constant harrassment. How would you handle this situation? Do you think I should call the principal again or just let it go since a few days have passed?