What do you think this is?

Discussion in 'Countryside Families' started by mammawof3, Dec 13, 2006.

  1. mammawof3

    mammawof3 Well-Known Member

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    My step dad passed away last Feb.-almost immediatly after the funeral mom started reporting "strange" goings on at her house--his shaver being moved back to where he always kept it-a light being turned off,on,off,on until she said his name-then it stopped-a mushroom on the l-room floor (he loved them)-pennys in her car seat(he always picked them up if he saw one)-smelling him in bed w/her at night-now it has gotten to the point that she feals him poking her w/his elbow in her sleep, and rolls over when she tells him too--AND-ahe now tells me that she SAW him--standing in her bedroom doorway, just looking at her-that he was "kinda filmy" looking, but you couldn't really see thru him-when she accknowledged seeing him, he dissapeared in a flash. Now, these are Christain people..who firmly believe that you go to heaven or hell--"to be absent from the body, is to be presant with the Lord"...Mom is compforted by all this, she believes he is keeping watch over her, that "evidentally"-sometimes, if the spouse left behind..really can't handle the aloneness, The spirit is allowed to hang around for awhile..i just don't know what to think..i believe you go to Heaven..i don't know if this is all in her "mind", and since it is peaceful for her..so be it. I guess it concerns me, cuz i can't help but worry over her..the small farm she lives on,is too much outside work for her, my grown sons and i have helped out w/yard work ect, and won't mind continuing...but...she says things like "i can never leave this house, cuz this is where he is!" What do you think, where might this fit in with biblical beleifs? :shrug:
     
  2. SteveD(TX)

    SteveD(TX) Well-Known Member

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    I know of nothing in the Bible that would make me think this would go along with any "biblical beliefs". Don't take this the wrong way, but I believe that your Mom needs counseling to deal with the death of your father. Time may take care of this, but you can't be sure. Good luck with this.
     

  3. suzfromWi

    suzfromWi Well-Known Member Supporter

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    Counsiling no, she,ll be fine. When my dad died I was very sad. I was his baby DD.One night I got up to go to the bathroom and had to pass thru the dining room. As I did I KNEW he was sitting at my table. It scared me so I put my hand over my eyes and hurried to the bathroom. When I finally came out I KNEW he was gone. Ive regretted that ever since and its been 40 years. He also made his presence known to mom altho she didnt see him. The smell of coffee, the front door opened and no one was there and the dog was very upset. I truly believe sometimes before they cross over they can come to comfort and say goodby. If it comforts her, let it be.
     
  4. sisterpine

    sisterpine Goshen Farm Supporter

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    I agree that this is mostly a normal experience when a very close loved one passes away. I heard my father talking to me for quite some time after he passes. And to this day I speak outloud to him when I need advice about something. And no I dont need counseling, I am the counselor. I often assist clients with issues such as this and once they realize it is normal and will eventually pass they are mostly fine with it. just my two cents, sis
     
  5. Wildwood Flower

    Wildwood Flower Halfway, OR & Wagoner, OK

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    I think it's a common phenomenon with those who have lost a close loved one. And it seems harmless.
     
  6. Ardie/WI

    Ardie/WI Well-Known Member Supporter

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    I think this happens with humans and beloved pets sometimes. They are half here and half gone. I "saw" both a dog and recently a cat that had died. I've never seen a human who had passed but I've felt the presence of the spirit of them. It's harmless.
     
  7. TnMtngirl

    TnMtngirl Well-Known Member Supporter

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    My sister is going through something like this.Her MIL passed away back in the fall and she and her husband moved into her house.She is always telling me Bonnie has move this or closed a door or turned the tv off.
    I think it is just something a few people go through,missing a loved one so much,just needing them to be there a while longer...the things are so real to the grevieing person,it helps them through the process.I have noticed sis dont mention happenings as often now.
    Your mom will be ok,just listen and agree.
     
  8. largentdepoche

    largentdepoche Well-Known Member

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    Our God is a loving and understanding God, I don't think he'd have a problem with your Dad spending some time with your Mom. I think our relatives aren't "tied" to heaven and they can come and go as they please.

    I'm sorry to hear about your Dad's passing.

    Angels come to Earth in human form so why can't we visit our family in the afterlife :)

    Be not forgetful to entertain strangers: for thereby some have entertained angels unawares. - Hebrews 13:2

    Kat
     
  9. mammawof3

    mammawof3 Well-Known Member

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    mom has a CD of Christain music,she found a song on there about 'when you get to Heaven,look for me'"--It made her cry.She leant it to freinds at church, When they returned it, they told her it kept sticking on one song, over again-when they took it out, too see what was wrong, it had a TEARDROP on it--Guess what song it stuck on!-(She hadn't told them) :angel:
     
  10. Becca65

    Becca65 Well-Known Member

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    aww it's so hard to lose a loved one :( I believe she's seeing things for a reason, just him showing his love before he sets off.
    When my mom passed away I heard her voice it sounded so sad, like she just wasn't ready to leave yet.. makes me sad thinking about it, but i know she went to heaven. she went so fast i wasn't able to say goodbye.
    just listen to her and let her see things and think things, it will take time to heal but it does get easier, believe it or not.
     
  11. emulkahi1

    emulkahi1 Well-Known Member

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    I wouldn't be too quick to chalk up your mother's experiences to mental instability, especially if she shows no other signs of it (i.e. are her stories of your stepdad the only "symptom"?). I know that, within my own family, there have been experiences like what you described. Maybe it is your Mom just really wanting your father to still be around, or maybe he really IS there.

    I believe that there are many (many) things about Heaven, and our life after this physical one, that are well beyond our limited human ability to comprend. "To be absent from the body means to be present with the Lord" does not mean that your stepdad might not also be present with your mother. I am sure though that, it is well within our loving and all-powerful God's abilities to make it possible, whether or not we are able to understand how he does it :).

    I am so sorry for the loss of your stepfather. I hope that your mother, you and your family are holding up all right.

    Erin
     
  12. tamsam

    tamsam Well-Known Member

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    Yes things happen that cannot be explained. My dad always had a beautiful garden that he enjoyed so much. When he passed he was in the garden and had a heart attact. I decided to keep the garden going as things were just starting to come up. Well nearly everything in the garden died and when it rained there would be one foot print right in the middle of the garden, no prints in or out just the one in the center. To this day nothing but grass will grow in that garden spot. My brother now has a small garden beside where that one was and it does great. No explanation for that one.That was in NC. Now my wifes sister passed unexpectedly almost 2 yrs ago and they lived about 20 miles away. She left a 7 and 17 yr old behind. For almost 2 months our garlic power would end up off the rack in the floor for no reason. Debbie dw sis loved to cook with garlic and even though we would put the garlic in back of all the other spices it would jump over them and end up in the floor. At the time my wife was having a hard time accepting that sis was gone and when we figured it was sis telling her she was ok and she came to terms with her death the garlic stayed put and is still in the same spot un used. We never figured this out but we have our guesses.
    Let your mom enjoy her visions or feelings as long as she can. You may even want to tell your dad when you are at thier home that you will watch over your mom. Maybe he just needs to know she will be ok. Good luck and give[[[ mom]]] a hug for me. Sam
     
  13. sancraft

    sancraft Well-Known Member

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    The body dies, but love doesn't. It sounds like your dad really loved your mom and wants to take care of her. I agree with letting him know you will care for your mom. It may give him the peace he needs to move on.
     
  14. Chas in Me

    Chas in Me Well-Known Member

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    I was in an old house one evening with a small group of friends. I watched as an apparition just showed up standing next to the fireplace. I was staring at this spirit when the owner said to me,"Is he here?" Whoa, you talk about the hair on your neck standing up?
    I nodded, too wigged out to speak. The spirit was a man, dressed in black pants, white shirt with no collar and a dark vest. The owner of the house calmly asked all of us to join her in a prayer to release his soul.
    We did and he disappeared.
    Strange night on the coast of Maine.
     
  15. Farmer Willy

    Farmer Willy Well-Known Member Supporter

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    Sounds like she loved him very much and doesn't want to let him go. I'd guess it's a mental thing for lack of somthing smoother to name it, but I don't think it's anything to worry about unless 'he' starts trying to get her to join him. I guess the best is to love her, be there to watch out for her, and see if time don't take care of it.
     
  16. EasyDay

    EasyDay Gimme a YAAAAY!

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    I, too, have had the experience. When my dad passed away, I was 10 y/o.

    A couple weeks later, I was laying in bed and my bedroom door opened about 8 inches, letting in the light from the hallway. I thought our dog had come in, so I tried to call her over. I didn't see her. I was leaning over looking under the bed for the dog when I clearly heard my dad say my name. I sat up FAST and yelled "MOM".

    She came running in. I told her what happened. She said it was just the shock of me losing my dad at such a young age. That didn't settle with me, so I told our preacher at church. He said that he believed that my dad just wanted me to know that, even though he was gone, he was still there.

    If it comforts your mom, leave it be.
     
  17. emulkahi1

    emulkahi1 Well-Known Member

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    Just remembered a story that my Mom told me not long ago. When I was about 10yo, my 4yo cousin, Devon, died from a brain tumor. He was a remarkable child--very different in a very spiritual, almost adult sort of way. Before he ever got sick, he used to ask his grandmother (who was raising him, my great-aunt) to take him through graveyards. She said, the way he said it, it wasn't really morbid--it was just that he seemed to know that something would happen to him.

    Another time, also before he was sick (so he had to have been about 3) he was walking just slightly ahead of his grandmother and my grandmother through the mall (where the monuments are) in D.C. A group of Indian women dressed in their saris (hope I spelled that right) passed them. But one woman stepped away from the group and knelt in front of Devon and bowed her head. Without missing a beat, this 3 year old placed both his hands on her head, almost as if he was giving her a blessing. They paused like that for a second, and then the woman got up and went on her way. Devon continued walking on as if nothing had happened. Both his grandmother and mine saw it and were completely dumbfounded.

    Anyway, all that to say, he was a very unusual child. He died on Christmas Eve. The following summer, my Mom was in our kitchen, watching through the window as my 3 year old brother played with a neighbor child in our backyard. She said it was the oddest thing because it seemed like they were interacting with a 3rd person that she couldn't see. Over and over this thought occurred to her. Later, after he came in, she casually said to him that "It looked like you had fun playing outside today". And he responded by saying "Yeah, it was really fun to see Devon again." :-O

    There is no doubt in my mind that little Devon is in Heaven. Yet, my little brother--who was too young to ever make up such a story--played with him in our backyard months after his death.

    I don't understand it, but it makes me marvel at the things that might be possible that seem so hard to believe or understand now.

    Anyway, sorry for going on and on. I hope that you are doing alright :).

    Erin
     
  18. Jenn

    Jenn Well-Known Member Supporter

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    I believe in ghosts, as a best friend visited after her death and my dog visited me for some months after she was gone. However as a Dr. I can advise that 'hallucinations' of ghosts of one lost are normal up to 6 months after the death. After that the Drs and Psychiatrists define it as abnormal and maybe it's more than normal grief and officially, consultation with your Dr is recommended.

    My friend- when already dead but in a coma/on life support pending organ donation: I was able in the middle of winter to put a sprig of crabapple blossom from my yard in her braid in the hospital since it suddenly bloomed- on a tiny stray bit coming out of the ground 10 feet down the hill from the mother tree. OK, maybe the sewage pipe warmed that area, but we never again nor before had such a bouquet. Never saw her (or my dog) just felt the presence.