What’s more important?

Discussion in 'Homesteading Questions' started by Unregistered-1427815803, May 4, 2004.

  1. What’s more important? Peace of mind in the country or being “a slave to a wage.” in the city? What are the advantages of each? I have one foot in the city but prefer to have both feet in the country. What if I can’t “survive” in the country? A septic problem – oh my gosh – I call my apartment manager when the toilet overflows!!! Is there a Starbucks in the country? Can I trade my designer shoes for work boots? Just venting but appreciate comments.

    Country soul, city heart.
  2. Shrek

    Shrek Singletree Moderator Staff Member Supporter

    Apr 30, 2002
    North Alabama
    i prefer "being a master of a few slaves in the city and dictate from my country estate". Translation: I invest in a few small businesses in the city and run my greenhouse nursery here in the sticks. I burned my suits when I retired but kept my Tony Lamas and have an espresso / cappuccino maker in the kitchen :)

  3. Little Quacker in OR

    Little Quacker in OR Well-Known Member

    May 9, 2002
    :) Maybe you need to rent a place out in the peach and quiet of the "country" and find out?

    I don't think that "country" means the same to everyone. It can very to sorta rural, with a town just down the road, but with neighbors all around and handy when and if you need them...to virtual isolation with no close neighbors at all and many miles from any town.

    Just because you are out in the country doesn't mean there are no services available when you need them. We just had our septic tank pumped..get it done every six years or so. WE have dish TV etc.

    Frequently your neighbors will be a good mix of talents. Ours consist of: A contractor, a water engineer and excavating expert, a mechanic with up to date ratings on the new autos and and a good auto repair shop, a tax preparer..etc.

    So, these are pools of talent that are needed once in a while. I return help from them by caring for their stock when they want a vacation, providing help with vaccines, wormings etc are done or stock gets out and needs to be put back in. etc.

    So, first you need to decide just what it is you want. I'm a bit of a hermit and not all that fond of human company. If you are more gregarious..that's what the local grange, dances and all that are for as well as all kinds of other get-to-gethers for people to help one another.

  4. januaries

    januaries Well-Known Member

    Sep 12, 2003
    Country Soul, City Heart--

    Your post made me smile. I admit that I miss coffee shops and being able to wear 'fancy' clothes. I love dressing up; I love silly short skirts and pretty shoes and the way they make me feel; I love quaint little coffee shops, and the feeling of excitement and pride when I discover a new one; I love great big book stores and small specialty shops; I love a lot of things about the city. I miss some things about the city, and you'll probably miss them too. And that's okay.

    The fact is, you can't be two places at the same time. For any place you are, there are literally millions of places you aren't. You're always going to be missing something or somewhere. But you do get to choose which place you will embrace for whatever period of time. You evidently feel confident and secure in the city. Great!--now you get the fun of learning to be just as confident in the country. It's a good thing for a person to step out of his/her comfort zone. You'll surprise yourself. You'll make mistakes; you'll learn to deal with them, and you probably won't make them a second time. You'll have a lot of good stories to tell in your old age.

    The people on these message boards have good advice and experience to back it up, but in the end you'll have the final say-so. There is no "right" way to live in the country, as long as you're enjoying yourself. Maybe you want to keep wearing your designer shoes--there's no law against it! Maybe you want to schedule a "city day" once a month, when you wear nice clothes and drive to the nearest big city and visit your old haunts. Maybe you'll get a capuccino machine yourself and learn how to make the perfect froth. Maybe you'll purchase essential oils and make luxury soaps and bath salts--better than you could buy in any boutique. Whatever you do, you'll learn to thrive in the country in your own way, according to your own needs and desires. And it will be good.

    Be very careful of the things you tell yourself and assumptions you make. Little things make all the difference. When I find myself getting frustrated and uptight, I listen to the unspoken words inside my head. Usually they run along the lines of, "It's horrible to make a mistake! Everything will be ruined if I mess this up. It will be awful if I'm late. I'm not equipped to handle this situation..." and other nonhelpful things. In fact, it's not so very horrible to make a mistake. I can think of a lot worse things! Some things may be ruined if I mess this up, but not everything. It may be embarrassing if I'm late, but I can handle that. I may not have experience in a certain situation, but I have a brain and I can figure something out. Whenever you undertake something new and possibly difficult, it's the mental battles that are the hardest. Your post points that out. The good news is that you are completely capable of winning those mental battles! It's your head; it's your choice; you're in charge.

    Finally, don't let yourself continually compare the country to the city. Take the country as it is; accept it on its own terms. Make an effort to remind yourself of the good things. Take time to enjoy it. The city will always be there if you have to go back; and there may come a time when you are forced to return to the city. Until then, drink in all the good things about the country!
  5. Terri

    Terri Singletree & Weight Loss & Permaculture Moderator Staff Member Supporter

    May 10, 2002
    Listen to your heart, and use your mind to make it work--if you can.

    For us, that means settling for less land than we would like, but it was all we could afford. We live within an easy commute to jobs.

    When we decided to move, we looked for a place with farmland near by. First, DH got a job and I put out my applications and we moved into a duplex. I got a job, and we saved until we had a down payment. It would have been lovely to pay for something outright, but DH is not interested in roughing it, and a comfortable place will cost.

    We are currently in a good house on 1 acre, and we are looking forward to being able to build on our 5.5 acres in a few years. Meanwhile, I am putting in perennials and enjoying the land.
  6. It costs money to live in the country too. In many cases a lot more than in the city. Not much use for a tractor, 4wd truck,all types of tools and equipment, and on and on. Add to that how much more it costs if you do want or like to travel to the city for your pleasures or for your work.
  7. JulieNC

    JulieNC Well-Known Member

    May 29, 2002
    We have kind of a compromise going. We live in a rural area on ten acres. We are actually in a neighborhood, though, with all lots at 10 acres (with the exception of four 5-acre lots). We have neighbors (although we usually only see them when we're coming or going). It's nice having some folks not too far away (but not too close, either).

    We live about 12 minutes or so outside of a small town. The small town is growing, but in a nice way. We have a coffee shop where I can get my latte fix, a small independent book store where I'm known by name, and we even have a recreation center with a couple of indoor pools. 20 minutes away is a larger city, with most everything we need, but if we want to go to the real big city (Raleigh), we're only an hour away.

    The downside to living in the country but also keeping ties to the city is the commute. No way around it, you'll be driving. Where we are, even a quick trip to pick up milk is a half hour round trip. Not terrible by any means, but you learn to do your shopping when you're out and about and to make do if you run out of something in between trips.

    Personally, I think we have the perfect life. Dh's commute is 30 minutes each way, which isn't too bad. We have plenty of friends in the city who live much closer to work but have the same commute time because of traffic. The only downside is that I have a lot of driving to do with the kids' activities. My daughter's AAU basketball practices are a half hour away, and so that's 1 hour travel round trip. Since practices are two hours twice a week, I usually wind up loosing 4 hour chunks of time since it's too far to go home during practice. Add to that tennis (2 times a week, 20 minute commute each way), and swimming 4 days a week, 20 minute commute each way), and you can see that our days involve quite a bit of travel.

    I am soooooo looking forward to next year when dd gets her license!!!!