Thanksgiving: should I stay or go?

Discussion in 'Countryside Families' started by jen74145, Nov 19, 2006.

  1. jen74145

    jen74145 Well-Known Member Supporter

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    Alright, yet another person wondering what to do. ;)
    Huby and I are supposed to be going to his mother's for Thanksgiving. (we're bringing the ham). His sister and her two daughters came down from up north. Another sister has a three year old hubby hasn't seen since he was ten months or so, and she was going to come, but poor little boy has a nasty stomach bug, so they stayed home. Bit sad about that, but totally understand, and would rather sick people stay home than visit it on the rest of us.
    Well, get a call this afternoon, and hubby's mom is sick as a dog. She says she feels fine, just has a sinus infection. Ick, not something I want to catch!

    Then, the sister arrived today, two daughters in tow; the eleven year old immediately dashed to the restroom to vomit. Nice.

    Hubby STILL wants to go! He has not seen these people since last Thanksgiving, so I know he misses them, but frankly, I hate being sick. I also have no insurance, so if I were to come down with something... it's OTC and rest for me, and hope for no high fever.

    Shoot, would you go?
     
  2. caryatid

    caryatid Well-Known Member

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    I would send Hubby off, since he is determined to go, and stay home.
    Count your blessings and give your thanks while enjoying a nice quiet evening of time to yourself. :)
     

  3. seedspreader

    seedspreader AFKA ZealYouthGuy

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    Yup go... if he goes without you, you may still get the bug and not have been able to visit with family. Why make it akward for him explaining... "I care enough to come, but she's afraid of germs."

    If you don't go... he don't go. If he goes, you go. It's called being married.
     
  4. TeachMe

    TeachMe Active Member

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    My fiance is particularly careful about not getting sick (she is almost deathly afraid of having to vomit). I say that to say that I understand not wanting to get sick. However, you will also be missing a chance to spend time with people you rarely get to see. Assuming you want to spend time with them I would think that having your husband voice a concern to everyone and being careful yourself should be good prevention. Unless of course you convince yourself that you WILL get sick if you go, in which case you probably will get sick. Anyway, I can't really speak for your situation but if it were me I would likely be willing to risk getting sick in order to spend quality time with loved ones.
     
  5. jen74145

    jen74145 Well-Known Member Supporter

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    Err, no. Perhaps I should have stated it is all or nothing with us. He goes, I go. Frankly, I more than understand what being married is "all about", so please, don't jump to conclusions, and don't preach at me.

    Honestly, I would love to just stay home and have a nice, quiet few days with him, or perhaps go visit his father. FIL isn't doing very well right now...

    And for me, many of these people are not loved ones. Sorry, just how it is. Don't wish to get into it here.
     
  6. seedspreader

    seedspreader AFKA ZealYouthGuy

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    Hmmmm, you've stated that your husband "STILL wants to go", and then you ask "Shoot, would you go?" and you wonder why there would be confusion?

    So what you really have is he wants to go and you don't and whose decision is one that's going to be followed... Who normally makes the final decision on these things in your marriage?

    btw, don't take things so personal... no one has "preached" at you. It's a public forum and you are going to get all kinds of answers, all kinds of ways.
     
  7. TeachMe

    TeachMe Active Member

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    Sounds like you have all kinds of reasons for not wanting to go, maybe you just don't want to go.
     
  8. Speciallady

    Speciallady Well-Known Member

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    Jen I think you should go. For a couple of reasons. First being it's a chance to honor your husband by letting him make the decision for the home. Second,It's his family, and they are a very precious thing to have. Can you come home early? Try to take some extra vitamins this week, to fight off any bug you might catch, Talk to your husband let him know that you are feeling a little uncomfortable about going, if you need to. Explain to him why you feel the way you do, and if he still wants to go, go. :)
     
  9. Tagalong

    Tagalong Go Hogs Go

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    I would still go.Like others have said it's part of being married.But you can start taking an OTC med called AIRBORNE the day before Thanksgiving.A school teacher invented this stuff and I know from personally trying it that it works.Take it at first sign of cold,or when you know your going to be somewhere there are sick ones. Try it see if how it does for you. Good Luck

    Amy
     
  10. Beltane

    Beltane Enjoying Four Seasons

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    I would go. Who knows, you may have already been exposed to the same virus at some point and won't get her cold. Since you don't see them very much, you may actually be carring a virius that their bodies haven't seen before and and they may get sick from you! I would really go ~ family and friends are the most important thing.
     
  11. Jillis

    Jillis Well-Known Member

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    The way I see it, if a virus is going around, you stand an excellent chance of getting it no matter what, sooner or later. So unless I have something coming up that either myslef or my child should not miss, I just go ahead with my regularly scheduled activities.
    One example, there is a really nasty chest cold going around our area right now. I lot of people we have contact with have had it. All my sons have gotten it one at a time. Now my daughter is going to be competing in a regional dance competition in the first week of December. She just came down with it. And I am actually glad. I can stop worrying that she will be sick with this in 2 weeks. I am not happy she is sick---she performed at a nursing home yesterday with the other competition soloists and groups, and her singing voice was quite scratchy---but I AM glad she got it now and not then.

    If its going around, you will more than likely be exposed to it, either at work, at the supermarket, and etc. So go with your hubby, love on him by giving him some family time.
    Think how blessed you are that you only have to see these people once a year or less, since you don't seem to be so fond of them.
    My early marriage years were made nightmarish by my inlaws. I would have been happy to only have to see them annually!
    Schedule some R & R for another time, so you don't feel like you wasted a little bit of "free" time.

    Blessings, Jillis!
     
  12. Ruby

    Ruby Well-Known Member Supporter

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    If it were me I would jump at the chance. My parent both died in the '70s, my husband's parents are both gone and we will be alone Thanksgiving. I really do miss the families being together at holidays.

    Do you grocery shop? The grocery stores are the most germ ladden place there is. The grocery cart handles are full of germs. Just think about it. Sick people go grocery shopping and sneeze on things. I was in a store the other day and say a man pick up a can of something and while he was reading the label he sneezed then put the can back. They will cough into their hand then pick something up, look at it then put it back.

    I would not let a few germs stop me from visiting family, unless you have very young babies. Besides the little girl who had to hurl soon as she got there maybe was just car sick. If your MIL just has a sinus infection I don't think you would get it from her. Go and injoy yourself.
     
  13. Cheryl in SD

    Cheryl in SD Living in the Hills Supporter

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    This is Saturday. Thanksgiving isn't for another 5 days. I would assume every is going to be well by then and go. Our rule of thumb for major vents is this, we go regardless of what others have, but we stay home if we are sick so as not to share.