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:Bawling: The witch, I mean, mother called last week and said she was coming to get the children this weekend. School starts in 2 weeks and J (6) was looking forward to starting school here, being with the friends she met at day camp and being a cheerleader. The baby (2), is enrolled to start a mother's morning out program in Sept. He'd go M-W, 9-12, to start and move up to M-F, once we see how he handled it. His potty training is going well, all dry day yesterday, even at nap. J has met her teachers, and gotten her new book bag.

Mom called again last night and asked J what kind of book bag she wanted. J told her that she already had one and mom insisted that I take that one back and she is buying "her child" a book bag. J tpld mom that she wanted to go to school here and come home on weekends. Mom said, if she went to school here, she wouln't get her on weekends. She would never see her again. So, mom essentially blackmailed child into coming home with the threat of abandoning her if she didn't. :Bawling:

I told Angie about the call last week. Her thoughts were there is money and/or a man involved in mom's recent effort to get the children. She has called only 3 times all summer. Even when her DD or I leave a message, she doesn't call back. Well, I think Angie's assessment was spot on. She called from a strange cell phone yesterday while out shopping. It was some man's name on the caller ID and I heard a man's voice in the background saying, "you want this, you want that, go ahead and get it. No, get both." :grump:

The last man she was with was outside talking to someone about his upcoming court case and his lawyer guaranteeing that he could be the probation violation charge. I guess you can seel why I'm worried. :eek:

I am so afraid that she will leave the children home alone and one of these low lifes will figure out that she leaves them alone, come over when no one is home, invite himself in and the unthinkable will happen. Knowing this little girl, she is too eager for attention and I fear won't tell mom for fear of upsetting mom and having mom throw her out. Her mother threatens to leave her places when she misbehaves. She has left her in stores when the child wandered off. The mom would hide and watch the child searching for her and not come out until the child was frantic. :flame:

She wandered from me one day and wet her pants because she thought I had left her. :flame:

I will try and keep as close contact as I can. Mom won't always let J use the phone to call me. I'm writing my number down in several places for J to keep with her. If she leaves them alone, I am calling CPS. I think if CPS starts investigating, she will send them back. She can't stand up to the scutiny of an investigation. :nono:

J was finally feeling secure. She gave me the food from her treasure book to make room for her giant punecone that a friend brought back for her from out West and som pretty rocks that she found on the land. :)

Mom wanted to pick them up on Saturday, but I insisted that she wait until Sunday. J had been invited to a birthday/slumber party for Saturday. She's been looking forward to it all summer. It's at the home of one of the children that she met a day camp. I wasn't going to let mom ruin that for her. It'll be bittersweet however. These 2 were inseparable all summer and were going to be in the same class and cheerleading together this year. Now, J will have to say goodbye. :Bawling:
 

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So sorry to hear this, Sandra. It doesn't sound good. If the mom is that wishy-washy, maybe she'll change her mind AGAIN, after she starts thinking about all the additional responsibility of two kids. I hope things will turn in your favor.
 

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Oh no! That is just heartbreaking! Those poor children...... can't you call CPS now, isn't there something on the record about her already?

So sorry.
Kitty
 

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((((HUGS)))) Will be praying for the kids (and you) and that the witch...er...mom doesn't put them in danger. People like her shouldn't be allowed to come near their kids.
 

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Oh sancraft, I really feel for you. This is such sad news.

I wanted to suggest that, in addition to giving J several notes with your phone # on it, you teach her your number over the next few days. You'll probably have to do a lot of drills, since time is short, but if you set it to a tune it will stick much faster. (My DS learned gramma's number by singing it to the tune of "Jenny 867-5309" :) )
 

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Is there nothing you can do to keep them?? Those poor babies! They need to be with you, not their "mother" what about your nephew, can he fight for custody? Or you fight her?
 

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OH my word - my thoughts are with you all. Didn't you get some sort of formal custody over these kids? Good luck

hoggie
 

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Sandra, This just makes me want to cry. I am so sorry you have to deal with this - and that those children are experiencing this.

I haven't been around as much as I'd like on this board, so maybe you disproved it, but if there's any doubt that that burn was intentional on the little girl, or that they were going hungry, I think you really have to get involved and fight this one out. I know the price is potentially high, but it is just frightening to think of them going back to an abusive mother.

I would try and get your nephew involved if you can, and otherwise, I might gently try and get another family member (I think it would less likely to burn a bridge if it didn't come from you) to mention that she thought it would be wise to have an investigation into the children's safety, just for their sake. Perhaps Mom might have an incentive to avoid that?

Sharon
 

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Sandra,

I am so sorry. Especially for the children who need the stability you provide for them.

I'll be praying for all of you.

Beth
 

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Well, isn't that just a rotten turn of events.

I can't stand to hear about "biological incubators", another word for women who have babies, and yet, aren't really mothers. In my book, a mom is sorta like a dog, in the sense that they should have (like dogs) unconditional love for their children (the dogs owner). A mother doesn't mistreat or torture they're children, and should sacrifice theirselves, for the children.

I sincerely wish there was a way to keep them. Adoption? I'd half way be willing to just 'run' with the children, and not allow them to contact 'mom'.

Right or Wrong, the girls will suffer, again, if they go home.
 

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Sandra I'm so sorry and this just doesn't sound good at all.And I realize there is nothing you can do.

Next time get Full Custody before you get this serious,its the only way to keep your Heart from being broken again.

big rockpile
 

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Sandra,
My heart is breaking with you for these precious little ones.

I wish I had advice, but prayers will have to do.

When our 'rental son' is with his bio mother for even an afternoon, I worry he won't be brought home. Just a little over a week for us and we should have legal guardianship of him.

Dear Father of Mercy and Wisdom - we beseach Your loving goodness to turn the heart of these children's mother. Allow her to put the welfare of the children over her selfish wants. Keep the children safe and wrapped in Your loving kindness. Shield them with a hedge of Your mighty angels. Give Sandra the comfort of Your eternal wisdom. It is when the trouble times come that we need to draw closer to You and have faith in Your plans for us. We ask these things in the name of Your Son, our Saviour, Jesus Christ.
 

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I was so afraid of this when you first took them. My sister did the same thing with her boys,only they were older. They were "too hard" to handle so she gave them way to family members. When they were old enough to be useful, she wanted them back. One returned, the other said no he wasn't going back. And he never did. Of course he is the one who turned out more emotionally stable.

I wouldn't be surprised it she does this again - when life gets harder or the man is gone. So keep in touch with them as you can. Send pictures, letters, and try to keep phoning. All you can do now is make sure they know you are still there for them.

Maybe she will let you have them on some weekends - so her and her friend can go out! Get whatever time you can with them - no matter how is sounds to you, if it appeals to her.
 

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I'm so sorry about this for you.

But let me offer you a word of encouragement:

You WILL get the kids back. She obviously doesn't love them, and needs them for some selfish convenience. As soon as that need of them passes (and it will), you'll get them back. I've seen this happen before.

In fact, I would almost predict that it will only be a matter of weeks or a few months and they'll be back with you.

Irresponsible parents don't suddenly "Become" responsible parents. She'll be dumping them back with you shortly...hang in there and try to keep in touch with them in the mean-time.
 

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Oh, Sandra. :Bawling:

I agree, if you can it's time to call CPS and tell them what's going on; at the very least maybe those kids can have one more person looking out for them, and maybe they'll get to stay with you.

Poor little babies, it sounds to me like their "mom" uses them to get attention when it's convenient for her.
 
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Be sure the little girl knows "Good touch/Bad touch" and that it's OK to call 911 if someone is touching her. It is as important as calling in a fire.


The good news is that you have about a month before school starts. Mom might decide that it's too much to do and want to send them back out to you. Honestly, though the biggest blessing would be if CPS did get involved. Mom would have so much time to prove up or they would mover her on. In the meantime you could have the kids. Mom wouldn't be able to jerk them around like this.
 

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We went through this. We fought 2 years in court. It was worth every minute. The babe is back with his mother. But in that two years she married a man. They both went through extensive rehab.
They were going to give us custody. But after seeing all they had done to fix the wrong they had done we knew it was time to let go. I raised him from infancy. The mother had many partners. And would flake out and go on Crystal binges. Completely neglecting the many children. She would visit grandma and say she was going to the store and it would be months before she would show back up.


But she changed. It CPS to get involved for this to happen though.
I say, if you love the kids call CPS now. But you also need to be willing to do what is best for the children IF she straitens up and let her take them back.

It about killed us but a child belongs with their mother. IF she is healthy and will not hurt them.

My heart goes out to you. I know you are in pain. :grouphug:
 
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