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Discussion Starter #1
Hi everyone, you may or may not remember I am the one iwth the daughter whose fiancee died in November. Well time ahs gone by, lots of things have happened, but sufice it to say she no longer lives here. Hasn't since about march.
She used to come by and pick up her mail every week or so, then every oher week. Well now I have her mail from about 2 months. I have no idea where she is living, just with some guy in the larger city near us. But no address.
We have called her, left messages on her phone mail telling her she has tons of mail. she never returns the calls. I know that many of the letters are from bill collectors, as there are several with"final notice." "Notice of Cancellation" that was from her insurance company. and others.
So what I was wondering do I just write on the envelope "Not at this address, address unknown." and put it back in the mail? Or what??

I also still gets many many phone calls from her creditors, I tell them she doenst live here, hasn't lived in in several months and no i dont know where she is. I give them the number I have for her cell phone, somehow I dont think she calls them back anymore than she does me. LOL

Her dad called the boyfriends cell phone, and he put her on the phone. Dad told her that she had all this mail and she said she would be here on Wednesday as she had anothe job interview anyway. Needless to say she didnt show up, not today either.

So what do Ido with all this mail?? there is probably about 50 pieces with mre coming in every day. Soon it is the beginning of a new month and I can forsee much more coming in.

Alice in Virginia
 

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I had a similar situation with a relative I tried to help out once. I started writing 'Wrong Address' on them and putting them back in the mail. It took a long time before things stopped coming in the mail. As for phone calls, about all you can do is get your number changed. If it's a collection agency, they will not believe you that your daughter does not live there. They won't believe anything you tell them. And when one collection agency isn't able to collect, they will simply sell the account to another collection agency and you will start getting umpteen calls from the new agency every day, and so on and so on. Get your number changed and you'll save yourself a lot of headaches.

Your daughter has been notified, and if you have no way of knowing where she is all you can do is send stuff on to her last known address (unless yours was the last known). Stop sweating it, just return the mail as 'unknown' or 'not at this address' or 'wrong address' or something. If she's not going to get her mail and take care of her bills, it's not your problem anymore.
 

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First and for most - I want to say I will be praying for your daughter and her situation. Losing a loved one is a very difficult thing to get over and I pray that she will find peace in her life.

To answer your question about the mail - I am the PMR at our local post office and I would encourage you to get a current address from her. If you can't or she won't give it to you - tell her that you are going to start sending things back. Really what she needs to do is to fill out a forwarding card and submit it to her local po so she can start getting her mail where she is. If nothing else you can contact your local postmaster and explain the situation to him/her and ask them for advise on how to best handle the situation. Another alternative for her would be to have her mail fowarded to the town where she is living as general delivery if she didn't want to use the boyfriend's address as a permament address. As a last resort - you may have to start sending things back. Write on the left side of the address - return to sender - not at this address. Good luck and I hope this helps.
 

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Take the mail back to the post office and explain to the clerk the problem. All mail should be than marked-moved left no address. They will give this information to the carrier who then will sort her mail and put it through the proper channels.
 

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Former letter carrier here, Bear is correct.

Simply write "Moved, left no address."

Writing "wrong address" indicates that the letter may have been mis-delivered and is unclear as to the meaning.
 

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I was just thinking of you the other day and wondering how things had worked out for your family. While I am sorry to hear that your daughter seems to still be struggling, I hope having your house and lives back to yourselves has been good for you and your husband.

Sounds like you have gotten some good advice on the postal issue and so I won't comment on that.
 

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Windy in Kansas said:
Former letter carrier here, Bear is correct.

Simply write "Moved, left no address."

Writing "wrong address" indicates that the letter may have been mis-delivered and is unclear as to the meaning.

I've tried this ("moved, no forwarding address"). The letters keep getting sent right back here anyway.
 

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i have the same problem with my son, i have told the people to quit calling cuz he doesnt live here and i dont know where he is at after a little arguing they do quit calling but i had to be real "blunt" about it. they will try to tell you that they cant stop cuz that is the number he gave them but i've told them i am paying the bill it is my phone and as the number holder i want them to stop calling my house or i will call the attorney generals office--that seems to work. of course you have to go thru that with every bill, but i did get it to stop.
 

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It may take awhile, but "not at this address" usually takes care of it eventually. As for the phone calls, I'm pretty sure that all you have to say is "do not call this number again" and then by law they must stop calling. That would be true even if she did live there.

I'm very glad to hear that she has left your house. She may be no closer to fixing her life, but at least she's no longer ruining yours (not daily, at least). I hope you & your husband are finding some peace together.
 

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Discussion Starter #11
Thanks everyone for the good advice. I think I am going to try a combination, we will leave another message on her machine saying that she has until Monday to come get her mail. If she doenst come on monday I will take it to the PO here, the postmaster is a very nice man, I will explain it to him and hand over all the mail. after I write on it "moved left no address."
We will see, again thanks for the info!!
Yes things are definatley quieter around here. Trouble is SHE left but she has left all her stuff here. I have no idea what she is wearing, or shoes or makeup or anything cause she left for work one day and just never came back. I guess she bought all new. What a waste.
Our basement is FULL to overflowing with all her stuff, TVs, clothes, furniture, treadmill, and whole lots of other stuff!! LOL I guess we will keep it here for awhile and if she doesnt show up have a large yard sale!! LOL
Alice in Virginia
 

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fellini123 said:
Our basement is FULL to overflowing with all her stuff, TVs, clothes, furniture, treadmill, and whole lots of other stuff!! LOL I guess we will keep it here for awhile and if she doesnt show up have a large yard sale!! LOL
Alice in Virginia
Why not add that to your phone message about the mail? "Pick up your mail AND your stuff!"
 

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We had the same problems with my sister. But a lot less stuff and only a few collectors. Now we know where she is so we can call her to get her mail when she has a ride to get up here.

Tell her to pick the junk up or your having a yard sale-and your keeping all the money you make.
 

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Aren't there laws about this stuff? Kind of like when a tenant leaves their stuff in an apartment they've rented? You might consider consulting a lawyer or something - and screening your calls. Put a message on your voice mail/answering machine saying "So-and-so does not live here, I have no address for her, please stop calling me. Any questions, call my lawyer" or something like that.
 

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SteveD(TX) said:
I've tried this ("moved, no forwarding address"). The letters keep getting sent right back here anyway.
The very same letters that you have written on?

I can understand more coming from the same company, but not the post office delivering the same ones time after time.

If it is different ones the company sending them probably thinks the person is still there and just avoiding them by the "Moved, left no address" notation.
 

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I suppose that you could also turn in a Form 3575 Change of Address card.

If the mail you don't want delivered bears the same last name as yours you will need to turn in a 3575 for each individual you no longer want mail for. Be sure to mark "Individual" and NOT "Family" meaning only mail for for those that have left should be forwarded, not yours.

In the new address section simply put in "Moved, left no address" or "Moved, left no forwarding address".

You might also leave a note for your letter carrier to make sure they understand that ONLY your mail is to be delivered, but that indeed you do still want yours.
 
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