Pc expressions VS what we use to say

Discussion in 'Countryside Families' started by comfortablynumb, Nov 27, 2006.

  1. comfortablynumb

    comfortablynumb Well-Known Member

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    I was directed to post tis in a separate topic, and I agree it was a misplaced question, but an honest one with no offense meant.


    Quote:

    thats a new word for it I've not heard before... is handicapped or mentally retarded a bad term now?
    not trying to be a jerk, I dont want to say the wrong term and get my face punched one of these afternoons.


    people keep shifting the euphemisms and then some of us look like monsters if we say cripple, handicap, retarded, blind deaf or crazy.

    why do people keep shifting the words? wasnt "handicappped" good enough?

    I was in a wheelchair for 2 yrs... I had a tee shirt that said GIMPY.

    I was handicapped.

    often called "crippled"

    I never got steamed over it.... I was a gimpy racked up crippled handicap.

    now, these words are getting kinda silly... "differently abled"

    this literslly means they ave abilities normal people [can I say "normal"?] lack when the total opposite is the truth, the differently abled lack abilities of normal people.

    no offense but the drive to be PC is getting us in trouble.

    now a child prodegy, who caan play a piano at 2 yrss ols, thats differently abled.
    a 12 yr old who cant tie their shoes, thats handicapped.

    how does an OK word become a dirty work after a few yrs?

    "people" use it to mean something derogatory"

    uummm... ok, then why dont we change the other words like.... gay or blonde or poor or ..... you see?

    I didnt ask the question to be a jerk.... I just wanna know a nice list of curreent PC newspeak so someone doesnt sue me or shoot me.

    or dont we call it PC anymore?

    :help:
     
  2. comfortablynumb

    comfortablynumb Well-Known Member

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    and in a part 2 of this question; if you have all these complications in having kids that 3 die and their is a high risk of fetal dammage if you succeed, is it not a little foolhearty [can I say foolhearty?] to take the risk and not go the adoption route?
     

  3. Anita in NC

    Anita in NC Well-Known Member

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    Having been called many names over the years I have to say it is less about the actual words and more about the intent. Are the words meant to be hurtful or unkind.

    I spent many years in a wheelchair, many years limping (still do sometimes), my arms don't go straight as I have Rheumatoid Arthritus and I'm bald (alopecia universalis).

    My son, age 10, is also bald. I call him baldie or egghead but he knows it's in a loving way as we just smile and joke with each other. Coming from someone else it might be meant in an unkind way.

    I am somewhat confused about what to call.... ummm, I guess they call themselves Little People but I have also heard the terms migits and dwarfs. Dwarfs make sense because they have dwarfism. Who knows.....
     
  4. comfortablynumb

    comfortablynumb Well-Known Member

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    Ive met a few midgets along the way, and they all are offended by different terms.

    its kind of a no win situation, and if you ask what they want to be refered as some act as if you think there is something wrong with them.

    there is... yer a dwarf or a lite person or a midget... is there a clinical term you prefer?
    lol

    one guy was very cool over it poor gu was really crippled up... he said he preferd the term "munchkin" becuse it made people so uncomfortable to hear him say it. Ive seen hi act all offended and yell "not alittle person I am a munchkin {darn} you!!"

    the speaker and the spoken to have to meet minds it seems.
     
  5. Marialys

    Marialys Proud to be a Troll!

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    You know CN... you ask an interesting question... and one that I am not sure that I can answer either.

    I have one child who is deaf. It's a fact. She can't hear. I have another one who is autistic. Again, it's a fact. I spend most of my life functioning from a wheelchair. I have a bone disease that is not related to arthritis. I have had it for just over 30 years. It's a fact of life for me and there isn't anything that I can do to change it.

    We are "normal" for ourselves and societally abnormal. Neither my children nor myself refer to ourselves as "handicapped", "disabled", "differently-abled" (what the heck ever THAT is) or what the heck ever the current PC term is... It's obvious that we are not societally normal and that's enough for us.

    If the rest of y'all need to stick a label on us might I suggest whatever our names are... You know "Mrs Smith" (or whatever) instead of talking TO the disability and identifying the disability why not identify the PERSON since there really IS a person behind every disability and it's sometimes nice to have someone ignore the disability in favor of acknowledging the PERSON that we are.
     
  6. Cheryl in SD

    Cheryl in SD Living in the Hills Supporter

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    This makes me smile. I have ET, I am not ET!

    I don't get the differently abled term either. I can't use my left hand for much of anything. I am handicapped. I work around it and do most of what you do, but by definitition I handicapped.

    The dictionary defines handicap as

    2 a : a disadvantage that makes achievement unusually difficult

    If you use the word properly, does that mean you are saying we can't achieve? NO, it just means we have to work harder to get there. I don't see stating facts as being rude or looking down on others or me. And I would rather someone say I am handicapped than call me ET!!!

    LOL

    My dh says I AM a little out there But not THAT far.
     
  7. SFM in KY

    SFM in KY Well-Known Member Supporter

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    Well, I'm 5' tall ... and most adults I know (or have known) are taller, many of them much taller, than I am. I've been referred to as short, petite, referred to variously as "short stride", not having enough "up", short on one end and various other things.

    With tongue in cheek, I now refer to my height difference as "vertically challenged" :rotfl:

    Joking aside though, I do find myself often confused with the terms with which I am familiar and have used all my life now being non-PC and other terms being preferred or even "required".
     
  8. Lisa in WA

    Lisa in WA Formerly LisainN.Idaho Supporter

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    After knowing you (online) for a while Sharon and hearing your stories and experiences, I'd have to call you a big person in a little person's body. And I mean that as a compliment (I don't think it could be taken any other way..) :)
     
  9. Peacock

    Peacock writing some wrongs Supporter

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    well, we do have PC terms for things like gay or poor.

    Gay = "alternative lifestyle." Now, obviously I know that "alternative lifestyle" means homosexual, but if I didn't, I would think of maybe someone who lives on a boat or in a convent or a treehouse or even a *homestead* ;) but not necessarily gay.

    Poor = financially challenged
    Short = vertically challenged
    Fat = plus sized, full figured, big-boned
    Blind = visually challenged
    Homeless = residentially challenged

    OK...you get the idea. :)

    On a serious note, the point of calling disabled people "differently abled" is to point out that they are still able to do many things, if not most things that "normal" people can do, and sometimes even more. For example, an autistic savant might be "disabled" in a sense, but think of Rain Man. THAT is "differently abled." A blind person may be able to hear things you can't. A person in a wheelchair may be able to bench-press twice the weight you can lift because he's focused on developing his arms.

    To answer the 2nd part of your question...

    I would not, nor would many sane people, choose to conceive a child when the chances of having one with severe medical problems are really high. But if I should get pregnant "by accident" or find out about it during the pregnancy I would not terminate that pregnancy. Doctors have been wrong about such things, and "differently abled" people are often the most wonderful human beings to ever grace the planet.
     
  10. Christine in OK

    Christine in OK Well-Known Member Supporter

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    I have to say I completely agree with you this time, numb. I am clueless to the "differently abled" term and find it absolutely ludicrous. I find a lot of other "PC" terms downright stupid. I don't want to call someone something insulting or downright mean, but geez.
     
  11. AngieM2

    AngieM2 Big Front Porch advocate

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    Don't you mean "intellectually challenged"? :) :shrug: :angel:

    Angie
     
  12. heather

    heather Well-Known Member

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    this is just silly -

    We are all "differently abled"
    We all have different abilities!!!

    The phrase means absolutely nothing!! :rolleyes:
     
  13. Ed K

    Ed K Well-Known Member

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    CN,

    I agree the terms seem to change quickly and I hope when I offend someone by not using their preferred terminology they forgive me for not being entirely up to date with the terms d'jour.

    When I think of it however, If I was planning to meet someone and we hadn't seen each other before, If possible I'd avoid describing myself to them in case our perceptions differed. Easier to say "I'll be wearing a red baseball hat" or "I'll carry a sign with your name" than to trust the accuracy of my description of myself. (OK you're probably guessing that I'm older, larger and uglier than I would like to admit to) Describing people in other ways than by their limitations or describing them as objectively as possible probably can keep you from getting caught up in the terminology.

    I have an adult friend who has had Rheumatoid Arthritis since she was 2 and has noticible difficulty walking and picking things up. She made me laugh one day when she referred to my condition (which I consider "normal") as "Temporarily Able Bodied" I hadn't heard that one before and it's probably accurate. I guess I could have taken offense to it if I wanted to but I don't.
     
  14. Peacock

    Peacock writing some wrongs Supporter

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    True, we all have different abilities. But some of us need a little more help than others to remember that about ourselves and stay positive about what we CAN do instead of what we can't.

    Regardless of whether or not you agree that the term makes logical sense, at least consider that it is kind.
     
  15. FiddleKat

    FiddleKat Mother,Artist, Author Supporter

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    First off.....having a child with a handicapped, and developmentally delayed. The word "handicapped" doens't bother me. She's in a wheelchair. The phrase "mentally retared" however, causes me to cringe, because most often some people use it as a derogitory name and associate it with being stupid.
    My daughter is delayed in certain areas of development. Like she is still learning to feed herself, and because she doens't walk can't tell if she has to go or not, so is still in diapers.
    I don't like the phrase "mentally retared" for her, because she is in fact a bright child who understands what you are saying to her. And there are plenty of times her father and I will tell her no and she will do it anyway and then preceed with a grin on her face when she does it. She comprehends quite a bit.

    Regarding the part I have you quoted as above, to each his own. It's a personal thing. No one but God could decide on something like that anyway.
    I can tell you my daughter's disability is rare, and the chance for us to have it happening again is pretty nil.
     
  16. SFM in KY

    SFM in KY Well-Known Member Supporter

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    Thanks ... and I have to admit I was late into my 20s before I really believed I was NOT 10 feet tall and bulletproof!

    However, I also must confess that I never found being blonde and petite a handicap. In fact I actually found it quite useful at times ... most people tended to underestimate me unless they knew me very well.

    And in later years, I've found that my "sweet little old lady" persona works quite well, especially here in more or less rural Kentucky ... and where the local people haven't know me for years and years!

    I've always been a great believer in the old adage "whatever works!" ...
     
  17. bostonlesley

    bostonlesley Guest

    I use a cane and a powerchair..as far as I'm concerned, I'm "handicapped" and/or "disabled"..it actually irks me to hear the term "differently abled"..I don't need anyone's softening down of reality in order to somehow "make me feel better"..or is that to make them feel better? I lose track..Saying that I am "differently-abled" is kind of like ignoring the 250 pound powerchair that's in the room..ROFLOL..oh yes, it's different all right. God save me from PC-speak.
     
  18. Tracy Rimmer

    Tracy Rimmer CF, Classroom & Books Mod Supporter

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    My son is learning challenged.

    I don't use this term to make anyone else feel better about him, I don't use this term because "mentally disabled" is inaccurate. Despite common belief, I really don't give a rats behind what anyone thinks of the terminology I use, or he uses, or how it makes anyone (other than him) feel.

    I use this term because I don't ever want him to use his issues as an excuse to justify the phrase "I can't". He CAN. He is ABLE, not UNABLE... it just takes more work, more effort, and sometimes a LOT of creativity, to get done what other kids manage in half the time, with half the investment.

    It's his attitude towards life that I'm shaping with my "politically correct terminology". In all honesty, it doesn't matter to me how others view it -- it's a tool for him, and that's all. I refuse to allow him a "societal crutch" -- he MUST learn to do for himself. If the terminology that is used to describe his unique issues is positive, rather than negative, you BET that that makes a difference, especially when he would dearly love to be able to give up and say "I can't".

    I'm not going to be here for his entire life, and I am not raising a quitter, despite his challenges. He may take longer to learn, we may have to find unique ways of getting concepts through to him, but he WILL learn, and his attitude towards his abilities is a huge part of that.

    My elder son sometimes calls his brother "Captain Oblivious". He can be ENTIRELY oblivious to things -- but I refuse to use terms like "disabled" in describing his issues in front of him. These kids have challenges that mainstream society has no clue about, and attitude DOES matter.
     
  19. Christine in OK

    Christine in OK Well-Known Member Supporter

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    "Captain Oblivious" - I like that!! Probably because I have one that fits very well into that category, and he has no problems learning or keeping up in class on any level. He just gets very focused to the point of shutting out everything around him. I understand, because I used to do the same thing (still do sometimes, much to the annoyance of my husband).
     
  20. Sharon in NY

    Sharon in NY Well-Known Member

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    Ok, I have a child with a disability, or a handicap, or whatever you want to call it, and frankly, I don't care what (polite) thing you say.

    But I admit, I think this whole "oh, it is so hard to figure out what people want to be called" thing is a bunch of nonsense - ask. Ask politely. But it is always the polite thing to refer to people the way they would choose to be referred to - period. So if you don't know, ask. If you forget, apologize and ask to be reminded. Problem solved. All done. Who cares if you prefer a different term - the idea is to treat people with courtesy.

    I think fixating on whether terminology is "pc" or perfectly accurate in every way, or whatever is mostly a way of getting in little digs at other people, because they are *so* much more preoccupied with the superficial. Well, sometimes people have reasons for preferring a term - because it sounds better to them, or has a specific cultural resonance, or is more accurate, or makes them feel better. And I personally think it is petty to bash them for preferring to choose the terms that they are spoken of in.

    Just like it is perfectly reasonable for someone to prefer to be called "Mr. Johnson" rather than "Andy" or "Sir" instead of "Hey you," (or vice versa), I think it is rather unkind to sit around complaining about the way people refer to themselves. If you like a different word, feel free to use it when applied to yourself. Otherwise, get over it.

    Sharon