For the first time in nearly three years I found myself asking, why I do this self - reliance stuff. It was a long day, made longer by guinea hens that would not shut up (for the past two nights). My Catahoula alerts to problems, so apparently they're just flustered at 1, 2, 3, and 4 am. My order of 1200 chicks came in and I've been saving my town errands because of the price of gas, so I fed the animals and left. I had very limited cash so no groceries were purchased (even though I needed some). I bought two sacks of feed, dropped off the electric payment, picked up my chicks, and drove past Subway, really hungry and really wanting a tasty sub... but no cash. Came home put the chicks up in brooders- took three hours- watered the pigs again, brought in the eggs, threw out the rabbit feed that got soaked in the feeders last night in the storm (first storm in ages, we're having a drought). My stomach was growling. My right foot ached the entire time because I stepped on a nail yesterday. My hands have a multitude of tiny cuts from daily work. I'm sunburned from fixing a pen yesterday early in the morning. I take a cold water shower -turned off the water heater a week ago to save on the bill. Sit down for a little lunch around 4. Notice about 50 chicks have found a way out of their makeshift brooder so I run out and get them back in. Sweating. It is 95 degrees outside and a refreshing 90 in my house because I don't use the a/c. My son wants to spend the summer at his grandmother's so he can have a summer job (a worthy cause but I will miss him). My daughter will be off to university in a couple of months. My partner works out of town all week to pay the bills. My own bills are lagging. Today I felt like I might as well be living in a third world country. Tell me again why self reliance is a good way of life?
Oh Marcia! I'm sorry it was such a bad day! I don't know what to say. You're place sounds much bigger than mine, and I'd be weeping like a baby right now! I sure wish I could come and help out to give you a break. Can you manage a cool bath and a nice quiet book or a movie when things calm down tonight? You ARE doing a great job! There are not many people who could take on so much alone. Hang in there. Tomorrow is a new day (except for the guinea hen, I imagine, if she doesn't shut up tonight!).
Turn on the water heater long enough to get a hot bath with lots of bubbles. Have a bowl of icecream. Curl up with a good book and go to bed early. Everything will be better in the morning.
Did you know that mood swings are a sign of low blood sugar? As a diabetic, I know this well. Marcia, I don't care if you eat a bread sandwich, at noon you MUST eat SOMETHING! Your first, best tool is your healthy body, and it DESERVES your care! The chicks COULD have waited for another half hour in their packing crate while you ate. You are like a woodcutter who does not want to take the time to sharpen his ax. So, pamper yourself a little tonight and eat a generous dinner. Things will look better tomorrow. Heck, you should be able to feel a little joy in all of those chicks tomorrow! Remember to stop and admire them, you hear?
Hi Marcia, I'm sorry to hear about your day. Self-reliance is a great skill and way of life, but the day to day can really be cruddy and monotonous sometimes! It takes a lot of selflessness and strong character to be able to make sure all of your animals are safe, sound, and full-bellied, while you are hungry and hurting. The eventual payoffs of all that labor are second to none, but it sure ain't instant gratification!! Remeber to take/make the time to care for yourself. I know that sounds kind of redundant by now, but I'll bet I don't have to tell you how easy it is to forget when you're being pulled in 19 directions at once! Even if it's only a 10 minute break under a good shade tree...don't forget yourself!! Love and Light, April
I think Terri might be onto something with the low blood sugar. Long ago, I had to sit myself down and give myself a stern lecture. That lecture ran something along the lines of *what the heck good is any of it if I'm dead or half-dead from the trying to do it?* In other words, you really need to take care of yourself first. Really. I don't mean care for yourself to the neglect of everything else --- but eating is important for us hypoglycemics (which maybe you are -- ?) - even a handful of nuts makes a world of difference for me. This is hard work, but the best days are those in which you can do an entire day of really hard work and sit down at the end of it, exhausted but happy and whole. But to do that work, you have to take care of yourself. BTW, too much heat is as bad for you as just about anything --- is there any way you can come up with just a window air con, so you can keep just one room cool? I understand about not wanting the high bills, but it can be really bad for your health and wellbeing, and used ones (and often new ones) aren't that expensive. ? Just a thought. Hope things get better. Quickly.
Ok, I'm sorry, but I have to ask. What in the world do you do with 1200 chicks? what kind of birds are they? Is this a business? It sounds like a lot more then simply self reliance. And if you have the money for 1,200 chicks, why don't you have something better then a "make-shift" brooder for them? I can't begin to imagine the feed bill you have with that many birds to feed. I guess that's the trade off we all have to decide to make when we take on or continue this lifestyle, do we increase our livestock at the chance/risk of making a profit/loss and tighten our own belts to feed/house/care for the additional livestock? Or do we enjoy our lives to best of our ability, whether it's a nice soothing hot bath, or a little a/c now and then, or groceries on the pantry shelf, and not take on the added risk? Each of us has to make that decision for ourselves. I personally go for the middle of the road approach, but then, my husband works outside of the homestead so it isn't our main source of income. It is our main source of food, heating fuel, comfort, etc. Our homestead is our refuge from the world, and I want my refuge complete with a/c, heat, food, and hot water. I'll do without those things when and if I absolutely have to, but I absolutely refuse to put my cash into that much additional livestock when my family has to do without. No thanks. I do wish you luck though.
Try looking at her profile and web site before you jump to conclusions. Its obviously a business for her. As for a make-shift brooder, why NOT just have a makeshift brooder? Like you said, the chicks and feed bill are a lot of money, why blow money on something when you dont NEED to. Most things around here are makeshift. I hope the people around you are more compassionate when YOU have a bad day, sheesh.
Excuse me? If you noticed, I DID ask if this was part of her business, so if I jumped to conclusions as you call it, then I jumped to the correct one. That being said, my original point, (which you obviously missed), is that there has to be a line drawn in the sand, so to speak. We have to have our limits and our individual sacrifices that we are each willing to make. I stated that it was something we each had to decide for ourselves. I also stated that I would make other choices then she made. I never said my choices would be right for everyone. I do feel that if your business isn't paying the bills, it's time to look into something else, unless you have no problem with no hot water, no a/c, no groceries. She didn't sound like she had no problem with it. Furthermore, I didn't realize that this was a pity party forum only. I can be and am compassionate often. I am also realistic. I am not a reactive person, I like to be proactive and sometime's that comes through in my posts. I don't mean to offend anyone. I, however, never get on here simply to vent and garner sympathy. If I vent or gripe, I usually am looking for any and all solutions you good folks can think of. Also, yes, as a business, why have make-shift housing that risks your livestock? If it's a business, it would maximize profits to do it right the first time. I mean, we're talking 1,200 chicks here. Anyway, just my opinion.
Thank you everyone for the kind replies. I really needed some encouragement and you were there for me. Last night I just relaxed and read these forums and surfed the net. I was exhausted and though the guineas were still at it by the time I zoned out, I slept all the way through the night and feel much better now with my wonderful cup of coffee in hand this morning Terri and cg, you two are right on about the low blood sugar. I let eating go for too long and didn't even realize that was dragging me down to the depths I got. I've never been diagnosed with hypoglycemia but juvenile diabetes runs in my family and I see the wild behavior and mood swings in my son when he has too much breakfast cereal and juice. I know I go up an down myself and really need to keep better track of that. Thank you Shygal for coming to my aid TQB, I run a small sole propietorship from my home. I sell day-old chicks to reptile keepers. Something has been upsetting my hens and they were not laying in the nest boxes until two weeks ago again. I think the drought has brought some predators to our pond during the day. I've seen a lot of snakes lately. However, no eggs meant I was behind for a couple of very good customers- I hatch about 400 a month- so I purchased chicks from Mt. Healthy- more than I needed to cover the orders in case something else happened. I highly recommend their Bargain #2 for anyone in need of a large amount of chicks at an unbeatable price. I immediately gased and packed and froze 800 chicks to fulfill my orders and since Mt. Healthy sent me 300 Buff Orphingtons and several dozen pullet RI Reds and Barred Rocks I kept them as replacement hens for my own. I have two professional GQF brooders where I put approx 300 chicks yesterday and I made a brooder outside in the goat pen for the remainder- those little ones were getting out. I could have put them in the water troughs I used to use as brooders before I got the GQF's but I didn't want to deal with the wood chips in the drinking water several times a day. I wish I could sex the Buffs, but I don't know how to. Don't need 300 but I could make a little cash on them if I have about 10% pullets which is the usual ratio of females in cockerel orders. Anyone know how to sex Buff Orphingtons's?
Oh geez, Marcia...after listening to too much hip-hop music on a satalite radio station while working in the garden yesterday, I could give you some suggestions, but I don't think they would be appropriate!! :haha: I have to agree with Shygal...you started by saying that for the first time in 3 years, you were questioning why you were doing this. We are all entitled to have a lousy day from time to time, and to be able to simply vent about it without being critiqued about lifestyle choices. (I think there might have been someone posting here who didn't get enough hugs as a little girl! ) Like you said, you got it off your chest, relaxed, and all is well! Keep fighting the good fight!! Sorry I coun't be more helpful with the Buff question!! April :dance:
I hope "thequeensblessing" is there for me when I have an off day...I could always count on my mother to tell it like it was and give me a reality check when my low blood sugar did my thinking for me (she's been gone 10 years and I miss her sanity more and more). Sometimes we need all kinds of responses so we can mix them together and get just the right dose of sympathy and reality.
Thanks April It is in perspective today. There are people on this forum who are absolutely golden. The kind of neighbors one could rely on in hardship in the olden days. the kind that just helped. I appreciate it
Your mother may have been tuned into you. I can tell when my children are having bad days and when they need a little "talk," from someone who loves them more than anything. I didn't mind the criticism of tqb; I was only having a bad day.
Marcia, Glad you're feeling better today. I've had those days where I just wanted to sit down and cry. I know you're saving money on electric, but when you've had a bad day you at least deserve to be cool and comfortable for a while. If you have a fan that you could set in front of you, after you get out of the shower and turn it on, it would cool you off pretty quickly. I remember a huge fan my parents had and my cousin used it as a blow dryer for his hair in the morning - back in the 60's that was the only kind of blow dryer there was. Also, the one-room AC is a good idea - it could be used to cool one room shut off from the rest, maybe the bedroom. That way you could cool off and take a nap. The world looks much better when your rested and comfortable. Do something for yourself sometimes - rewarding yourself occasionally makes self-reliance much more bearable!! Hope today is wonderful for you! Vickie
Thanks Vickie- I do tend to put myself at the end of "the list of things to do," if I'm there at all. I have ceiling fans always turned on to move the air around. Last year when I got hot I just jumped into the pond but this year the water table is so low that the water has gotten some algae and I don't dare jump in. I keep myself hydrated with water or iced tea all day long. I almost always have a glass in my hand. Two days ago at the start of the storms, the days started to cool off a little :worship: . I only turn the a/c on if we have company and that has been two weekends in a row and this weekend my family is coming for a roast . I have to say that I am also exhausted. We had a butchering marathon this last weekend and killed our 400 pound sow and our very first buckling (which, needless to say was an emotional odyssey for me, but it was something that had to be done). Looking back at yesterday I can see several things went awry. Almost the proverbial straw... and you are all right. I need to watch out for that. It was stupid not to see it coming.
Thanks, I think! Although I sure didn't mean to come across as anyone's mom. Maybe that's my problem, I'm stuck in that mom/grandma mode right now. Maybe I'm the one who needed the reality check! Look guys, I give out what I would love to get from you all. Very often I will need the proverbial kick in the pants, and if I can't get that from my fellow homesteaders who can I get it from? (Besides my DH, he's always willing!) I don't vent simply to vent because I find it to be pointless. As I said, I tend to be proactive and I feel that there is a solution to ever problem, sometime's they are just harder to find is all. That's when I turn to my friends and fellow homesteaders, to help me find it. I'm sorry if I came across harsh or sharp, although I can't say I'm sorry for what I said, because it is truly how I view things. I should probably learn to be the kind of person who just reads the rant and offers a cyber hug, and then just keeps my mouth shut, but at my advanced age, (I'm a whopping 42), I'm afraid I'm too darned stuck in my ways. What I said, I said with the best of intentions. Some of ya have mighty thin skin though!
Marcia, I used to be that way too, but I realized I'm pretty important to my family so, if I don't stop and take care of myself I could end up very sick - which by the way we can't afford - or possibly not here at all, that won't work there's just too much to do! :haha: I read your post about killing the hogs - you have my utmost respect with all you do - I'm shocked you can stand up at the end of the day! I have hypoglycemia and low blood-pressure and I get so sick when I don't eat that it's just not worth it. Better off spending .89 at Taco Bell or some such, and getting a burrito and a cup of ice water to fend of the drop in blood sugar. Take care of yourself, that's who you count on. And your partner and family deserve to have you around for a long time! Hope your weekend goes well, it sounds like fun! Vickie
Mom modes have no age limit (I'm actually older than you) but it is a much needed mode when our blood sugar is out of whack. Feel free to tell me like it is anytime....I don't always have the patience for the beat-around-the -bush approach!
