New ideas about eating out!

Discussion in 'Homesteading Questions' started by Queen Bee, Apr 7, 2005.

  1. Queen Bee

    Queen Bee Well-Known Member Supporter

    Messages:
    6,700
    Joined:
    Apr 6, 2004
    Location:
    NC
    I need help. I have a great job--I working with the aging.. I have a 85yr. female who is very active.. We go to the symphony, theaters, classic concerts, movies,any art or music event within 50 miles, walk almost everyday(at her pace not mine), do lots and lots of window shopping BUT we eat out EVERY day(sometimes twice a day). She is very wealth, never has cooked at home--been alone for almost 30yrs She will not let me cook for her, even if it's just a snack or to do a salad.... She wants to be going and doing all the time. Says she's "not gonna miss anything!" She pays for everything except my lunches.. These are not cheap places--I spend an average of 12$ plus tips(soup, salad or sandwich) for lunches and when we go out in the evenings it's much more like 30$ +tip. Not only does it eat away at my money, I have gained a lot of weight.. I need help--I try very hard to choose something that will nbt be full of fat and other bad things--salads, soups and they don't seem to help with my weight.I but my cholestorel (SP) is sky high also... Any suggestions, How I can live to be 84 and stay healthy and active!?? IF I keep eating like this I will be gone in a few yrs...Thanks debbie :no:
     
  2. Terri

    Terri Singletree & Weight Loss & Permaculture Moderator Staff Member Supporter

    Messages:
    14,700
    Joined:
    May 10, 2002
    Location:
    Kansas
    An actress who traveled a lot had a good solution. She left half of her meal on her plate every time she ate out.

    Then again, if you MOSTLY eat out once a day you can eat the other half for another meal....or even (GASP) throw it out!

    And, at a few places I have been known to eat an appetizer and a salad for lunch. Shrimp cocktail and a side salad with croutons is very nice. The only trouble is it sometimes arrives first, even if you explain it is your lunch because you are watching your weight! ;)
     

  3. MorrisonCorner

    MorrisonCorner Mansfield, VT for 200 yrs

    Messages:
    3,736
    Joined:
    Jul 27, 2004
    Location:
    VT
    I work with scholars who come to us from Great Britian and one of the things they find most difficult to adjust to is the American idea of "portion size." Which is roughly 3x what they are used to seeing on their plates. Most of them put on significant weight in their first year here. The ones who don't are very disciplined, and do exactly as Terri suggests. When the meal arrives, they immediately divide it in two, sliding half to another plate or to one side.

    And they're not shy about asking for doggie bags!

    I find that I can make a dinner out of a side salad and an appetizer plate, it is just insane what most restaurants slap on a plate as a "serving."

    However, the real issue here is that this is tearing a hole in your budget. I assume you don't have any private time where you could munch down a sandwich then have coffee to be sociable as you "join her" for lunch? I'm assuming that saying 'I can't afford this' is not really an option because it puts you in an uncomfortable position. Could you try snacking lightly at mid-morning and mid-afternoon with tea or coffee for lunch?

    You really are in a pickle if "entertaining" is part of your job and you're expected to pick up the full freight for it. However, you might want to consult with a tax advisor. If these meals are part of your job they may be partially tax deductable.
     
  4. wildwanderer

    wildwanderer Momma, Goatherder etc....

    Messages:
    400
    Joined:
    Mar 2, 2004
    Location:
    Arkansas
    I have at times been in company of those who had more fiancial resources who enjoyed eating at resturants. I have either amused myself some other way while they ate, I go to a park and read or window shop in the immediate vicinity. Or if they complain about the lack of companionship just have a drink while they eat (or a cup of soup this is usually under 3 dollars) - then eat later on my own. If she has a problem with this explain to her you have other goals with your income then to spend 45 dollars a day on meals. (I spend less then 45 dollars a week on my foodbill and thats for three people and a dog) My current boss has finally gotten it through her head, that I will run out and get her lunch and she shouldn't feel guilty that I will do this (I definitely would not do this for every boss but my current ones are great). I personally would rather eat what I bring (such as mom's goolash, or my dinner leftovers, or if I am lucky stew and homemade bread - I have always enjoyed my cooking more then anyone elses). She now offers to buy my lunch when I go out and get her something, and understands when I refuse it with no hard feelings.
    Good luck it is hard to be different or feel odd in public but after a few years you know what you want to do and who you want to be so actually doing it in public becomes the hardpart. But you got to figure your the lucky one because most people never figure out who they want to be and even less actually do it.
    Take care - Thea
     
  5. Jan Doling

    Jan Doling Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    4,898
    Joined:
    May 21, 2004
    Location:
    Zone 9b
    Order soup or appetiser only. Who wants to live to 84 if they've already spent all their money "keeping up with the Joneses" while dining out?