Midlife crisis

Discussion in 'General Chat' started by Oregon1986, Jan 10, 2018.

  1. Forcast

    Forcast Well-Known Member

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    We reset ourselves every 7 years. Hormone s might have a lot todo with how you feel right now.
     
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  2. CajunSunshine

    CajunSunshine Joie de vivre!

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    Ha ha! Having spent the first half of my life in the New Orleans area (city AND bayou country), I got the heat, skeeters, snakes and bugs down pat. Now I just want to be in the company of a few hundred red eyed tree frogs...they are so photogenic!




    [​IMG]
     
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  3. Yvonne's hubby

    Yvonne's hubby Murphy was an optimist ;) Staff Member

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    LOL!! I really should pay closer attention to who I'm talking to and where they reside! Normally I just read the post and respond accordingly. Sorry bout that. :)
     
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  4. hunter63

    hunter63 Well-Known Member

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    Suggestion to the OP....
    Buy the Harley and get it over with....LOL
     
  5. PlayingInDirt

    PlayingInDirt Well-Known Member

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    I was thinking about starting some rabbits for the fertilizer too! Let me add to the 3 miles long list, 1/4 mile down. Haha!

    I think we should all be invited to the wedding, and I just might show up too.
     
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  6. Oregon1986

    Oregon1986 Well-Known Member

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    Lol how about I pull a Britney Spears and just shave my head. Jk
     
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  7. Oregon1986

    Oregon1986 Well-Known Member

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    I'd invite you all,lol. We are talking about when we do get married,having it on our property. Nice small farm wedding
     
  8. Oregon1986

    Oregon1986 Well-Known Member

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    According to SO I been extremely hormonal since getting my tubes tied and getting off birth control
     
  9. Lisa in WA

    Lisa in WA Formerly LisainN.Idaho Supporter

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    That sounds like mansplaining. Is he still unconscious? How hard did you smack him?
    :)
     
  10. Terri

    Terri Singletree & Weight Loss & Permaculture Moderator Staff Member Supporter

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    He should count his blessings. *HE* could have been the one with the tied tubes!
     
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  11. Yvonne's hubby

    Yvonne's hubby Murphy was an optimist ;) Staff Member

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    It could also just be "doctorsplaining". Hormones can play a vital role in a woman's emotional well being. And a mans physical well being if he dares mention the subject to his spouse when those hormones are out of whack!! Don't ask how I learned this! ;)
     
    Last edited: Jan 14, 2018 at 3:29 AM
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  12. Jolly

    Jolly Well-Known Member

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  13. Pschmidt

    Pschmidt Member

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    I kinda had one after my former hubby passed away in 2012. Fought stage 4 cancer for 2 years, he was barely 40, best man I ever knew (besides my daddy). I was 41 and just didn't care about anything anymore. Grieved, drank too much, got fired from jobs, lost everything or gave it away, decided to hit the road and lived out of a van for a while. Took stock. I will thank the road for that. Having nothing except what's in your van was liberating. Really focused on what's really important in life, there had to be meaning out there, right? If only I could find it.

    Took me 5 years but I'm finally past that. What matters? To me, it's the people and your relationships with those people. I'm extremely picky on who I choose to give my time and energy to. It's also your place in the world. All that 'stuff' out there is just that: stuff. And I don't want it, it wasn't me. I want my own little world, if you will. My place, my sanctuary. My freedom from this weird world. Decided the best blend is making my world as far removed from the misery of normal thinkers, yet staying close enough to keep the people that matter to me nearby. Decided to make roots.

    Fast forward to now. Never thought I would be, but I remarried recently. New husband, new stepson. My first grandbaby was born last year, I was in the room for it. What a blessing!!! My daughter's little family live 2 hours from me, not great, but not bad, either. Decided to go back to school, have been going a year already, will graduate a year from May. Aiming to get a remote job and do that til we save up enough to cover the monthly expenses from the interest, which will take some years, yes. Years I'm looking forward to, now. Those years I plan on getting the homestead going. Learning as much as I can. Make mistakes.

    Man, didn't mean to write a book, sorry. Just that, I know the feeling. Mid-life crisis, go for it!! :) Bring it! You will probably learn and grow from it!! :)
     
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  14. mreynolds

    mreynolds Well-Known Member

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    That sounds like something I would end up doing. Just hit the road.
     
  15. hunter63

    hunter63 Well-Known Member

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    After using up 6-7 of my 9 lives personally...... I stick to bigger 4 wheel vehicles these days
    The Harley statement was a metaphor for "just go ahead and do it (plug in your own current wishes)...."

    You know you want to......but the practical side have been yelling at you 'NO'.... the "wild and crazy side" prodding you to the YES...then add in "Time is running" ......
     
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  16. lmrose

    lmrose Well-Known Member

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    Hi; You didn't mention where you live or how many children you have? If you live in a Northern part of any country where days are shorter and sun less; you might be experiencing depression brought on by a lack of vitamin D. I have to take it in the winter myself.
    Also I remember in my twenties being alone with four children to raise and having those feelings of not being able to do what I wanted. I felt trapped in a life that wasn't what I had planned or expected. All my dreams of having my own little farm were shattered and it looked hopeless.
    But then I looked at my kids and realized they didn't ask to be born. I wanted a family and they deserved all of me as a mother and they were all that mattered. My dreams and wants were secondary now. But someday these children would grow up and have lives of their own and then it would be my turn to choose how to live my life.
    Life has a way of putting up obstacles to the path we want to travel. I had plenty of things to over come and it has taken a lot to persevere . Through it all both my husband and I kept planning for when we would be free to live the way we wanted.
    I wish we were 32 yrs and 33 yrs now instead of almost 72 and 73 yrs! So I say to you even though you feel life is passing you by it really isn't. You are just on a detour right now. You are definitely not old yet ! Keep planning what you want to do so when you are able you will be ready. At our age we have more time behind us and less in front but we will carry out our plans as long as we are able. This life is a temporary journey not a final destination. But I intend to live it the best I can for as long as I can while I am here. Hope you feel better soon.
     
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  17. Oregon1986

    Oregon1986 Well-Known Member

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    Thank you this made me feel a lot better.. I live in Oregon where it rains a lot
     
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  18. lmrose

    lmrose Well-Known Member

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    Good Morning; Hopefully you will continue to feel better. Being inside in rainy weather is a good time to spend time with that adorable little boy I see in the picture. Do you have other children? I missed a lot of days enjoying my four kids because of struggles I was going through at the time. I regret that because those young years can't be retrieved. Later we did have 18 years to enjoy our grandson living with us. I made sure we had plenty of time playing together. By three he played checkers and simple card games with me. Later it was Monopoly and scrabble. At sixteen he taught me about video games. We hiked in the woods and went sledding on hills in the winter . He played on a soft ball team from 7 yrs. to 12 yrs old and we walked for miles to get to various ball fields. He went in the woods with Papa that he called my husband and learned the names of trees. They were good years but went by too fast. I was in my forties and fifties raising him.

    When I was alone raising four kids it was different because we were in a city. Although I was over whelmed with problems and poverty I did take them to city parks to play and swim. I wish I could go back and spend more time with them when they were little. But this life has no dress- rehearsals. You live it once and rearing your children to become happy responsible adults is one of your greatest callings.

    That doesn't mean you can't plan and learn and prepare for when you can do other things like living in the woods. I understand that dream because it was instilled in me by listening to stories from my Grandma who raised me. She was born in 1880 and lived in a log cabin. My Dad was always looking for a better piece of land even though he had a good two acres and gardens and chickens. But he wanted more isolation which he finally got but after his three kids were grown.
    You didn't say how your partner feels about your feelings or if you ever discussed how you would like to live? Whether he wants what you want or not you can still read and acquire new skills. There is much to learn and many things you can do no matter if you live in a city, town apartment, house or live in the country. On this forum and others there is so much information about skills to learn that will benefit you no matter where you live. If you focus on your children and learning new things it will help you and maybe your children will enjoy learning with you. I hope you will find peace and happiness in what you already have until you can have what you desire. I always remind myself of this. The past is called such because it is gone. The future we don't know because it hasn't arrived. I live in today which is a gift called the present. Have a nice day.
     
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  19. HDRider

    HDRider Well-Known Member

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    Very uplifting story. I am glad you are happy.
     
  20. haypoint

    haypoint Unpaid, Volunteer Devil's Advocate Supporter

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    Perhaps the gift of mid-life is perspective. I am young enough to be full of life, but experienced enough to temper my idealism; vital enough to enjoy a spark of chemistry, but wise enough to no longer major in it. I learn from the past with forgiveness, cherish the present with gratitude, and work toward the future with vision.
     
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