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She sounds uneducated...I don't blame you for being angry, but the truth of it is that she probably has been on coping/survival mode for so long that she hasn't been able to learn how to improve her conditions. Well, and if she's been on drugs....

My advice is to do one of two things:

Get out of this mess as fast as you can, including the dogs.

Or, if you like people, take her under your wing. Health and Welfare has programs for wom en like this (oh wait, you said they are trying to take her baby away, she must have fouled up on the drug test or something). She probably had a lousy mother who was a druggie herself and didn't provide any example of housekeeping or teach her daughter. Knowing how to keep house doesn't just magically fall on your head, you have to learn it.

I wouldn't do her any favors at all unless she'll meet you halfway. For example, you can agree to take her to town a set number of days a week if she will help you around the house (your house). This way she will be learning how to do it, but it won't be like you're directly criticizing her housekeeping, she'll start to develop the skills and want to keep her own place nice too.

As a welfare mother, she runs the risk of becoming a user, it's very easy to do. And people, please don't bash me for saying that, I've been on welfare myself before...but I have seen people who lose all their independence skills and just expect life to be handed to them.
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
Chamoisee, I'm sorry for this mix up. Thanks for your reply. I answered it in CF. I will say however since we are talking about mucky situations here, that the compost is working out beautifully now and I am using it on the plants. The tomatoes are looking healthier too! :)
 
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