Good bye

Discussion in 'Goats' started by famer_manda, Apr 24, 2006.

  1. famer_manda

    famer_manda I Love CHICKENS!

    Apr 4, 2005
    I am writing to give an update and to say goodbye. I stayed up until 4am just pulling and trying all that I could. I couldn't get the baby out and I could not put her back in. We put the goat down. The baby wasn't alive and the baby wouldn't budge. The baby goat was so large that it could not pass anything besides legs through the pelvis. It was a single one and it was nearly the size of what some of you have showed with your regular newborn baby goats from alpines.

    We still opened her up to make sure there wasn't another goat in there that we could bottle feed but there was just the one. It was huge. It could not have been born no matter how much I had tried.

    I just remind all of you of this, if you have pygmy goats PLEASE make sure they are not bred with a large goat. I bought mine already pregnant and I am very upset with the man who was so negligent as to allow them to all run together. If we had known prior to kidding that she definately had been bred with a large goat then we could have done something better.

    Im heartbroken in a really bad way today and I realize I need some time away from these boards. Im sure some of you even hate me today. Im sorry. Im sorry for failing my girl. I failed my daughter too. What should have been such a wonderful memory between us ended up in tears, sorrow and heartache. We prayed, we begged but alas, we failed. It would be too hard for me to be here and hear how everything goes well for others. I am just not cut out for goats I guess. I need to go replace the one I lost because my other goat is probably heartbroken now too. They were sisters. It is the least I can do for her but no, no prregnant ones. I just cannot handle all of that again.

    I wrote an email to the person i bought my goat from to explain what happened. Its just a sad sad shame.

  2. HilltopDaisy

    HilltopDaisy Well-Known Member Supporter

    Feb 26, 2003
    New York
    Amanda, such a horrible thing to have to go through..... I'm very sorry for your loss. Spoil your other goat, get her a friend, and most importantly don't blame yourself. The person who sold you this goat should be ashamed.

  3. mpillow

    mpillow Well-Known Member Supporter

    Jan 24, 2003
    I'm sorry this was your experience...

    But I'm curious if you were feeding this doe grain while pregnant? I ask because grain during pregnancy (in lg. quantity) can lead to big babies.....I only feed hay while prego until I see goop on the tail and a very full udder....I had a delivery that started similar to yours but was able to reach in and get head and pull with contraction....from a small nubian bred to a largish buck...I also helped with the second on which was a nose and a hoof presentation....I had done alot of reading about non-typical births and had my mind set that I COULD/WOULD handle it....and I prayed out loud for courage and wisdom while helping to birth the babies.... :angel:
  4. moosemaniac

    moosemaniac Well-Known Member

    Mar 7, 2003
    North East, PA in Northwestern PA
    Having lost a doe after a c-section last year during my first ever kidding, I can absolutely relate here. Take some time, catch your breath, but come back...don't give up.

  5. myheaven

    myheaven Well-Known Member Supporter

    Apr 13, 2006
    I for one dont hate you you did your best and this was one of your fears from the other post. The person who sold you the goat was negligent. I am very sorry you all had to go threw this. I cant believe that person woould allow such a thig to happen. I was up most of the night praying for you. I couldnt sleep. I am very sorry this has happened. I know its hard to think of but this is a learning experiance(sp) you have taught us all. Im so sorry.
  6. homebirtha

    homebirtha Well-Known Member

    Feb 19, 2004
    Oh no. I'm so sorry to hear this. I don't think anyone here could possibly hate you. We were upset when you said you were going to bed. But you didn't. You stayed with her. You tried everything you could. And you made the really really hard decision (but the right and merciful one) to put her down. You did the best you could.

    Please be easy on yourself and give yourself time to recover from this. Take care.
  7. mammawof3

    mammawof3 Well-Known Member

    Jan 30, 2004
    I am so sorry that you had to go through that. Luckily, kidding "horrers" are the EXCEPTION rather than the rule! Really, i have raised goats for quite a few years. I can understand that you are feeling like you let your doe down, while this may have been one of those times that experience could have helped, sometimes there really IS nothing else that can be done, except what you did do-putting her out of her misery!! My very first "kidding" as a mom (although i had goats growing up myself)-was too get a 3 &5 year old, up out of bed, to come see their babies get born-too have 2 STILLBORNS! i can relate to THAT part also. It is sad, but also gives the lesson of just how precious life kids went on to experience hundreds of "happy" births.
    Just take some time off, realize that chances are, it will never happen to you again! Take care. :angel:
  8. Goat Freak

    Goat Freak Slave To Many Animals

    Jul 6, 2005
    Amanda, I am SO sorry. I think that you should probly get a nice doe that is NOT a pygmy, maybe a nigerian, I have heard all kinds of stories about pygmies having problems, although this one is flat out neglect on the part of the person you bought her from. Pygmies have problems for some reason, being barrel shaped with big heads is the way I've heard it, nigerians have an easier time the way I've heard it. Good Luck, and DON'T give up, I've made lots of mistakes that have caused LOTS of losses, mostly because I was uninformed or forgot something. By the way, there is NO WAY on earth that anyone here is going to hate you, if so they should be ashamed, YOU did NOTHING wrong, it was the person that you bought her from that is to blame. Good Luck, we'll be here for ya when ya come back, if ya do. Good Luck. Bye.
  9. tltater

    tltater Well-Known Member

    Jul 13, 2004
    I hope you come back at least long enough to read these posts.

    I am sooo proud of you. You didn't give up and when the time came to put the doe down, you did it. It's not an easy decision. Alot of people wouldn't be able to make than decision themselves. You did what you needed to do and for that I am soo proud of you.

    Please do not beat yourself up over this. We are all learning everyday in every situation. We are not perfect nor are our animals. We can only do what we can.....that's it.

    Take care of yourself and come back when you can. We'll all still be here ready to hear about your new companion for your other goat.

    Southwestern, NY
  10. fricknfarm

    fricknfarm Well-Known Member

    Apr 4, 2006
    Shake it off. There was really nothing YOU could have done. I always feed my pregnant goats some grain and have never had a kid too large to pass. I'm sure it was too large. It happens in every animal now and then. I've had my best luck with dairy goats. Try them. easier to raise I think. People think of goats as indestructible, they're not. Do try again. Try to find someone in your area selling privately. You'll be sure to see what you're getting. Just like going to a breeder for a pup.
  11. Sweet Goats

    Sweet Goats Cashmere goats

    Nov 30, 2005
    Amanda, PLEASE do NOT beat yourself up for this. This happens tho people that have kidding for years. If anything I give you MORE credit, I really don't know that I could of put the mom down. really you did EVERYTHING that you could of. I have a Pygmy breeder friend that has lost 7 moms and 12 babies this year because the babies are just way to big. Hers are all registered so I personally think that they are trying to breed for those babies to be way to large, so PLEASE give yourself a pat on the back for everything that you did do. Please take these hugs {{{{{{{}}}}}}} from me here in CO. I will be praying for you.
  12. GoldenWood Farm

    GoldenWood Farm Legally blonde! Supporter

    May 31, 2003
    Oh Amanda I am so sorry :Bawling: :Bawling: :Bawling: :Bawling: . I am no expert but in my book you did the best thing you could and kept your head on your shoulders. I don't think that many new people to goats could have done that. You did all you could and in the end you made the best choice for her. That in its self was the most difficult thing you could have done but it was the best thing to do for her.

    DO NOT BEAT YOUR SELF UP! Thats an order :nono: . You have nothing to beat your self up about. There is no way you knew she was pregnent to a larger goat, no way you could have known how big that baby was really and you did everything you could do to save momma and baby. In my 2 years of birthing goats I only had to assist one older doe with the birth.

    Don't give up hun....I am so sorry you lost your gal. My first goat I ever got I lost within a few months and that WAS my own fault. She ended up being put down as it was the best thing for her. She was in so much pain that to keep her alive or try anything would have been more cruel and harmful to her than helping her. I now have about 20 goats even after that happened. But it was over time...and I loved my one goat I had still. But I can understand the downtime you need. Hugs and prayers coming your way from Oregon :Bawling: .

    ps: sorry for such a long post....
  13. Laura Workman

    Laura Workman (formerly Laura Jensen) Supporter

    May 10, 2002
    Lynnwood, Washington
    Oh, I am so sorry to hear it went so badly. I am completely with Homebirtha on this. We've all had difficult times and, like you, we stayed with the goat trying everything we possibly could. Sometimes, like you, we can't save them, and it always just tears your heart out. I'm so sorry! When I first read the thread, I was thinking, and said to my husband, "I really hope she's not dealing with a Pygmy because they are known for birthing problems, a lot like bulldogs and pugs.

    "Large heads, narrow pelvises. That's a very bad combination for birthing," and to combine that with breeding to a standard buck??? I can't imagine how that could have gone at all well. I think you were very brave for sticking with it and doing all you did, and for making the final, incredibly painful decision. I do hope you come back. Nobody here could possibly hate you for this.
  14. Delinda

    Delinda Well-Known Member Supporter

    Dec 4, 2005
    East Tennessee
    I am so very sorry this has happened. But I agree with everyone else, you did your best and you stayed with her. Things like this happen, it is not your fault.
  15. Lindafisk

    Lindafisk Well-Known Member

    Nov 16, 2004
    I wan't even subscribed to this thread and just saw it in my inbox, once I read the post I just had to say I am so sorry for what has happened and I hope you will not blame yourself and please don't give up on the goats and plese come back to this board soon and let us know you are ok...I will be looking to see how you are. Get some rest and take a break, it will be better soon.
  16. HomesteadBaker

    HomesteadBaker Working toward the dream

    Feb 8, 2006
    Northwest PA
    I am so sorry you lost your goat and her baby.... you know you did all you could to help her.

    I do not believe there is a soul on this board that hates you.... the only emotions I derived from reading this and the other thread was the frustration of your HT friends directed at themselves because of their inability to help you in your time of need; and their deep sorrow for your loss. You did the best you could in a no win situation, and my heart goes out to you and your daughter.
  17. Farmgirl2005

    Farmgirl2005 Well-Known Member

    Jan 16, 2005
    amanda i am also so sorry to hear about what happen.. i send my deepest apologizes and understandings in your reasons to take a break...i hope everything goes wonderful in your future years with goats...
    Lyn :(
  18. Caprice Acres

    Caprice Acres AKA "mygoat" Staff Member Supporter

    Mar 6, 2005
    Is she saying goodbye to the forum?
  19. computerchick

    computerchick Keeper of the Zoo

    Jun 24, 2005
    Wow Amanda, PLEASE don't give up. I know what you are feeling right now - and the sting will pass. You went the extra mile for that doe, and there are other does out there that would love that kind of mom! I'm sure when you heal you'll be able to accept another goat in your life!

  20. susieM

    susieM Well-Known Member

    Apr 23, 2006
    I've been waiting to be allowed to begin posting, just for this thread. Such a sad story, but a 'good' ending, being as the doe was put down, and not left to suffer.

    I hope that you come here, and to goat breeding.