Etiquette

717 Views 19 Replies 15 Participants Last post by Joshie, May 13, 2010

PinkBat

Discussion Starter · May 11, 2010

My oncologist told me today that he has a new baby girl. He seemed super excited.

Would it be appropriate, or not, for me and my husband (who is also his patient) to give him a baby gift?

Are docs allowed to accept gifts?

I feel like he's part of our family since he's been keeping me and my husband alive for the last 14 months.....lol.

1 - 20 of 20 Posts

chickenista

· #2 · May 11, 2010

Sure it is appropriate.
The way I see it, if it feels ok to you and it makes you and another person happy, then it is prefectly etiquetteable

In this world there is not enough good vibes flowing around. Anything you can do to keep good vibes flowing.. you go for it.

nehimama

· #3 · May 11, 2010

I'd say "yes". Go ahead. It will make you, your hubby and your oncologist smile!

Wildwood Flower

· #4 · May 12, 2010

A small gift is always appropriate. I wouldn't do anything very expensive, just something thoughtful.

Toads tool

· #5 · May 12, 2010

One should give out of graciousness and appreciation.
Appropriatness shouldn't be an issue.

Jenn

· #6 · May 12, 2010

Docs get and accept gifts. Just nothing so big that you- or other patients- think you're bribing him to give you some sort of extra or special service. What you'd give someone as close as he is to you on such an occasion. (No handmade baby quilt unless you crank one out every week, and no silver!) I'm sure he was so happy he had to share his news and knew you'd enjoy it- you'd probably wonder what was wrong with him had he not explained!

BTW my favorite gift: cards expressing gratitude when I or patient moves on. Second favorite: gorgeous prints from my artist patients. Never got gifts from patients when I had a baby (except good advice).

winemaker

· #7 · May 12, 2010

My wife took our kids Dr. his usual Easter gift bag, fresh horse radish and homemade concord wine. We see him atleast 3 times a year for the past 15 years. He told her that small gifts were the norm years ago but over the past few years they are few and far between.

fellini123

· #8 · May 12, 2010

When I was first diagnosed with a heart condition I used to bring my cardologist apples. I would tell him "An apple a day keeps the DR away." We had a great relationship, and then he got promoted and moved away!!! Oh well. Msybe it was the apples!!!!
Never got any other Dr a gift, but I think it is a nice thing!!
Alice in virginia

Sarabeth

· #9 · May 12, 2010

EVERYBODY likes a gift!! Really, don't you think? As long as it's not extravagant, I think it is totally appropriate. You are only showing your appreciation, which I am sure doctor's nowadays don't get so much.

PinkBat

Discussion Starter · #10 · May 12, 2010

Thanks everyone. I will go ahead with the gift then. I like baby toys, so that's what I'll get.

jmtinmi

· #11 · May 12, 2010

I would try to think of something that they wouldn't be able to purchase for themselves. I like Jens Post about artwork.

How about a nice bunch of baked goods, or a meal.

PinkBat

Discussion Starter · #12 · May 12, 2010

I found something better than a toy.

A CD of Armenian lullabies.....dad is Armenian.

Joshie

· #13 · May 13, 2010

There are many places where doctors are not allowed to accept any gifts at all. You might want to ask someone in the office before giving something to your doctor. There are places where this violates policy and there are places where this might violate the law.

65284

· #14 · May 13, 2010

When we butcher every fall I take my Dr. a few slices of ham and a couple pounds of bacon, and a dozen eggs once in a while. He always seems delighted to get them.

PinkBat

Discussion Starter · #15 · May 13, 2010

Joshie said:
There are many places where doctors are not allowed to accept any gifts at all. You might want to ask someone in the office before giving something to your doctor. There are places where this violates policy and there are places where this might violate the law.

Well, I know the nurses and receptionists accept balloons, and chocolate. I gave chocolate Christmas.

Rockyshore

· #16 · May 13, 2010

When my grandmother passed we went one last time to see her GP and thank him for his great care over the years. We also brought along several childrens books for his lobby. He seemed a little shocked that we would bring the gifts, but appreciated the addition to the lobby library.

Joshie

· #17 · May 13, 2010

PinkBat said:
Well, I know the nurses and receptionists accept balloons, and chocolate. I gave chocolate Christmas.

Just make sure that it's legal and not against policy where you live. I know that I tried to give someone some Post It notes and they were unable to take it. I wasn't selling anything either. Around here it's not acceptable to give gifts to providers. It creates the appearance of giving gifts in order to receive preferential treatment.

I think it stinks but it's better to know in advance than to find out after you've purchased a gift and attempted to give it.

Oggie

· #18 · May 13, 2010

The way my doctor winds up touching me, I've kind of been wondering if it might be proper etiquette for him to buy me dinner, or perhaps a bouquet of flowers, or at least a box of chocolate.

Wags

· #19 · May 13, 2010

PinkBat said:
I found something better than a toy.

A CD of Armenian lullabies.....dad is Armenian.

What a thoughtful gift! :thumb:

Joshie

· #20 · May 13, 2010

Oggie said:
The way my doctor winds up touching me, I've kind of been wondering if it might be proper etiquette for him to buy me dinner, or perhaps a bouquet of flowers, or at least a box of chocolate.

In instances like this the patient certainly owes the doctor much more than the office visit charge. :nanner:

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