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Booklover, I don't disagree necessarily with you not spanking, but with this idea that each action on your part should be discuss and approved by a child. It seems that way to me, maybe I'm wrong, or reading it wrong. Part of growing up, is understanding that we all have authority figures, even adults. If a boss tell me to do something, and I say it's boring or I'm having a bad day....do you really think he/she is gonna "crouch to my level" and gently tell me why he feels I should do as he asks. Heck, no! He'll say "see ya"
As your daughter gets older, it might be hard for her to understand that sometimes you have to do things, simply because you must do what they say, regardless of your own feelings. I feel that teaching a child that you will do what I say, when I say ,without always having your input or opinion about everything teaching them respect. THis can be taught without or without spanking.
As far as natural consequences, that literally can go too far. As a child matures the natural conseqences for certain behavior is jail, death, unemployment and a vast array of other situations that should have been dealt with in childhood by parents.
Just my humble opinion, not meant to argue....
As your daughter gets older, it might be hard for her to understand that sometimes you have to do things, simply because you must do what they say, regardless of your own feelings. I feel that teaching a child that you will do what I say, when I say ,without always having your input or opinion about everything teaching them respect. THis can be taught without or without spanking.
As far as natural consequences, that literally can go too far. As a child matures the natural conseqences for certain behavior is jail, death, unemployment and a vast array of other situations that should have been dealt with in childhood by parents.
Just my humble opinion, not meant to argue....