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And on the subject of Chuck and dating. I knew chuck before he remarried, he seemed to be contented. He had a small ranch, had cows, I think a few hogs, chickens, rabbits. He had hay ground, and had enough to keep him busy and contented. Then he remarried. wasnt long before he sold out a good rock free ranch of some. likely 40 acres, to go to Harrisonville Arkansas, where she came from to live in a condo of sorts. He, after a year or 2 bought 2 acres on a hillside that was a rock quarry and tried to make a garden out of it. Thats one reason id NEVER marry again, and ive seen it happen to other people I knew. Guy I knew as a kid, and well after I started farming, had his own farm. Neighbor had a bad accident, and Bob, that was his name, Pollard for a last name went over to help out doing chores and such. Well, neighbor hung on and on. Meanwhile Bob got to noticing that neighbors wife was prettier than he had ever seen her before, and, u can guess the rest. People said that the wife finally had enough of taking care of her hubby, and helped him along to the afterlife. After a brief time, they married, Bob and her. Now, they had 2 farms. BUT she was through with farm life. She got him to sell his and she sold hers, and they moved into town, where they lived for around 5yrs. I had seen Bob in town, and could tell he was miserable. He kept busy doing torch work and welding a bit and fixing kids bicycles. He died in his early 60s.
 

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Um, no. I've got a male partner and another woman won't be welcome in this house.
I don't know.... there are some days I really could use a mom or maybe even a good wife... But she'd have to sleep in her own room, and leave me and hubs alone.
 

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@FarmboyBill if you want a partner put yourself out there and try.

I have done this enough to know it doesn't work for me. I came by it honestly....my Daddy couldn't find a decent woman to save his life. I seem to inherited that talent/curse for men
 

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Don't let "good enough" be the enemy of perfect.
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Wisdom from personal experience:

1. Men marry a woman hoping that she won't change.

2. Women marry a man hoping that he will change into what she has in mind.

3. Invariably, both end up disappointed: She changes and he doesn't.
 

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@NRA_guy this is pretty much true in my observation.
That's one reason why I think the perfect set up may be 2 cabins with a large shaded breezeway between them. Meet for breakfast or dinner. Discuss how the previous day went. Discuss if there is anything you'd like to do together that day and if not, go back to your separate cabins. Maybe work out a system with a pull rope and a bell to inquire if the other one would like some amorous company.
I know my previous relationship was much better when he wasn't at the house all the time. Men, I don't care if you supervised a crew of 50 most of your life. Do NOT boss your wife..... especially on house and farm stuff that she's been doing just fine for the last 10+ years without you. Find some other way to make yourself feel relevant.
That relationship still does pretty good....on the phone .....with a state between us. Isn't called ID awesome? 😎
 

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i know exactly what you mean Bill. i was talking to him after Pat died and he seemed to be happy on his farm. i was glad when he found a partner and i know Barb was good to him but when he talked about selling his farm and moving to the condo i knew what would happen. i did the same thing myself but kept my land and spent half my time going back home. i never could settle there. it's hard for someone who has a bit of land to go to a confined space. i'm still in the city but enough land for a nice garden,trees etc. and like TxMex nobody to boss me around when i had always been my own boss for 40 years and knew exactly what i was doing. ~Georgia
 

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I don't know.... there are some days I really could use a mom or maybe even a good wife... But she'd have to sleep in her own room, and leave me and hubs alone.
I've got too much heavy work for another woman, unless she's one of those body builder types. A man can wash dishes and cook as well as a woman.

I miss having my son around to help with the heavy work. He was good about making sure I got something to eat when I got too busy to remember to eat. He won't leave his air conditioned apartment to help in this heat.
 

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A single person (male or female) who wants to find partner has to make it known to the opposite gender that he is available.

The best way to do that is for him to start dating women---whoever he can---without regard to whether the othet person is attractive or has a good personality.

What evolves is the available man gets into circulation with other singles. He runs into single women and eventually he will find one who meshes with him.

He also needs to do things like go to church, join social or charity organizations, etc., wherever people mix and mingle.

I think of it like the little black bugs that zip around on the surface of a lake. They bump into a hundred other bugs and eventually they run into one that is compatible.

The other place I met women when I was single was in grocery stores. It's really easy to start a conversation there. Ask a woman who is by herself about some food or whatever to get the ball rolling. Something like, "Excuse me, can you tell me which one of these roasts is the best one?"

Heck, I have had women start conversations with me in grocery stores. Once, when I was looking at frozen pizzas a woman came up behind me and asked, "See anything you like?"

But at that time I was too ignorant to catch her drift.
Just check for wedding rings before you start chatting with women in grocery stores. Husbands tend to be just around the corner and don't care so much for intruders. My wife was bugged by a few men when I wasn't around that actually made suggestive passes until she told them her husband shoots first, asks no questions and buries deep.
 

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Nah I told her friend to nicely tell her that I was a former farmer, and I had been married to 3 city girls and id be hanged if I ever line up with another. She got the message.
Most of them gals can cook. You might not want to be too hasty on turning down the opportunity. Plus you don't just marry her....you adopt the whole family. If she doesn't cook, I assure you that somebody does!
 

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Do not look for a woman in a bar. She might be a fun date, but in the long run it can be a disaster.
Exactly. She's most likely not "Mrs. Right"...but may be "Mrs. Right Now".

Do not commit to marry ANY woman until you have known each other for at least 2 years. People (men and women) will pretend to be whatever you are seeking in order to get you to make a commitment. Then their true personality comes out.
A prenup isn't a bad idea, either.

Especially, do not lock into seeing only one woman right after you get a divorce.
True that! Have some fun! Play the field!

Do not marry any woman who is under about 25 years old. They will grow up into someone different. There is an old saying that men marry a woman hoping that she won't change, and women marry a man hoping that he will change---and both end up being disappointed.
Just dumb on both sides.
 
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