BiPolar

Discussion in 'Homesteading Questions' started by PonderosaQ, Sep 4, 2004.

  1. PonderosaQ

    PonderosaQ Well-Known Member Supporter

    Messages:
    1,834
    Joined:
    Jan 12, 2004
    Location:
    SW VA
    I saw lots of posts from people who are or have family that are bi-polar i reponse to a thread titled "paranoia".I have a daughter that is bi-polar and am finding it a real challenge. Her meds (which she takes) help, but aren't a cure all by any means. It's one of the reasons I moved away from a developed area as I and her drs thought this life style would be better for her. Any opinions on that? Anyone who'd like to chat or share their experiences on having this in their lives feel free to pm me.

    Thanks a lot.
    PQ
     
  2. BamaSuzy

    BamaSuzy Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    951
    Joined:
    May 10, 2002
    I was once married to a man who was bipolar. He new how to "work the system" and would con his doctors out of all kinds of things. He wouldn't take his medications regularly and was frequently violent towards me and his children.

    He could go into a new town and have five or six different churches supporting him without any of them knowing the others were helping...but he would never try to help himself...

    I stuck with him as long as I could...HE has since been jailed in California for threatening to blow up the human services building in his county; drugs; and I don't know what else. He likely won't come back here because there is an active warrant for him here...

    He had the best doctors available here in Alabama and we have some of the finest doctors in Birmingham in the world...

    I think the important thing is to keep them on their medication but with a child stress that they are still responsible for their own actions.
     

  3. Buffy in Dallas

    Buffy in Dallas Well-Known Member Supporter

    Messages:
    1,447
    Joined:
    May 10, 2002
    Location:
    Tx
    Stress can set off a "bipolar person". My son had his last hospitalization at the beginning of a new school year. We have been very lucky to find a medication that helps him with no side effects. He is very sensitive to meds! Took 5 years to find the right med. He is on depakote now. Each person has to find the meds that work for them!
    The country is a great place for "stress sensitive" people. Which is why we are trying to get back out to the country now.
     
  4. Ravenlost

    Ravenlost Well-Known Member Supporter

    Messages:
    24,572
    Joined:
    Jul 20, 2004
    Location:
    MS
    I also agree with your doctor. My son is Bipolar. He works a part-time job at a pizza place and that is the ONLY thing he does...it's all he can handle. He has no social life, no nothing except that job. He was hired to take phone orders, but it was to stressful for him so he is in the back making pizzas...something he can handle much easier.

    He enjoys living in my home more than in his dad's home because we're out in the country. There's no traffic going by, no phone ringing, no kids (his dad has a 12-year-old son) in and out, no nothing. He works, he sleeps (a lot), he plays games on the computer, he reads and that's pretty much it.

    When he is with us he is much better...not as irrational and his moods tend to level out better. The world is just to stressful for him.
     
  5. Chikin

    Chikin Member

    Messages:
    20
    Joined:
    Aug 27, 2004
    I know 4 people who are close to me that are BiPolar. my sister, my god mother, my dad's girlfriend, and my cousin's girlfriend. I can't even get started telling you about them
     
  6. kitty32_z8

    kitty32_z8 Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    703
    Joined:
    Jun 17, 2003
    OH BOY do I have a comment!!!! I have a brother,husband,and 2 children who are bipolor. I live in the country because of my family and myself ( physical medical reasons for me). My husband and children have multiple dx.s and are severe.
    I spent years with my husband living in the city, we were both raised in the country. hten came along my children in which I lived in the city. Finally called it quits after my oldest child reached age 8. Our sucess in treatment is great compared to the city. I cant imagine going through what I have and am still going through living in the city. I know all 3 of them would be either incarcerated or in residential full time.
    Medications are a real trick because everyone is different. What medication works for one doesnt work for even soemone who seems to have the same dx.s. My husband is mostly stable long as he has no stresses ( I take care of all bills), he is unable to work even though he has tried many times. One of my sons is mostly stable but requires and EBT classroom with many accomidations. My younger son who is BP is not stable and have been told he probably never will be, his and my hubbys dxs. go far beyond just BP. He requires 24/7 care/suprevision and is presently on a home tutor program until proper placement with the school district. He has been in every setting so far available without it meeting his needs, so we are inventing a program.
    I can understand what it means to have BP family! I also understand that most of society shuns them due to misinformation or ignorance. I am willing obviously to share my experiences( for everyone it is different).
    For support for yourself you might wish to go to www.bpkids.org. the people there on the boards are great and really understand the strugles.
    Take care of yourself,
    Kathy
     
  7. nappy

    nappy Well-Known Member Supporter

    Messages:
    940
    Joined:
    Aug 17, 2003
    Location:
    Michigan..NWLower
    With some posters stating personal experience with bipolar disorder, I almost started a topic about "how many of us here have loved ones or friends who have this disorder". My son, who is now 25, surprised us with it at age 21 just after he decided to quit college. Many things contributed to his bipolar disorder including a brain tumor, his struggle with depression, my second marriage, and his father dying when he was 8. What traumatic times have been endured by all of us. So many hospitalizations, jail time, living on the streets, and a bit of fear for him and us. He is unable to drive and is unable to hold a job after a few attempts to do (visual problems also). I do appreciate that he receives disability income. He does not want to live where we do and resides in a AFC home in a town that has transportation and places for he and others like him to congregate. I feel comfortable in the fact that he has those who watch over and care for him. The problem for those taking medication for the disorder...it definitely helps the symptoms but the patient resists taking it. In the manic phase (without meds or if they aren't being effective) the person feels wonderful..."why do I need the meds?" Sounds logical to him but his behavior is totally unacceptable (and quite often frightening) to the "normal" population. I was impressed by the "Dateline" show last Wed. about Jane Pauley and her experience from a medication induced (steroids) bipolar disorder. Her bipolar problem seemed to me very mild in comparison to my son's. Anyway, who else has had experience with bipolar disorder?
     
  8. Thumper/inOkla.

    Thumper/inOkla. Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    594
    Joined:
    May 10, 2002
    Location:
    centeral Okla. S of I-40, E of I-35
    I have simular problems and have meds at hand if needed, I wondered if anyone else had studied about fungal infections and the effect they have, I am much better when I stay away from sugars and keep carb's lower, when I use suppliments for treating fungal infection in the body I get so much improved, I almost forget about it, until I eat a brownie...
     
  9. kitty32_z8

    kitty32_z8 Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    703
    Joined:
    Jun 17, 2003
    Thumper
    The sugar,carb issue sounds like one of my sons. He has hypoglycemia caused by when he was taking Zypreza. He has to eat protien throughout the day to not rage. Just a thought.
     
  10. fordy

    fordy Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    9,264
    Joined:
    Sep 13, 2003
    Location:
    Whiskey Flats(Ft. Worth) , Tx
    ..............I spent 5 years with a lady who had BP . She would never stay on her meds so she , her Daughter and myself ALL went thru 6 kinds of HELL during her crazy period(s) . I , finally had enough , and just had to move on . Took me 2 years to regain my sanity . I never knew this condition existed until I got involved with her . I don't want to have to go thru that experience AGAIN . I , know first hand how hard it must be for Parents who have kids with BP to deal with this condition . ...fordy.... :eek: :)
     
  11. weg

    weg Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    84
    Joined:
    Feb 3, 2003
    My sister was BP,she died of self inflicted (so we were told,she was living with a crazy man)burns to 90% of her body,torched herself with lighter fluid.She would not take her meds,just everybody elses.PLEASE take your meds or make sure your loved ones do.
     
  12. Ravenlost

    Ravenlost Well-Known Member Supporter

    Messages:
    24,572
    Joined:
    Jul 20, 2004
    Location:
    MS
    weg, I am so sorry about your sister.

    Unfortunately, I have no idea how to make my son take his meds. He's an adult. What can I do?
     
  13. Terri

    Terri Singletree & Weight Loss & Permaculture Moderator Staff Member Supporter

    Messages:
    14,712
    Joined:
    May 10, 2002
    Location:
    Kansas
    In my husbands family it isn't BP, it's schizophrenia. Lots of it.

    Here's a wonderfull support group for those who want one. www.conductdisorders.com
     
  14. kathy H

    kathy H kathyh

    Messages:
    393
    Joined:
    Dec 9, 2002
    Location:
    California
    I just read recently that fish oil tablets help bipolar. Something about omega threes evening out sixes. Fish oil is cheap, might be worth a try.
     
  15. Grandma's Cabin

    Grandma's Cabin Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    64
    Joined:
    Aug 28, 2004
  16. PonderosaQ

    PonderosaQ Well-Known Member Supporter

    Messages:
    1,834
    Joined:
    Jan 12, 2004
    Location:
    SW VA
    Thanks to all of you for your input and for the URL's. I'll be sure to check them out.

    My family is riddled with this disease. I only mentioned the one daughter cos she is the hardest to "live" with. Even with multiple meds, years of therapy and usually an annual hospitalization she doesn't function well. Luckily she does take meds regularly. She finally wants to be as well as she can be and doesn't want to die. She doesn't enjoy mania at all unlike some BP's.

    It's an incredibly difficult way to live for us all. Financially it's been a disaster too as in NJ where we used to live no-one would take the medicaid that comes with her Medicare. We are redoing an old MH on the property so she can have a place of her own. Mostly cos mom can't take any more of her moods, mess and music, but also cos as an adult she needs something to make her feel like one.

    She has tried working but can't last anywere for long. It's just too stressful and she doesn't get along well with lots of people or they with her.

    It's still too soon to tell if the move will really help her. She's still trying to meet people and adjust. Not to mention getting used to the small mountainous roads...she's wrecked 2 cars in 6 mths. That's a problem in the country. Without a car I'm her only transportation.

    Nice to know I'm far from alone with this struggle and that her drs may have been on target in suggesting a country life for her.

    Liz
     
  17. kitty32_z8

    kitty32_z8 Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    703
    Joined:
    Jun 17, 2003
    Weg- sorry about your sister, maybe some good can come by teaching others to take there meds. I have little to no trouble in that area so far. Hubby has had his moments of 'its everyone else that needs meds not him' phase. I just tell him ok but remmeber you said your meds helps. He has only lasted about 7 hours before he realizes he has too take them. I often have to remind him that he seems normal to him, but it is the rest of us that have to live with him that cant stand him off meds.

    Terri- thank you for the link I had forgotten about them. Hubby and one son are shizo./bp (both) how they tell the difference still amazes me. www.shizophrenia.com is a good link also for those of us dealing with shizo. I have found it interesting insitght to read posts from those with shizo. It kind of gives me insight into there minds, being I cant actually understand.

    The country life is much better for family. I might suggest though finding things to sooth them during manic fazes, along with keeping there hand busy. I use allot of the physical therapy ideas for sensory issues. I also encourage my sons to play video games so there hands are moving fast as there minds. I also encourage always physical labor/exercise. I find when they work more aorund the house and get PE at school htey stay more centered. For an adult maybe hard labor in the yard or an exercise bike to work off frustration.

    Kathy
     
  18. EmpressG

    EmpressG Member

    Messages:
    13
    Joined:
    May 14, 2002
    [QUOTE

    Unfortunately, I have no idea how to make my son take his meds. He's an adult. What can I do?[/QUOTE]

    There is NOTHING legally you can do. I just went through a HORRIBLE thing with my mother who has SZ. After caring for her and my father for over three years, (and stupidly NOT getting her declared incompetent because she was more or less cooperative) she was volunarily "kidnapped" by relatives to get her money (the retirement my father left to care for her the rest of her life.) We haven't heard from her, she ran away when we visited and because they took her out of state I can't even successfully take them to court. (Her doctors, etc, who would testify are here.) We spent thousands already and finally let it rest for now. It is not like she will be any happier one place or the other. She even KNOWS she is buying the "love" they never gave her before (visited twice in 30 years), yet doesn't care, she wants it that badly. She denies the existance of her children and grandchildren, (rather hard on them... suddenly Granny doesn't love you?)

    I strongly suggest people with SZ and similar illnesses avoid having children and consider sterilzation. It is very hard growing up with that kind of stress. My oldest is exhibiting alarming tendancies and is already decided not to continue the "curse" unless things change.

    When you find a medicine that works well, life becomes bearable, at least for the family for a while. But I don't see my mother as having ever been happy and content, though we tried everything. After over 20 years on the drugs her cognitive abilities were really reduced. A short time before she left, I realized she was withdrawing from social situations more because she really didn't understand life around her. Once while at a ladies meeting the conversation got to a food she remembered preparing once, suddenly she came alive and told us all about it in painful (and somewhat inappropriate) detail. Before that she just sat and stared.
    The best analogy I got was from a doctor who said her emotional abilites (and cognitive by then) were that of a young child. Indeed she needed a regular schedule, naps, threw tantrums if she didn't get what she wanted and if planned activities weren't found, she got bored and that in itself became a stress. But like a small child she had no emotional depth. She could be easily distracted by a new "toy" and sort of forget everything and everyone else. Even after all that we have been through, if she suddenly appeared on my doorstep to live with me, she would expect everything to be exactly the same.

    My daughter tried Zoloft once in highschool when under a great deal of stress. While it was sort of great for us (the rest of the family) she said it felt like being in a chemical straight jacket. I have read from other folks on a SZ list that the lack of feeling anything, and weight gain are two of the worst side effects. Mental health workers that are burned out because there are no real answers, thus they just don't respond too quickly or try too hard are another common complaint. Add to that the new privacy laws....even though I had POA for my mother for the last 10 years or so, since she has been talked out of trusting me, I have no more access to her or her previous records. You might want to request and keep your own records, just in case.
     
  19. Ann-NWIowa

    Ann-NWIowa Well-Known Member Supporter

    Messages:
    5,830
    Joined:
    Sep 28, 2002
    I work for an attorney. A large part of my job is working one-on-one gathering personal/financial information for bankrutpcy from clients. Lately I've been working with four individuals who have some form of mental illness and a couple others with depression. I don't have knowledge or training in dealing with mental health issues so I feel like I'm walking on egg shells all the time. It is major stressful for me and obviously totally destressing for the clients. I feel so bad for them but still have to press them for the information we need in order to help them. I thought one lady last week was/is very close to going over the edge and mentioned to the other secretary that I was afraid I'd done something wrong. She had over heard my meeting with the lady and told me she thought I'd been very sensitive, but it still worries me. So many of these people are alone without friends or family. I'm sure in the majority of cases their families have given up on them or maybe are emotionally exhausted from trying to deal with their loved one's problems and had to detach for their own sanity. It seems to me the safety net for these people has an awful lot of holes in it. I obviously don't have any answers, in fact, have doubts there are any real answers. However, I certainly admire the strength and patience of all of you who are living with these issues day to day.
     
  20. breezynosacek

    breezynosacek Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    223
    Joined:
    Nov 7, 2003
    Location:
    VA
    Yes, I agree that sometimes mental health issues are much better when they remain active. However.....

    There's always that however!

    From personal experience, they had me diagnosed as Bipolar, and the meds would work for awhile and then not work for awhile. Crisis centers became my second home. All I wanted was stability.

    I was told by a psychiatrist that the 'bipolar disorder' was not permanent in most cases. Although some would seem to show the tendancies all of their lives, some could be cured and go off of medication.

    I asked her how?

    She did a test that I wasn't aware of a test until years later. The test being to find out why I had a chemical imbalance. She asked me to talk about my family or what memories I had. Rage came up, resentment, pain and anger.

    From that one small discussion, she was able to tell me (correctly) that my bipolar would reverse itself, IF I dealt with the issues that caused me to be angry and depressed and anxious.
    She told me that I wouldn't have to be on the meds IF I dealt with those issues.

    HMM! There was only one problem and I didn't discuss it with her or anyone else. There is no way to sort through those feelings while you are drugged up on those meds.

    Several years later they got to the real root of the problem for me, which was PTSD.

    Now, PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder) has many different symptoms. In other words they can look like many different disorders if they are not treated properly. I've got two friends who are diagnosed as shizophrenic. Both were severely abused one by a priest, the other was ritually abused and crucified through her hands and feet by her mother.

    If you look up MPD (Multiple Personality Disorder) these days called DID (Dissociative Identity Disorder) you will find that the handbook that they use to label people describes MPD with all of the symptoms of EVERY mental disorder known to man!

    How is that!??? Well, pretty simple. When you injure a person emotionally, mentally and spiritually, those traumas go untouched and unhealed many times and they pile on top of each other and each time an injury occurs it is easier to be injured.

    After almost a decade of feeling well and not having to have the meds I began to realise something was wrong again. I didn't know what, I kept doing an inventory but the anger and rage were there and I couldn't stop it.

    We moved to a nice quiet place out in the country and it didn't fix it because I had to get a job in a factory where the noise and stress levels were horrible.

    Why, had I started to have problems again? We couldn't figure it out and I didn't want to go back into the mental health system again.

    You are not going to believe what has been affecting me!

    Transformers from appliances and motors from fans right in my home! The biggest one? The transofrmer from a phone that a freind gave us shortly prior to us having those problems.

    In the city there wasn't enough QUIET to hear it, it was basically 'white noise'. In the country, I started turning things off...

    The ceiling fan, the window fan, the computer (which normally stayed on all day and night), lights, clocks, just about anything and everything that made a noise and there was still a hum that was killing me.

    The muscles in my neck were so tight that I often had headaches, my ears were ringing, I was grinding my teeth in my sleep, I had trouble sleeping, I was exhausted all of the time, I suffered depression, my joints hurt all of the time, my muscles hurt all of the time, I thought I had contracted somehow Chronic Fatique Syndrome and Fybromyalgia and I wondered what in the world was going on with me!


    So, one day I am turning off all of the appliances and everything because at that point, I became aware that although my husband is very irritating it isn't him and although I can definitely get into a funk at times it wasn't entirely an emotional, spiritual or mental issue there was something in the house that was causing it.

    Finally, the tranformers for the cordless phones and the answering machines were left and by this time I was in frantic tears and I pulled the one but couldn't get to the other two and hubby had to for me.

    He pulled those plugs and suddenly the pain the stress everything just WHOOSHED from my body. I sobbed in relief because for years now, I've been after my husband for making too much noise, for turning off the television, for turning off the radio even in the van or car! This humming/vibration noise was so constant that I got to where I couldn't stand any kind of noise whatsoever!

    I'm getting healthy again for the first time in years. Physically healthy and mentally healthy.

    I've just about cleaned the entire place from top to bottom. I'm laughing, literally for the first time in years. I'm not talking about the ha-ha from a joke or movie but laughing because of joy in life.