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I put a sign on my back door: "If you are an EMT and you find me on the floor, but I'm talking to you--put me in the truck. If I'm out and not talking......go back to your truck and smoke a couple of cigarettes...... then come back."

Takes care of my problems.

:)

geo
 

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We have already planned to move to town. We don’t know when that will be but I think we’ll know when the time is right. We don’t expect our kids to take care of us.
Smartest post here...The others are good tips on how to make living alone out in the sticks a little easier, but don't answer the real question--What are you gunna do when you can't do it any longer?

Plan ahead....Aging is not a smooth downhill slope--It's a stair case with multiple landings, some treads or risers a little longer or shorter than others....Towards the end of life, we deteriorate just as quickly as a baby advances over those first 3 or 4 yrs.

My 91 y/o Ma (lives with Sis) always worries that she'll get Alzheimer's and be a burden. I tell her not to worry about it..Once you get it, you don't know you got it.....So, maybe we won't "know when it's time."...Plan ahead.
 

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I used to work in social services with the elderly. One of the saddest things was to watch the anger of adult children that have to purge their deceased parents "stuff". How so much just went into dumpsters. Some having to take off work, fly to different states in order to accomplish this. If you want the last memories of you to be angry ones, just say "I'll let the kids decide what they want when I die - they can do what they want with my things. Do you think they really are going to go through your 200 book collection one by one?

If you do move "to be near the kids", just remember they may move away...due to jobs, etc. Are you going to follow them around?

What are you gunna do when you can't do it any longer?
Yes, Doc-, I agree - plan ahead. Lots of ways to do that without compromising a lifestyle too much or being dependent on others. To me, that's part of being responsible for yourself.
 

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I used to work in social services with the elderly. One of the saddest things was to watch the anger of adult children that have to purge their deceased parents "stuff". How so much just went into dumpsters. Some having to take off work, fly to different states in order to accomplish this. If you want the last memories of you to be angry ones, just say "I'll let the kids decide what they want when I die - they can do what they want with my things. Do you think they really are going to go through your 200 book collection one by one?

If you do move "to be near the kids", just remember they may move away...due to jobs, etc. Are you going to follow them around?



Yes, Doc-, I agree - plan ahead. Lots of ways to do that without compromising a lifestyle too much or being dependent on others. To me, that's part of being responsible for yourself.
In my work, I have done a lot of house clearings after folks pass on.

It is amazing how little of our stuff the rest of the family wants.

Sure, the guns and jewelry, coins and such are taken. Usually with a bunch of vitriol and infighting.

But the other stuff, the things that we as individuals hold as valuable, or sentimental, are usually just tossed in a big dumpster or taken to Goodwill.
 

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i don't have any guns or jewellry. i do have a lot of fine china. antique linens etc. i can't dispose of it yet because i still use it. not this year of course (just the little i use for myself)but i live in hope i will again.

my son couldn't care less. as i've mentioned before he'd just as soon drink from a tin can and eat off paper plates etc. not into fine living at all like i am. i've already told him i'll come back and haunt him if he throws these away if i go downhill fast and can't get rid of it all myself. ~Georgia
 

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In my work, I have done a lot of house clearings after folks pass on.

It is amazing how little of our stuff the rest of the family wants.

Sure, the guns and jewelry, coins and such are taken. Usually with a bunch of vitriol and infighting.

But the other stuff, the things that we as individuals hold as valuable, or sentimental, are usually just tossed in a big dumpster or taken to Goodwill.
Dad bought a house almost three years ago. It was of those letters we send out fishing. The parents had passed and the daughter wanted only 35k. The neighbors had a key for us to inspect. The daughter showed up at closing and brought a pick-up. She drove a hundred miles and only wanted the appliances. She left over 20k in antiques and collectibles.
 

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When I can no longer take care of myself. it's time to go. I intend to be buried right here on my place. In New Mexico, if you own your property free and clear, you can be buried on it. My property is in a Trust, and I have fenced off a area for a family plot. I have made arrangements with a local contractor to dig the grave.
 

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When I can no longer take care of myself. it's time to go. I intend to be buried right here on my place. In New Mexico, if you own your property free and clear, you can be buried on it. My property is in a Trust, and I have fenced off a area for a family plot. I have made arrangements with a local contractor to dig the grave.
My plan is to be cremated and thrown in the pond. If the super dummies can't figure that out after the number of times I've said so ???
 

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Posted 2/8/21 6:26 PM CST

I put a sign on my back door: "If you are an EMT and you find me on the floor, but I'm talking to you--put me in the truck. If I'm out and not talking......go back to your truck and smoke a couple of cigarettes...... then come back."

Takes care of my problems.

:)

geo
That reminds me of the promise me and 3 guys on graveyard shift made each other. If one of us were to drop out on our way to dead, the other 3 would load us on the electric forklift that charged in our work area and drive us to the 24 hour porn video store next door to the plant so our obit didn't read that we died at work. :)
 
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Discussion Starter #33
This is sad. ^^^^^

Hubby and I visited my grandparents quite often, even stayed with Grandma and did work around the house for her after Grandpa passed. We try to visit and help Mom and Pop as much as possible, when hubby isn't stuck at work.

We haven't decided what we will do when we get too incapacitated to live here. I keep telling hubby we need to down-size our stuff. Our kids have said they will just throw everything in a dumpster.
[/QUOTEmy kids said the same dumpster stuff too..dsughter on law keeps tell me she will rent some SO I CAN PUT STUFF IN THEM. Funny cant carry a catlitter box out much less g g grandmoms bedroom set. Had to tell her just last night she can do all she wants starting the day i die...and hung up. Caused a huge telephone fight with my son.
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I have been meaning to add to this thread for some time but I keep forgetting.........
After ¾ of a century learning and remembering stuff I have an awful lot of stuff to forget and it takes so little effort to do that so I am making good progress in that regard …so far as I remember! It gets frustrating at times when you know that you know but just cant seem to retrieve the name of that woodland plant that you have told so many visitors about, or even the place on the computer where you saved the list so you could look it up when you forgot. (there is a list I shared on this forum someplace but I forget where.)

Frankly it can be bloody scary when you cant retrieve that simple bit of basis information from your mind, I think there is a name for this affliction but I forget what its called...... something like …..ahh I remember now ….... SOMETIMERS!
 

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When I am struggling to remember something I have to let my mind relax. It's like searching furiously for your glasses only to find them on your face.
 

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Being ill has brought some realist problems to mind. I live alone no family close. Too far to walk to neighbors, mailbox. 24 miles to town.
Has anyone thought about how you plan for when you cant drive? Even temporary?
Grocery stores dont deliver, no grub hub or shopping services.
Or limited income prevents hired help. When do you know you need to move from the sticks.
I’ve always felt I was born too old.
 

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I'm feeling quite fortunate! Yes I'm finally up in years so that, when I look into the mirror, I'm actually seeing what is there! (Most of my life I'd look into the mirror and be surprised that a young woman was staring back at me!)

What a difference for me! I have lived on 6 acres since 1995 (to keep mother out of a nursing home). I've tended a small herd of dairy goats, a small flock of fowl and still work "with" two adult dogs (one an LGD who has added me to her "guard" list). This year I've been "forced" to realize I don't get around as I use to and cannot do all I use to do...mostly because the ground is not all that level...but also because my knees cannot be trusted and my energy is just not there as it use to be.

My grown son (semi-disabled) has returned to live with me; and it has become so obvious he has matured! I am so blessed!!! He has literally taken over the responsibilities around here in such a way that my main one is to prepare the meals. And he has even downloaded some recipies for me to look at....ROFL Yes he loves to eat! Yet has not once complained about what I cook...nor how it turns out. LOL

I can still walk...slowly and often with help...and when we get out to do the "monthly" shopping spree my son is right there offering his arm or getting me a cart to push (hold onto while walking) or even getting me set in a riding grocery cart. (I remember doing so much like this for my mother...tended her for 18 yrs...and she would often say "Everyone wants a Jodie!" Now I'm thinking the same, i.e. "Everyone getting up in years needs a David!")

My entire life has been spent carrying responsibilities; and now my hardest task is to accept the fact I don't need to carry them anymore. It is actually becoming fun to know I can rest whenever I want, sleep whenever I want, eat whenever I want ... AND 'PLAY'!!!

Oh and I plan to be on my feet when my Jesus returns!!!!
 

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I think we all have to consider options if we can’t maintain our current location. I have 3 sons but do not in any way expect help from them. We downsized when we moved here to our lake cabin 20 years ago. House is around 900 sf. We have a garden area. We enjoy living here. I have thought would I want to stay here if something were to happen to DH. We are 12 miles from town. I would probably install an alarm system and stay put. Guess I will cross that bridge if and when I have to. We have 10 acres on the edge of town. We have discussed building there if we felt we needed to be closer in. Heck we have a nice RV I could live In it. Guess I am just thinking out loud. But I am blessed to have options.
 

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I put a sign on my back door: "If you are an EMT and you find me on the floor, but I'm talking to you--put me in the truck. If I'm out and not talking......go back to your truck and smoke a couple of cigarettes...... then come back."

Takes care of my problems.

:)Just put a DNR on the refridgerator'

geo
 
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