Any single women adopting kids in the country?

Discussion in 'Homesteading Questions' started by amelia, Feb 9, 2004.

  1. amelia

    amelia Well-Known Member

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    I'd love to hear about any single women (or men, for that matter) who have adopted an older child to live with them on the homestead. It's something I'm considering. How amenable are adoption agencies to this kind of thing? Do the kids generally do well?
     
  2. fin29

    fin29 Well-Known Member

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    If you go through your state's Department of Human Services, there are always lots of older children available. They're considered "special needs" or "hard to place" because most families want newborn caucasian babies, not 14 year old girls with histories of abuse and abandonment issues (not that they're all that way). It's also ususally free to adopt them, except for the classes and home study programs you would be required to do. It would probably be pretty easy to adopt children like that as a single man, woman, unmarried or gay couple, though I don't know that I would want to deal with some of those challenges all alone as a single parent.
     

  3. westbrook

    westbrook In Remembrance

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    I met a single woman in her 60's that is a foster parent and all of the kids do a fair project each year or as long as she has them. Being that they are teenagers usually means they are in their forever home. A couple of the kids were brother and sisters, but not all if the were related. You could tell she loved them and they loved her! It was so impressive to see these kids handeling livestock like they had always lived on a farm.
     
  4. Don Armstrong

    Don Armstrong In Remembrance

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    My thought would be that if I (mid-fifties, divorced male) were to attempt to adopt they'd first say "too old", and they'd also think that the mere attempt demonstrated mental instability so severe as to be dissociated from reality, and unfit. The only possibilities would be those older children, and they for durned sure woudn't be giving any disturbed or victimised young women into my care.

    However, foster care might well be a possibility, foster care can grow to adoption if all parties (child, carer, Welfare) want it to. In the meantime, foster carers get funding for the kids. If you didn't want to use it straight away for their care, you could save it for later (say,an education fund).
     
  5. Ohiosteve

    Ohiosteve Well-Known Member

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    Be very very careful. There are many older children out there that are available for adoption. However, from our experience most of them have deep emotional scars.
    My wife and I started the adoption process six years ago. We were confronted
    with a Catch 22 situation. They told us that because we had no children of our own we were unexperienced parents and were denied. We finally started the
    process with two sisters 9 and 11. What a nightmare! Come to find out that
    they were raised in a crack house. After 10 days everybody was ready to call it quits. I don't know where you are at but some states are better than others
    when it comes to adoption. Ohio is the pits! We finally were able to adopt
    two newborn babies from Oklahoma. Haley is now three and Heath is one.
    We are the only parents they have or will ever know. Oklahoma is very adoption
    friendly. Remember all states require a homestudy. This is a long process and
    it is costly. Ours cost $2500. You will have to jump through many many hoops.
    I think we had our fingerprints taken 5 or 6 times each. The homestudy can be done through your local Childrens Services Agency, however, our county's
    agency told us that they were just too busy to accommodate us.
    I think all states have a website with adoptable children and their biographies.
    Find the one for your state and browse al of the possibilities.