Advice for adopting

Discussion in 'Countryside Families' started by wendys_goats, Nov 20, 2006.

  1. wendys_goats

    wendys_goats wendys_goats

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    My husband and I are thinking about adopting. My kids are grown and all but one are on their own.
    I have some questions. Can a person adopt if they don't have a lot of money or a huge house. How expensive is it for the legal stuff. We were thinking of older children. We are a mixed race couple(white and hispanic). Our hearts are bigger than our pocket book. Is there a chance for some one like us to adopt? Where can we go for help?
     
  2. mpillow

    mpillow Well-Known Member Supporter

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    ABSOLUTELY!!! :)

    Go to your state homepage and find the family services agency DHHS? and look for the adoption link

    or www.adoptuskids.org
     

  3. Traci Ann

    Traci Ann Domestic Engineer

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    Back to the other side of the rainbow!
    Go to Adopt America Network - Looking AAN...
     
  4. cindyc

    cindyc Well-Known Member

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    There are also foundations that help families adopt internationally who don't have the money. There is a big need there too. Right now, the adoption agency we used has two waiting children in Guatemala they are trying to place.

    Google Shohanna's hope. I think that is the name of one of them.

    Cindyc.
     
  5. clovis

    clovis Well-Known Member

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    Try your state department of child services.

    In Indiana, in our case to adopt a 5 year old, we will have absolutely zero cost with the adoption. The state covers everything.

    One option is to become foster parents. In Indiana, foster parents are paid by the day, which is about $25 for most of the kids. They do pay more for special needs kids, which is $50 a day. It doesn't take much for a kid to have special needs. All of their healthcare and medication is covered by Medicaid.

    Foster care could be a way for you to give to your hearts content, and help lots of kids during difficult times. Fostering will also get you into the 'system', which may help tremendously when adopting.

    Fostering is alot of work, most often with hurting and broken children. It can be difficult and time consuming, but tremendously rewarding at the same time.

    Might give it some thought.
    clove
     
  6. Tonya

    Tonya Guest

    I second what Clovis said!!

    We were foster parents for 5+ years and have four of the most beautiful kids to show for it! We didn't pay a dime for the adoptions-the Sate paid for it all. My kids are either in a minority or have been drug exposed in utereo, so they consider them "damaged". :flame: We get a small stiped each month and they are covered by medicare.

    Check out www.fosterparents.com for more info-or you can PM me!
     
  7. MomOf4

    MomOf4 Well-Known Member

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    Unfortunately, I had to learn about this when going through our adoption, but ours was hotly contested.

    Children are considered special needs or hard to place when they are...

    -older, typically over the age of 2
    -part of a sibling group
    -have a disability (even a speech impediment or slight learning disability)
    -a member of a minority race
    -at risk (including possibility of future emotional issues)

    There are over 126,000 children in this country waiting to be adopted, and the state not only pays for the adoption to promote the child to be adopted, but if they are considered special needs or hard to place, there is adoption subsidy available through both federal and state/county, where you will receive payments until the child is of age (kind of like SSI payments).

    You are required to complete a home study in order to adopt. It is not as scary as you might think. There is only a minimum amount of square footage of bedroom space you are required to have for each child (actually, rediculously small - something like 50 square feet). We had to flush our toilet, give a tour of our home, provide misc. info, including marriage certificate and birth certificates, and answer a very long questionnaire.

    Because we are on well, we had to have the water tested, and we did not pass the first time, so we had to treat the well with bleach water, and it passed the second time - no big deal.

    Good luck!

    Michelle
    momof4, now Mom of 5 (as of last week!!!)
     
  8. tyusclan

    tyusclan Well-Known Member

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    Mom of 4's advice about special needs adoptions applies here in FL as well. As most know we adopted sib group of 8 in '02. Because it was a special needs adoption all expenses were covered. There was no out of pocket expense for us.
    Glad to hear ya'll are considering this. There are soooo many kids out there who need a loving stable home and family.
    Keep us informed of how it's going and if I can be of any help please feel free to pm me. Tyusclan momma (Kelley)
     
  9. Terri

    Terri Singletree & Weight Loss & Permaculture Moderator Staff Member Supporter

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    I adoptedd a sibling group of 2, and it cost us $1,500. They have medicare cards for whatever our insurance does not cover, and there IS a stipend.

    The stipend helps to take the sting out of the extra costs, because they both are SORT of special needs. By that I mean they need a few things that a healthier child would not need, such as hearing aids and frequent doctors visits and such.
     
  10. mpillow

    mpillow Well-Known Member Supporter

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    Our child was considered special needs because the mother was MR and the father was a convicted sex offender of limited intelligence. It came under background info. and you only have to meet one of the criterea...most kids do because I think being a victim of any form of abuse (as most are) create emotional and behavioral issues.
     
  11. Sherri C

    Sherri C Plays with yarn

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    I would also suggest that you do some reading about attachment, bonding, and other issues involved with adopting older children. Deborah Gray is a good author. Sometimes these children have issues that take more than just lots of love to repair. IMO it's a good idea to hope for the best but plan for the worst. Good luck!
     
  12. newatthis

    newatthis Well-Known Member

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    We are in central wi and are in the middle of doing a state adoption.
    We have our paper work done and are waiting for our homestudy to get done.
    If you go through LSS (Lutheran Social Services) or CC (Chatholic Charities) or any other private agency you may get a healthy baby but will pay between $15,000 and $30,000 depending where you get it from...(a different country or here in WI)
    We are going through the state. They give us a small amount of money to help with any medical fees the children may incure. We are doing the special needs adoption.
    These are not the "gerber babies" everyone wants. These kids are from ages 1-10 is our limit. They have been taken from their homes due to cercumstances that are not good for the child. Some have been given up but are older than the "little one" that everyone wants. Some have physical problems and some have emotional problems.
    you can pm me and I'll give you who to get ahold of since we are in the same region of wI.

    tammie
     
  13. newatthis

    newatthis Well-Known Member

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    We are in central wi and are in the middle of doing a state adoption.
    We have our paper work done and are waiting for our homestudy to get done.
    If you go through LSS (Lutheran Social Services) or CC (Chatholic Charities) or any other private agency you may get a healthy baby but will pay between $15,000 and $30,000 depending where you get it from...(a different country or here in WI)
    We are going through the state. They give us a small amount of money to help with any medical fees the children may incure. We are doing the special needs adoption.
    These are not the "gerber babies" everyone wants. These kids are from ages 1-10 is our limit. They have been taken from their homes due to circumstances that are not good for the child. Some have been given up but are older than the "little one" that everyone wants. Some have physical problems and some have emotional problems.
    you can pm me and I'll give you who to get ahold of since we are in the same region of wI.

    tammie
     
  14. Traci Ann

    Traci Ann Domestic Engineer

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    Go to NACAC - http://www.nacac.org/subsidy_stateprofiles.html for more info on what the states provide for assistance and what is considered special needs.

    If you are adopting special needs children - specificially older ones - reading this blog is helpful in understanding the range of needs - she also has many links to other adoptive mamas... She was also our AAN advocate and helpped us find our children...
    http://thebodiebunch.blogspot.com/
     
  15. Traci Ann

    Traci Ann Domestic Engineer

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    Also we did not foster to adopt from the state but rather are adopting straight from the state without the risk of the children being removed from our home. We will still be under 6 months supervision, then finalization, but this is a guaranteed adoption.
     
  16. bluefish

    bluefish Wait................what?

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    Most definetly go for it, but be prepared to wait a while. We have been trying to adopt special needs kids for four years and haven't gotten ANYwhere. We just finally got our first foster kids last year. Wanting to take older kids should help, tho. Our age limit was 12.
     
  17. prairiebird

    prairiebird Well-Known Member

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    We just finalized adopting our two first two foster children. Wow! What a ride :angel:

    It is a major hassle working *with* the system...but worth it. See us here...
    http://www.acitysetuponahill.com/familypages.htm
    (I've not posted the bios on our new additions as yet as it was illegal until finalization).

    God is good to give us such wonderful gifts!

    Blessings,
    robin
     
  18. longshadowfarms

    longshadowfarms Well-Known Member

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  19. wendys_goats

    wendys_goats wendys_goats

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    Thank you everyone for your help. I really apperciate it. I will check into all the sites that are provided.
    God Bless