What would you do? advice please

Sustainable Joy · #1 03/28/08, 04:45 PM

My DH is the greatest. I love him like the cat loves the cream jar. Unfortunately, we don't see eye to eye on prepping. He sees the economy falling to pieces, but he has an unshakable belief that our family will do just fine because we are frugal.

He balks (to put it mildly) at spending any money on prepping. But he has made allowances in our family budget for me to buy myself something to celebrate my weight loss milestones (I'm in Weight Watchers). He has also budgeted $30 a month for me to spend on hair care products.

I am trying to surruptitiously get some preps together without arousing too much suspicion from him... because when I spent my hair budget money on some vitamin supplements, he took the budget away.

So I don't want to fill him in on this too much.

For my next milestone I've decided to use the Gurney's coupon they sent me; you get $25 worth of products free when you buy $25 of stuff. I'm gonna use it to get the 2fer plant packs of perennials (2 blueberry bushes for the price of 1, but they choose which variety) I plan to get: rhubarb, blueberry, raspberry and strawberry plants.

I have a little water stored, I have a pressure canner, but no mason jars yet, and I have some BOB stuff I put together.

What would you do with the $30/month hair care budget? I can cut myself down to probably $5 a month if I use the *cheapest* possible things.

Oh, and please don't trash my hubby. I love him very much, and it's not easy on him taking care of a family on one income in the pricey Northeast.

AngieM2 · #2 03/28/08, 04:55 PM

Somewhere there's a list of prep on $5 a week or month... and a list of things to get. The list is a bit old (y2K stuff), but if you did $10 a month, it would be a start.

And LEARN about what you could do with what is already there.
And can you get a sudden urge to garden?

Remember, in this case, you have new hobbies

I'll see if I can find that $5 list.

Angie

Dr. Mom · #3 03/28/08, 05:04 PM

Prepping consists of more than just food items. I have stocked up on quite a bit of shampoo, soap, shaving cream, razors, laundry detergent, etc. Could you use some of your hair care budget for things like that to start off with? Then work your way up from there. I have a feeling your DH will come around pretty soon. When he sees how much you can save when you stock up on food items on sale and in bulk he will be amazed. The pressure canner isn't much good without jars. Buy food in bulk when you can, start canning, and save a ton of $$! Your plants from Gurneys are a great start. Good luck!

AngieM2 · #4 03/28/08, 05:09 PM

I've pulled up a thread about a "$20 challenge"
and
"how do I get started" which also has links to other sites and more threads here.

Angie

Beaners · #5 03/28/08, 05:19 PM

The weekly shopping guide I go by follows:

Quote:

Week 1 Nuts--get them on sale after Christmas. Drug stores are often
a good source. Dry roasted keep best. Freeze bagged ones. 21 lbs. per
person

Week 2 Detergents, Bleaches, Cleansers. Bleach 1 gal per person,
Laundry soap, 20 lbs per person.

Week 3 Medicine Chest: feminine products, Pepto bismol, cough syrup,
Tylenol, Calamine lotion, Kaopectate, Ipecac, sun screen, etc.
Dispose of all outdated medications

Week 4 Canned meats: Tuna, Spam, Dried Beef

Week 5 First Aid supplies: Band aids, antibiotic ointment, Ace
bandages, steri-strips, etc.

Week 6 Fill your water jugs

Week 7 Peanut butter 10 lbs per person

Week 8 Solid vegetable shortening lbs. per person

Week 9 Juices. Avoid watered products. Get 100% juice.

Week 10 Toothpaste, floss, razors, shaving cream

Week 11 Mixes, cake, pancake, muffin, etc. Purchase or make your own.
counts for part of grain requirement. you need an annual total of 300
lbs of grain products per person.

Week 12 Spices and herbs---look for bargains at health food stores or
ethnic food stores.

Week 13 Rice buy 10, 15, or 20 pounds. Counts toward grain total

Week 14 More First Aid: gauze patches, swabs. cotton balls, tape,
etc.

Week 15 Pasta. Select a variety. Counts toward grain total

Week 16 Dry Milk. 100 lbs per person per year

Week 17 - Assemble emergency sewing kit: thread, pins, needles,
buttons, snaps, zippers, tape measure, scissors.

Week 18 - Flour. Consider your families needs. 50 lbs per person?
counts toward grain

Week 19 - Dry or canned soup

Week 20 - Gelatin or Pudding mixes

Week 21 - Buy garden seeds locally, if you haven't mail ordered them.
Get only what you will plant and eat. Also consider what you can
preserve and eat.

Week 22 - More Flour! 50 lbs per person total.. counts toward grains

Week 23 - Cord, twine or light rope. Flashlights and batteries.

Week 24 - Freeze cheese. Grate and freeze for casseroles or soups.

Week 25 - Paper towels, aluminum foil, garbage bags. freezer bags,
etc.

Week 26 - Vinegars: If you make pickles, have several gallons on hand

Week 27 - Condiments: mustard, mayo, relish, Worcestershire

Week 28 - Jams and jellies. Buy what you will not make yourself.

Week 29 - Canned goods. Buy what you eat. veggies: lbs. per person,
fruits,: 80 quarts per person

Week 30 - Canned milk Check Dec 1989 Ensign for use Ideas

Week 31 - Back to school supplies and office supplies

Week 32 - Baking powder, soda, cornstarch. Baking soda 2 lbs per
person, soda albs per

Week 33 - Tomatoes juice, sauce, whole or paste. Buy it or make it.
part of veggies

Week 34 - Canned Fruit, buy or can 80 quarts per person

Week 35 - More canned fruits and veggies 150 total per person per
year

Week 36 - Buy an extra 25 pounds of sugar 100lbs per person total

Week 37 - Can or freeze veggies from garden or fresh purchased, or
buy more canned 150 lbs per person per year

Week 38 - Dried beans, peas. 100 lbs per person

Week 39 - Sweeteners. Honey, Molasses, etc. counts toward sugars

Week 40 - Iodized Salt. Ten or more containers. For canning use, get
canning salt.

Week 41 - Personal products: soap, deodorant, toilet paper, shampoo,
etc. Hand soap, 15 per person, TP: one roll per week

Week 42 - Canned soups: counts toward veggies

Week 43 - Can something with apples.

Week 44 - Hard candy for Halloween. Leftovers will make a good
addition to your 72 hour emergency kit.

Week 45 - Vitamins. Get some extra C and Calcium. 365 vitamins per
person.

Week 46 - Treats for baking: Cocoa, coconut, nuts, chocolate chips,
etc

Week 47 - Rolled oats, corn meal, cream of wheat...Part of grains

Week 48 - Sugars, brown, white, powdered. counts toward 100lbs per
person total

Week 49 - Vegetable and olive oils. Get a good quality. 12 lbs. per
person

Week 50 - Candles and matches. Put in a cool place and in a sturdy box
(preferably fireproof) that you can locate in the dark.

Week 51 - Popcorn. Go for the big bags. Counts toward grains

Week 52 - Merry Christmas. Give yourself a great gift--security for
an extended period.

Can you try to say things are "hobbies" rather than things that have to do with prep?

Kayleigh

Sustainable Joy · #6 03/28/08, 05:55 PM

Thanks for the replies and the helpful shopping list.

I already have begun gardening, and he supports it. But he's getting antsy that we've spent so much on buying soil, pots, seeds, 2 mini-greenhouses, a grow light, etc... and still no food has been produced!

We already buy in bulk and squeeze every penny on our grocery budget... there's no way to have a 1-income family in NJ any other way... unless you are a multi-millionaire!

He doesn't sweat too much what I put on the grocery list, especially since now I cook on weeknights. So there's some flex in there for me to ask for things that can be stored.

The pressure canner was a Christmas present I asked for. He can't believe how high the jars are, so I'll ask for some jars for Mother's Day or my birthday in June.

ITA that prepping is more than having stuff on hand... it also includes knowledge. For my first weight loss milestone I got like 10 books on half.com. I got a guide to locating and catching local freshwater fish, a how-to clean/cook/can/freeze fish, a book on healing with plants, a small farm management book, a guide to keeping a horse in the backyard, 2 SHTF survival books, a small survival book for the BOBs, a guide to keeping critters away from our crops, and a gardening guide. Spent $35, and I think it's worth every nickel!

Freeholder · #7 03/28/08, 06:14 PM

You might be able to find jars cheap at yard sales or thrift shops. You'd still have to buy the lids, but they don't cost all that much. Just check each jar before you buy and make sure there are no nicks in the rim or cracks anywhere.

I would 1. work on the garden, see how much you can get out of it this year, and document so you can show DH how much you've saved there. Maybe that will allow you to budget a little more for seeds, tools, etc., for next year.

2. Keep track of rising prices, and see if you can get hubby to understand that it would help the budget in the long run to buy some things in bulk now before they go up even more. Might wait on wheat and such until this summer, as grain prices ought to go down a bit unless there's a bad crop.

3. Buy your toiletries and such at the dollar store if you can, and use the extra money for other preps that you need -- I think you've already been doing this pretty much.

4. Shop for clothing, tools, and such at yard sales, thrift shops, and second-hand stores. Don't buy anything new unless you have to.

5. Learn to forage for wild foods. Even if you are in town you should be able to do that to some extent. Next time you have a chance to buy a book, get The Forager's Harvest -- it's the best wild food book I've seen so far. Take the children and teach them as you go. Is there any place nearby where you could go fishing? Maybe you could get inexpensive fishing outfits for yourself and any children who are old enough (licenses can be expensive, though).

6. Take up useful hobbies, like refinishing old furniture and re-upholstering. (These can bring in extra cash, too.) Learn to sew, or decorate cakes (another extra cash bringer). Babysit for a working mom if your husband doesn't mind. One or two extra children shouldn't be too much, and would give you some money you could spend as you see fit. Grow seedlings to sell to your neighbors as they start to take up gardening (your mini-greenhouses would work for this, and it would cover the cost of your seeds and then some, probably). There are lots of other possibilities, but maybe this will give you some ideas. The main thing is to think outside the box!

Kathleen

Cindy in NY · #8 03/28/08, 06:25 PM

If you post a "want" on Freecycle for canning jars, you will likely get a bunch - for free!! Then all you'll need to buy are rings and lids.

Texas_Plainsman · #9 03/28/08, 06:28 PM

You need to get hubby and yourself socializing with a family, or organization, that is prepping.

Sustainable Joy · #10 03/28/08, 06:29 PM

Those are great ideas, Kathleen!

I do sew a bit, but not enough to charge anyone. But I sew my own skirts, which helps save money.

I'm trying to find a babysitting job by posting on craigslist. Unfortunately every other SAHM in the state has the same idea! Hopefully I get a position soon. That would help a lot with bills, and I told him if I get a position I'm setting some aside each month for preps.

I definately point out the high food prices to him... he sees them himself. I did get him to agree to purchase lots of fresh food in season this summer to dehydrate, freeze, and can. We can't grow much this year...we're in an apt growing in pots on the patio, plus our little greenhouses take up half the dining room, lol.

Kids are 2.5yo and 7mo, so they are not quite able to help me too much. LOVE the idea of foraging.

One book I want to get is Gardening When It Counts...sounds intriguing.

njmama · #11 03/28/08, 06:30 PM

Don't eat the fish out of the lakes around here unless it is life or death! hahaha

Sustainable Joy · #12 03/28/08, 06:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Texas_Plainsman

You need to get hubby and yourself socializing with a family, or organization, that is prepping.

Where would I find such people?

Sustainable Joy · #13 03/28/08, 06:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by njmama

Don't eat the fish out of the lakes around here unless it is life or death! hahaha

I know, right! I actually know a family in Trenton that lost the mother when she ate a fish she caught... I bought those books on finding fish cuz we *may* end up moving someplace less toxic someday!

njmama · #14 03/28/08, 06:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sustainable Joy

I know, right! I actually know a family in Trenton that lost the mother when she ate a fish she caught... I bought those books on finding fish cuz we *may* end up moving someplace less toxic someday!

Oh good. There has been some nasty stuff dumped in them over the years. I would imagine those in our area would be better off with squirrels. There is certainly an abundance of them.

countrymouse2b · #15 03/28/08, 06:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sustainable Joy

Where would I find such people?

Pray LOL Seriously, the first person I ever met who was a prepper~I met her through Freecycle when she answered the ONLY ad she had ever answered for some clothing I had listed. We are now becoming great friends.

Then dh has met someone at work of all places! They're out there!

shellycoley · #16 03/28/08, 08:08 PM

Phrases used such as "ask for" and "allowed" make your husband sound rather controlling.
You sound responsible enough not to be blowing the mortage payment on wheat berries.
Maybe you should invite him to read this forum?

Shelly

**Terri** · #17 03/28/08, 10:38 PM

Joy, how about looking at the food budget?

You can build up a considerable pantry by buying an extra when it is on sale, and putting the extra food on a shelf in the laundry room.

Sustainable Joy · #18 03/29/08, 12:52 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by shellycoley

Phrases used such as "ask for" and "allowed" make your husband sound rather controlling.
You sound responsible enough not to be blowing the mortage payment on wheat berries.
Maybe you should invite him to read this forum?

Shelly

Oh, gosh, I can see how it might sound that way, but he really is the total opposite of controlling. We divide up the household labor, and he's really good with accounting and computers. He's devised a very comprehensive budget that will allow us to not only live, but save for our future, on one income. He shows me the budgets on the computer, but I'm like

I get confused. He manages that side of things very well. Its not like he's buying stuff for himself and saying no to preps so he can waste money on fluff. He spoils me and the kids while he goes without things. For instance he's been wearing the same boots since 1997, and boy does it show!

When say I ask for something for the groceries, it's because HE does the grocery shopping, even though I'm a SAHM. He takes our daughter 2.5yo with him to 4 or 5 different grocery stores every Saturday, as he picks up each item at the store where it will be cheapest. He does this so I can have at least that little time a week to myself (sortof, cuz I still have the 7mo here) to relax some. So every Saturday he says "What do you want from the grocery"? and I give him a list. That's what I meant by "asking for" food.

I could see how it might have made him sound controlling or mean. Nothing could be further from the truth.

And I always tell him he should check out this forum. He spends most of his computer time playing games, on a political forum, and looking at emmmm... artistic nudes.

AngieM2 · #19 03/29/08, 08:58 AM

S. Joy - I think your number one prep item would be to learn to read those financials he's showing you. Hope it never happens, but if something happened to him, you'd be up a creek with a paddle that you didn't know how to use to keep your family together.

Angie

**Terri** · #20 03/29/08, 09:01 AM

That DOES sound better!!!!!!!!!!!:baby04:

Then again, accidents happen and nobody lives forever. How will you pay your bills and collect insurance if (God forbid) your husband dies? You do not have to learn to pay bills online, but, you MUST! know how to handle the finances if he dies!

Because this world is not safe, and accidents happen!