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View Poll Results: How much of your life do you OWN(accept responsibility,etc.)
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20%
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1.69% |
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40%
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0 |
0% |
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60%
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4 |
6.78% |
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80%
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19 |
32.20% |
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100%
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35 |
59.32% |
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09/01/11, 06:17 PM
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Five of Seven
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Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Arkansas Ozarks
Posts: 3,048
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How much of your life do you OWN?
On another discussion board I was talking to a 19-year old "boy" who is angry and blames the whole world for his situation. He complains because he can't get any girls' numbers and doesn't have any friends and he says that makes him angry. I(along with several other people) suggested that maybe he has it backwards. Maybe the reason he can't get any numbers is because he walks around angry all the time and blames the world for HIS problems.
When I was about 17 I used to be fairly angry, but I realized that what happens to me in my life is often the result of the way I act, so I changed. Amazingly, my life changed after I did. Who'da thunk it? 
Anyway, if you had to assign a percentage(approximate) of how much you OWN your life(as in claim responsibility, work on the problems, etc.) what percentage would you claim? I realize nobody is 100% responsible for their life, but I also think nobody is 0% responsible.
I also just finished War and Peace, and the last few pages of the book were discussing how much of history is inevitable and how much is subject to the will of men.
__________________
"I don't want everyone to like me; I should think less of myself if some people did."
— Henry James
Last edited by FourDeuce; 09/01/11 at 06:21 PM.
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09/01/11, 06:39 PM
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Join Date: Dec 2004
Posts: 5,522
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I don't know, I figure I'm 100% responsible for my choices and responsibilities. I haven't blamed or slacked for many, many years. I have kids, and we run a business, so I don't have any choice but to 'own' my choices and responsibilities. I sure as hell can't blame my parents or husband or anyone else...
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09/01/11, 07:36 PM
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Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Ohio
Posts: 2,277
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I'm 100% responsible for my own choices, and while stuff happens that's out of my control, I'm 100% responsible for what I do with it.
__________________
"Don't confront me with my failures, I had not forgotten them." - Jackson Browne.
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09/01/11, 07:44 PM
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Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: W Mo
Posts: 9,269
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I voted 80%. I do take responsibility and "OWN" all my actions and my decisions. However parts of my life are shaped by circumstances outside my control - employer, laws, etc. These parameters limit the choices one can make to some degree. Also I am married and live with the consequences of some joint decisions that would likely have been different had they been my decision alone to make. Not saying that's bad, that's just how it is.
__________________
It is still best to be honest and truthful; to make the most of what we have; to be happy with the simple pleasures and to be cheerful and have courage when things go wrong.
Laura Ingalls Wilder
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09/01/11, 07:46 PM
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Dallas
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Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: N of Dallas, TX
Posts: 10,119
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I'm 55 now, and I'm responsible 100% anything my parents started me off with was 35+ years ago. I'm responsible for having the job I do, so if I don't like it, its on me.
I'm responsible for the DW I married so if there's something I don;t like againt its on me.
100%
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09/01/11, 08:08 PM
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Join Date: May 2011
Location: SW Missouri
Posts: 8,009
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I think if the choices were in small increments between 80% & 100% you'd find that most people would be around 95%, understanding that "acts of God", and random acts of others cannot be avoided. However, most people will vote 100% (on this site) relating to their decisions and responsibilites. I mean, how many people "homestead" who don't expect to be responsible.
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09/01/11, 08:11 PM
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Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: VA
Posts: 6,971
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bluesky
I'm 100% responsible for my own choices, and while stuff happens that's out of my control, I'm 100% responsible for what I do with it.
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This, and I am teaching responsibility to my children too. Always have.
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09/01/11, 08:22 PM
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Waste of bandwidth
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Join Date: May 2003
Location: OK
Posts: 10,618
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About 98 percent is up to God, but it's my responsibility to react accordingly.
The other 2 percent is random fate, or cats just jacking with me.
__________________
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Less barking! More wagging!
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09/01/11, 09:05 PM
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Banned
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Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 7,802
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MO_cows
I voted 80%. I do take responsibility and "OWN" all my actions and my decisions. However parts of my life are shaped by circumstances outside my control - employer, laws, etc. These parameters limit the choices one can make to some degree. Also I .... live with the consequences of some joint decisions that would likely have been different had they been my decision alone to make. Not saying that's bad, that's just how it is.
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This ^^^
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09/02/11, 01:53 AM
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Murphy was an optimist ;)
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Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: Kentucky
Posts: 21,492
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I opted for a hundred percent because there wasnt a choice for 99 percent. I figure there was bound to be some genetic "choices" made that were beyond my control which created some of my limitations in life, but basically I have always made my decisions, and accept full responsibility for them.
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"Nothing so needs reforming as other peoples habits." Mark Twain
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09/02/11, 03:00 AM
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Singletree Moderator
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Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: North Alabama
Posts: 8,845
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I had to choose 80 percent since there wasn't a 90% and doctors still have the luxury of burying their goof ups a lot of the time.
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"I didn't have time to slay the dragon. It's on my To Do list!"
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09/02/11, 04:17 AM
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tom
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Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: mid michigan
Posts: 606
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8o% it wasnt my choice to be a disabled vet at 45(47 now).it was my choice to join the army,but didnt think or now i would have been in 3 conflicts.the conflicts wernt by my doing,but i did it.
tom
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to understand reality,one must define the concept of fantasy
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09/02/11, 07:15 AM
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Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: Louisiana
Posts: 3,604
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At 17, it wasn't a lot of problem to get a girl's phone number... 
I was working as much as I could while going to school, trying to pay for my wheels and the gas to go in it. When courting young ladies, it helps to have a nice set of wheels and a bit of jingle in your pocket.
It also helps to be considerate and nice to them.
The hardest part is cutting one out from the herd. At that age, girls tend to be herd animals and you'll always suffer at the hands of a group. Get them off by themselves, let them do some of their own thinking, and let their own personality shine through...then you can enjoy each other's company and have a bit of fun together.
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09/02/11, 08:57 AM
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Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: South Georgia Swamp
Posts: 462
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I am so glad you brought this subject up. I have three teenage boys and was trying to explain to my middle one the other day that we are responsible for what happens in our lives. He is one of these kids that ALWAYS blames someone else for his problems. I voted 90% because some things are out of our control. I see many many people that don't want to accept responsibility for what happens in their lives. I look back on my life and think about the mistakes I made or actions I took that have affected me. I goofed off in highschool so couldn't get into a good college, got my HS girlfriend pregnant so instead of even trying to go to college I joined the military to support my new young family. Cheated on my Wife and got caught and got divorced. Had to get out of the military to raise my Son (yes I got custody). So here I was at almost 30 and my only job skill was Marine Corps infantry. Got remarried to a girl with two children. We now have to work our fingers to the bone everyday to baely scrape by. When I have a ill come due that I can't pay I don't blame my employer for not giving me a pay raise. He pays me what I am worth. I don't blame my Parents or techers for not pushing me hard enough or giving me a bad grade on a test. They all tried very hard. I was just a bad kid. I don't blame my ex wife for leaving me, I cheated, I was an idiot. The road my life has taken was shaped by my actions not anyone elses. I am kind of happy that I made these mistakes thouh. When I am trying to lecture my boys about life I have real world, practical experience to use as an example.
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09/02/11, 09:20 AM
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Join Date: Sep 2003
Location: Southwest Ohio
Posts: 1,583
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Oggie
About 98 percent is up to God, but it's my responsibility to react accordingly.
The other 2 percent is random fate, or cats just jacking with me.
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We own two cats - or rather, they own us - and a dog and a horse, so I would be in the 20 percent range for actually determining my course in life.
Marginal humor aside, this poll is good because it forces me to examine my attitudes and improve them. So I'm marking 100 percent with the idea of living up to that in owning my choices. Thanks, FourDeuce.
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09/02/11, 11:35 AM
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fuzzball in the Cascades
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Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: State of Jefferson
Posts: 633
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I am responsible for all my actions. I wish I could blame others for some of the stupid things I have done, but it still comes back to me. Sigh,
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I am me. I like me. Please don't try to change me.
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09/02/11, 02:38 PM
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Five of Seven
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Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Arkansas Ozarks
Posts: 3,048
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In case anybody's wondering, this is the post that got me thinking about the poll:
MAYBE YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT THE *beep* YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT!! MAYBE BECAUSE YOU'RE ONE OF THOSE PEOPLE IN LIFE WHO HAVE EVERY *beep* THING THEY WANT! A NICE CAR, MONEY, AND OF COURSE A WOMAN, PEOPLE LIKE YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND A *beep* THING ABOUT WHAT PEOPLE LIKE ME HAVE TO GO THROUGH, SO DON'T TELL ME!!!!!!!!!!!
That's what the 19-year-old posted when I suggested that maybe his attitude has something to do with his problems. Can anybody else see what I saw? 
__________________
"I don't want everyone to like me; I should think less of myself if some people did."
— Henry James
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09/02/11, 04:25 PM
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fuzzball in the Cascades
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Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: State of Jefferson
Posts: 633
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I don't know what you saw 4/2, but I see someone who is short on vocabulary.
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I am me. I like me. Please don't try to change me.
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09/02/11, 04:27 PM
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Join Date: Dec 2004
Posts: 5,522
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Oh yeah, I can see it.
And I could think of many, many little ways to pick apart his argument, but I doubt you'd get an honest answer to any of them.
I'd start off by asking what he means by the phrases 'people like you' and 'people like me'. What's so special about him? KWIM?
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09/03/11, 10:18 PM
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Join Date: May 2002
Posts: 7,692
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Quote:
Originally Posted by FourDeuce
He complains because he can't get any girls' numbers and doesn't have any friends and he says that makes him angry. .
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Silly boy, still hasnt figured out that more people in your life means more problems. Especially if those people happen to be of the female persuasion.....
__________________
"What would you do with a brain if you had one?" -Dorothy
"Well, then ignore what I have to say and go with what works for you." -Eliot Coleman
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