Serious question, lookin' for serious answer

Laura Zone 5 · #1 09/21/12, 07:27 AM

On another thread, the question was asked "why do folks...."
Part of my answer was that there are "red necks".
I then gave "my" definition of "red neck".

Quote:

Doesn't realize a woman has a face, says lewd and grossly inappropriate things to a female he just met, has zero manners or social skills (the ability to have an intelligent conversation about ANYTHING), cat calls every woman that walks by with his tongue hanging out like a dog and he actually thinks women are attracted to this.......
Has no respect for any one or their property. Really in general to me a red neck is any human being that has no respect for themselves or others.

Then I posted what *I* thought was "red neck behavior"

Quote:

I am grocery shopping. Shorts and a sweatshirt. Just your average plain Jane. Guy walks by, looks in my cart and says "wow, you're organized, I like that".
I smiled and said "thank you". I thought "um ewww don't be creepin' on my cart, and I don't care what YOU like".
Go on about my shopping.....
Go thru the self check out lane, walk to my vehicle, back out.
All the sudden this white Jeep Cherokee (yeah, I wrote down the plate make model and year) blocks me.
It's Captain Creepy from inside.
He pulls up next to my van (as I draw my purse nearer to me, lock my doors, one hand on the horn the other hand ready) and motions for me to put my window down.
I cracked it 1/3 of the way down.
He says "Just wanted you to know you have really nice legs".
My smile now is a smirk, with one eye cocked. My body language is clear.
I said "thank you" and rolled my window up.
As I am driving out of the lot so is he and I am watching him........

So yeah, that to me was a red neck move.
Really? Do guys REALLY pick up women that way?
AND REALLY WOMEN......that's all it takes these days? A couple of compliments and in the sack ya go??

Now comes my serious question.
This dude was between 40-50 (closer to 50)

Is this the way 'men' approach women today?
Is this the approach women are looking for??

Oh please help me!!

mountainwmn · #2 09/21/12, 07:42 AM

We got a lot of rednecks here and I've never been approached like that. Hmmm. Maybe I don't have nice enough legs. I would call that a Creeper.
I should add that over here a redneck is a country kinda thing. Big trucks, bonfires, trying to shoot bumblebees with a 22, that kind of thing.

mercedes · #3 09/21/12, 07:42 AM

I don't think that a "man" would approach a woman that way.I think that was a stalker and that you should have called the police!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Laura Zone 5 · #4 09/21/12, 07:44 AM

Can someone define "Red Neck" for me? Please?

NoClue · #5 09/21/12, 08:05 AM

So one evening, before my divorce, I'm sitting in the family room sipping on a cup of herbal tea and listening to a Bach cello concerto and my wife comes up to me and announces "You're such a redneck!". I put my tea down, tunded the music off, and asked "What?". "Your pocket knife - only rednecks carry knives like that." "Ok, then I'm a redneck," I shrugged, picked up my tea and turned the music back on.

I honestly have no idea what 'redneck' means - something to do with reveling in the mundane and country aspects of life or something.

Brokeneck · #6 09/21/12, 08:13 AM

That is definitely not the way to get a "GOOD" woman..... For instance had it been me that was in the grocery store that day and if I had noticed a pretty lady such as you shopping, my first move probably would have been to make sure we were hitting the aisles at the same pace but in opposite directions. That way there would be a chance of eye contact multiple times... I would check on the first pass to see if a wedding ring is present, Second pass would be just a sweet smile, probably by the third time we passed and hopefully made eye contact a few steps farther a glance back to see if she was looking would be appropriate... This would only be a quick look, not to check out her butt or anything but to just see if she showed any interest... By the fourth pass if her smile was bigger or eye contact was longer I would know if she was looking for a casual "Hello" If not I would change directions and leave the pretty lady alone to not be the creepy guy in the grocery store. But if her hello back was with a friendly smile and long eye contact I would assume that by the time we checked out I could ask to give her my cell phone number so she could call me if she would like to make it easier for her to be comfortable with meeting a stranger. This should only be done near other people so she didnt feel vulnerable, No contact in the parking lot after unless made by her. A guy should never ask a girl for her number.... It puts un-needed pressure on her and any further contact with her should be of her choice at a time of her convenience.
P.S. I think your deffinition of Red-Neck is pretty much spot on!

cindilu · #7 09/21/12, 08:17 AM

I would not describe that as a redneck move, I would describe that as a stocker creeper move. As in scary as in you are smart t get the license plate number and all.

Prismseed · #8 09/21/12, 08:41 AM

Some guys are just utterly awkward and clumsy around women. I doubt I would follow a woman out to the parkinglot but I have praised a woman's legs before.

Prismseed · #9 09/21/12, 08:46 AM

Redneck is a sleeveless shirt and a pinch of chew.

Redneck is a sun burnt neck from plowing.

Redneck is mudding tires on a pickup.

Redneck is a camouflage cellphone.

Redneck is barefeet and overalls.

Redneck is confederate flag in the front yard cause the south just might rise again.

Redneck is coon hunting and sniping groundhogs.

Redneck is a pair of imitation testicles hanging off the bumper of your truck.

Redneck is NASCUR the u is very important.

zong · #10 09/21/12, 08:50 AM

Redneck is a putdown of poor white people. Similar to "white trash" or "hillbilly"

NoClue · #11 09/21/12, 08:59 AM

I can't say conclusively that the guy wasn't a redneck, but his behavior was that of a creep, which is something completely different

nehimama · #12 09/21/12, 09:04 AM

Ugh! Creepy! Redneck or not, that was just plain CREEPY!

Prismseed · #13 09/21/12, 09:06 AM

Quote:

Redneck is a putdown of poor white people. Similar to "white trash" or "hillbilly"

Says you. Out here it's considered a badge of country boy pride.

Sort of like how blacks claimed 'nigga'.

zong · #14 09/21/12, 09:08 AM

When poor white people call each other rednecks, its a badge of honor. When city slickers and such call poor white people "redneck" it's a putdown. I have to assume someone unsure of the meaning certainly wouldn't be one.

Prismseed · #15 09/21/12, 09:19 AM

What it is meant to be and what it is are two different things. Rednecks around here know what is intended, they just don't care (regardless who it comes from) because they know what it really is.

Though I suppose redneck culture is different in different places.

zong · #16 09/21/12, 09:21 AM

Around here, we know when we're being insulted.

haypoint · #17 09/21/12, 09:23 AM

I always seem to get myself in trouble playing the devil’s advocate, but here goes.
I make a point to keep myself in a cheerful mood. When I am at a grocery checkout, I try to say something nice to the cashier. “ Those are pretty ear rings you have on.”, “Your nails look nice, do you do them yourself?” A kind word to a stranger might brighten up their day. I’m not talking about striking up a conversation about my grandkids to a stranger in the produce aisle, just something nice. Never intended as a pick up line.
If your grocery cart was noticeably well arranged, I would think that you take pride in being an organized person. I would think that to compliment you in this totally non-personal way would be safe and perhaps reaffirm your personal pride in being organized. Might not be trying to pick you up.
A woman with nice legs in shorts and sweat shirt is attractive. I wouldn’t think of saying so to a total stranger, in a grocery store or other similar situation. But if I was driving out of the parking lot and you were in your car, I might see that differently. You are safe in your car, I’m in mine. There is no threat that I might attack you. It is broad daylight. A sincere compliment from a stranger you may never see again might be intended to be nice and not try to pick you up.
I’ve told young mothers, “ That is a beautiful baby you have, how old is she?” Most times they are eager to tell me what a good baby she is or some small talk. I’m not trying to pick anyone up or creap them out. I think it is just being nice.
It can get creepy if I speak with someone and then 20 minutes later, we end up next to each other in the checkout line.
I figure everyone is fighting their own battles. Everyone can use a compliment. It never occurred to me that being nice was repulsive.

momof2 · #18 09/21/12, 09:29 AM

What's wrong with confederate flags, camo anything and NASCAR???? You never know when you are gonna need a supply of confederate flags handy. Camo is the new black. NASCAR is in line with Alabama football for a southern pastime... we gotta have some driving skills for when we are muddin... barefoot in our camo... shootin anything that moves... bumblebees included.

Around here redneck isn't a putdown... it's just the opposite of country club. That creepy guy isn't what I would call redneck... just creepy... even rich country club types do dumb stuff like that. Here a "redneck" type guy is usually the most polite and gentlemanly type of guy. Yea, they may stare and make comments but they are harmless and would treat you like a lady if you were "their's." Redneck is just real country around here.

Prismseed · #19 09/21/12, 10:03 AM

Quote:

Around here, we know when we're being insulted.

Does that do anything besides make it easier to insult you?

Quote:

What's wrong with

Nothing at all.

Vickie44 · #20 09/21/12, 10:03 AM

I dont think redneck and country are the same . To me redneck implies more ego than brains and antiquated political and social views inherited from the not very well informed and never thought about again.

zong · #21 09/21/12, 10:13 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Prismseed

Does that do anything besides make it easier to insult you?

It neither does nor don't do anything. When somebody from the city or up north comes around with that sneer and says something about "bunch of rednecks" we understand that is an insult. What part of that are you having trouble with? Easy ain't got nothing to do with it. Nor does insulting. The key is "understand". We understand when we are being insulted. Understand is the verb, although it's been a really long time since I've been in grade school, I think that "being" in "being insulted" would be a past participle?

We also understand when somebody is trying to nitpick.

Prismseed · #22 09/21/12, 11:02 AM

Quote:

We also understand when somebody is trying to nitpick.

You are mistaken but we'll leave it lay at that.

elkhound · #23 09/21/12, 11:03 AM

zong its easy to spot people who dont know apple butter from hog turds too.they have their nose turned up......they have a lot to learn.

wyld thang · #24 09/21/12, 11:12 AM

first off, I use and think of redneck endearingly. yes I uderstand when it's used as an insult--any label can be used as an insult.

love that "shooting bumblebees with a .22"--that's exactly it, and why I love redneck ha!

Sure there are jerks. But there are a lot of guys who just want to say you have nice legs too. However awkward that comes across. I just smile say thank you, be a lady. I think one's response to the compliment which may come across as too forward has a lot to do with how things "progress", I find if I respond as a lady(acknowledging the compliment sweetly but not being a skank back) the guy tones it down and the conversation carries on in a nice way--not that I'm looking for anything, just that if I respect the human being, the respect comes back to me.

Another example is the homeless begging around here--a few people have asked me if I get the on and on long story argument/hassle/beatdown to give money. No I don't. I know your not supposed to make eye contact walking down the street--but, if someone does, I do, and smile--and actually I DO look and make eye contact and smile--"those people" are so invisible, thought of as not human... If they ask, I simply say I don't have it, because I don't have/carry cash. And I look them in the eye and smile, for real. If they got a great schtick going on--clever sign, song and dance etc, if I do have cash I will give a litte, cuz I'm a sucker for that. Always I compliment them on their awesomeness, joke awhile, and they forget to ask for money ha--sometimes if a McDonalds is handy I'll go buy some food and bring it back. The point is, treat someone like a human being, and more often that not you get it back--even when it starts out rough.

You did the right things to protect yourself just in case. But dont' let it make you think all guys are dogs.

BTW--yes I realize there are truly nasty people in this world. I have a few people in my life who have dealt with them (bus driver in the drug/psycho part of town, police chaplain in DC). They have come through years of dealing alright--they take no crap, yet they give the namaste and have come through nasty situations in a better way because of it.

Yvonne's hubby · #25 09/21/12, 11:12 AM

If you go shopping for wimmens at the corner grocery store.... you might just be a redneck.

If you think a forty something wearing shorts and a sweat shirt is "HOT"... you just might be a redneck.

If you can hit what yer aimin at..... at 20 yards spittin backer juice.... you just might be a redneck.

If you score with a forty something wearing shorts and a sweatshirt you met at the corner grocery store, cuz she was impressed with yer spittin talents.... she just might be a redneck.

zong · #26 09/21/12, 11:16 AM

I got to tell ya, I been around a long time. You don't shoot bumblebees, you shoot carpenter bees. Bumblebees never hurt anybody. And you use rat shot, too. Sometimes called "shot shell" More fun with a pistol with 3 or 4 buddies milling around doing the same.

Darren · #27 09/21/12, 11:23 AM

Rednecks in 1921 when it started. Are you anti-union?

Battle of Blair Mountain

elkhound · #28 09/21/12, 11:32 AM

redneck term goes back to year 1643

Redneck History

elkhound · #29 09/21/12, 11:37 AM

wyld thang..you know a lot of people considered the loggers and timber fallers rednecks in their oily tin pants and hickory shirts.....more need to take example of their work ethic and abilitys.

frogmammy · #30 09/21/12, 12:32 PM

Well, around here, we don't have rednecks, we have Hoosiers. The lowest of the low, lower than white trash.

And before anyone takes off on this...I was raised for a few years about 60 miles north of Indy. I know what a Hoosier is.

I think the whole thing is funny.

Mon