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Best Idea yet! Let the goats out when you have vertigo
I am soooo stupid sometimes. They were crying, I felt bad, I grabbed my walky stick and headed on out to let them loose for a bit. First thing Sammy Sheep does is get wedged int he gate, trying to come out before it is open. Several gentle whacks tot he head with the wealky stick didi NOT stop his mad dash. Now, the rest follow, goat prints all over my feet. At first, all is well...DD is in her pool and everyone stays next to me. And then...Sammy decides the grass is MUCH greener over THERE, Annie figures if Sammie is going, she needs to go to. ------ amd Smokie, good little angels are frantically trying to pull a tree over on themselves. I call to DD to give the wayward son and daughter a splash to bring them back...she throws a bucket of water over them. Now, they are confused, wet and mad. Ahhh, but here comes savior momma with her walkity stick, climbing up a hill this isn't very steep, but seems that way to me. I try to herd them back to the ohters. but since I can mostly only lean to the right, they are at frist confused, then highly amused. They kept dashing to the left like off the tracjk thorobreds. I finally circle then (and circkle them and circle them) and convince them to go join ------ and Smokie, who have now pulled a sizeable branch on themselves and are head butting each other over it, all one hudred leaves of it. Sammy says The Heck with YOU, I KNOW this grass was better up this hill. Annie is a tad confused...afraid to go near the buckety throwing pool, bullied out of her share of the leaves, and knowing her hero, Sammy is on top of the hill. Off we go again. I herd them back...and THIS is the point where someone decides to start setting off those little fire poppers, the ones that crack really loud? Smokie comes to the rescue, dragging a tree branch in his mouth (hey, no poppers are making me drop my treasure) amd ------ saunters on up, "Hey, what's the big deal?" Now, I am done. I stumble back to the barn with my walkity stick holding me up (don't ask about having to pee with vertigo and a walkity stick, I don't think those animals will ever be the same again.) Into the field I go, like the pied piper with a major attitude at this point...two come in, two run away. Thhen the other two come in, and Sammy ameks a break for it. Like an ark manned by insane people, they keeop running in and out two by two. Sammy is about 150 pound khatadin who thinks he is either God, or a puppy, depending on his mood. Ain't NO one falling for the grain barrell rattle trick, they know it is empty. Ah HA, I shouted, if I leave the gate open and crawl up to the hay space, they will all run inside the field and wait for their hay. Instead, they all met me at the hay stall door. Nowe I am inside, they are on the other side of the door OUTSIDE the pasture, giggling to see what my next move will be. Of course, there is a bale of hay wedguing the interiot door shut, and I found out various curse words do NOT amke it move. The idea of whacking them all unconscious with my walkity stick hits me, but since I lost it in the hay piles, this is a useless idea. Now I am stmnbling into walls, trying to open bales, tripping over lawn furniture (who puts LAWN FURITURE in a hay stall?) as I see 4 eager noses shoving under the door. Finally I got the hay, crawled BACK down into their pen, yelled, and they ran me over, oh, I mean ran over to me. Sammy...the only one who saw me bolting for the gate, trips me up to get there first, but I won. HAHA! The final leftwards lurch unbalanced him. I laugh insanely at them for about 5 minutes, then it hits me...did I bolt the interior door of the pen??? Wheile I figured out I had forgotten to do that, it hits me I left the hay stall door open as well. I am now firmly stuck in the hay door, since I don't have the balane to stand up.
Again, I am selling the followiong goats: Smokie, pygmy with wattles who is sleek as greased lightning, Annie, accident prone and overcome by hero worship with the sheep, also ------, who does pretty piouettes around falling tree branches, and Sammy the Demon sheep. Who thinks he is a lap dog at 150 pounds.
No hamsters, huh? How about gerbils? WIll take gr=erbils in trade, preferably dead so they are easier to manage.
And has any one seen my walkity stick??
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Becky
Last edited by beccachow; 06/11/11 at 09:20 PM.
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If you have a blog about your adventures I would so read it.
