What would you do?

There's nothing you can do about what he does. You only have control over yourself. Do the best you can to get out of this bad business relationship. It will probably be less painful to take the monetary hit now than to stretch it out longer. I know it's a lot of money, but getting a lawyer and going to court will probably end up costing more and you still won't get any money out of him. I've dealt with guys like this and now I can spot them a mile away. They are usually pretty much judgment proof.

If he's pressing for different terms she can present counter terms.
Deals change after the fact all the time.
Now though if one breaks a deal, though with out written documentation,word of mouth is not viable in the Judicial system, Unless you One Big trout or a even bigger Sucker... Written word is the only thing of weight...
back to breaking deals, with proper support the wronged party has recourse.
Though I have a feeling there is noting in writing?
If so the hogs are yours, he has no legal recourse.
With out a written agreement in any of this courts a waste of time, and being the plaintive if you file a weak complaint and loose could end up owing the others legal fees.
Now though we know not all things happen in the court room, nor can the police be proactive and vigilant...
You also have societal impact, J says S is a crook, 75% belive that and S has no friends.
The Police remark is why I implore you to involve a Male Friend or Family Member,
from what I read though not super in depth this guy takes advantage... people like that do not stand against those that they can not take advantage of.
I was not just talking of leg breaking, a strong person that he has little recoarse against would send him on his way.
I say figure the value of the pigs, the money recouped (though you where vested and any loss on sale yours.) from selling the building, anything left send it to him and be done with it.
Normally though you give a person a chance to right wrongs, I would say for the most part you have and he has shown little grace.

But it would be pretty pointless to make new terms with this guy. He's already shown that he isn't trustworthy to keep the terms of any deal he makes. Making a new agreement with him will only extend the misery of dealing with him. She's free to do that, but it's unlikely to end up any better. If it were me, getting him out of my life would be the priority.

hmmm,good lawyer gonna cost ya about $1500 to handle this. i'd offer $750 to cover costs(not labor)he hasn't done any.draw up a receipt,have him sign in front of a witness.u each get a copy.then put up posted signs.done.

well yes but no guarantee he would except, but it would be a chance to call him on his broken deals...

I might over feed them till death and send back half rotted if not...

again though I know this type, Nice in the front and not so much in the Back... gets their way fine, not and a different critter...

Nothing against women, though always are targets, same reason you don't take a car in for pro repair... I'm not sure how else to voice it?

Bill seems to be always padded?

I take it in different all together.

know what I mean?

Not a knock on mechanics but the shops they work in, though they should own it to some degree.

I'm not a psychologist and I don't practice counseling, but.....this man's behavior has shown all the signs of an abuser. Abusers come in all sizes and degrees, from bosses, boyfriends, neighbors, and even in business relationships. He has made a few inroads. Stop it now by having nothing more to do with him. period! He knows what he has been doing, and if you block him off, completely, he'll move on to another person who is more willing to be abused. Money on the table, lawyers or not, stop ALL contact with him, and he'll go away. Sure, he'll continue for awhile to test you, but he'll go away and play his game somewhere else.

My wife called these fellas, "sticky boogers"....no matter how much you rubbed your fingers together, they wouldn't come off.....

Just my own opinion.

geo

I think so. In regards to courts and legal fees some posters brought up up thread - eh, I'm not worried about that. Let's just say that this person has reason not to invite the bright light of the Justice system into their life. I'll probably carry my handgun with me for a bit, but I doubt he'd try to come on the property for the above reason. He seemed well-versed in the workings of no -trespassing, of that tells us anything. Lol

I will arrange for a big male friend to drop off 4 of the hogs and the pony at his barn later this week. I can't sell them as whole hogs quickly, and hog prices are low at the sale. Let him worry about it. I'll probably request reimbursement of $750 - half of the unfinished coop. Doubt I'll get it but worth a shot.

Sounds like a good plan.

If its not in writing, it didn't happen.


A lawyer is going to be a waste of money and time.



From now on any deals with other farmers are done on paper and signed and dated, even if its a restaurant napkin, even if its a friend.

Two words: Shot Gun

I think that's one word, and certainly not enough even if it's two. I suspect the complete sentence version would be very bad advice.

Fortunately, that can work in my favor as well. I'm a woman of my word. But if someone consistently demonstrates they're not going to deal honestly, Im not going to feel much obligation to keep their best interests in mind.

What you've described is typical of a woman whose existence has more to do with being fair/honest/kind than manipulative; and lots of people can easily take advantage of such a woman.

If I were in your shoes, which I never would be because I'm too cautious, I would sever all ties, including financial ones, taking whatever loss my naivate brought me. I wouldn't even take him thru the legal system because of the TIME and $$$ that would entail. No amount of money is worth the headache!

Count yourself fortunate you learned when you did and take that lesson with you throughout the rest of your life. We women need to think more with our heads than our hearts when dealing with others about such subjects as you and that man were involved with.

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That's a sexist assertion. I know plenty of men who are the same way. They wouldn't fall for it from another man. But they are painfully susceptible to falling for nonsense from a woman. Especially an attractive one.

This matter falls squarely into small claims territory. Attorney representation is not generally permitted in small claims court. Therefore, It would cost me maybe $50 to take it to court. But I'm not going to bother. If I could sell the hogs at the sale and make profit, I'd do it and simply keep the money. Hog prices are bad, though. So I will butcher the ones I have sold to customers and dump the rest in his barn.

Apparently, being a shyster runs in the family because this dude's dad burned the family of my hay guy. He's big and intimidating and delighted to drop the hogs at this idiot's barn

Might seem like a lot of money to you, but in all honesty to justify the trouble of a lawyer and court for me anyway it would take much more than a few thousand dollars. I have seen people get into deals like this before, but to be honest have never really understood why. From what I have seen there is plenty of blame to go around, he may in fact be no good, but you did not set out clear cut deals, and when the first deal did not meet your expectation, you made more deals, which would indicate to him you were OK with half done deals.

I am with the others, this is over, your money is gone, give the pigs back, lesson learned. Try to do better next time. There are many honest people who are just not good at doing business. not saying anything bad, it is just how things are. Not all bad people make good criminals, that is why so many are in jail, same deal. being a good person, does not make you a good business person. Admitting our weaknesses and asking someone to help us in them areas is the thing to do. No shame in getting someone to help you with these matters, be it a competent business man or woman.

"being a good person, does not make you a good business person. Admitting our weaknesses and asking someone to help us in them areas is the thing to do. No shame in getting someone to help you with these matters, be it a competent business man or woman."

Bingo. I'm reasonably competent in a lot of things, but I don't give it a second thought when I have to buy help for an area I am weak at. I might watch like a hawk just to see if I could do it in the future, but part of intelligence is recognizing the skills in others and honoring those skills and people.

Where is everyone getting the idea I'm getting a lawyer? And yes, I realize the money is gone. Which is why I'm keeping a couple of the hogs.

I think that's in response to people who suggested getting a lawyer, not in response to you specifically. There seem to be people here who jump to suing people or calling the police for every little thing. I think those are mostly city people, and also people who don't have much experience with our legal system or they wouldn't be so quick to involve it in their lives.

You need to write up some kind of agreement the reason you are taking the hogs is for restitution of theft of services or the money you paid him way back when was for the hogs and remove any doubt of ownership .Then meet him at the courthouse for him to sign it front of a notary and file it at the courthouse. I have had to deal with this before .Otherwise

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I would take pictures of the hogs being returned so you have it documented.

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