Advice??? Midlife Transition: From the suburbs to rural

wilded · #61 11/04/13, 05:18 PM

We just made the move to the country at 59. Here is a little about what we are experiencing in our new lives. http://wildedtx.blogspot.com/2013/10...-lampasas.html

LisaInN.Idaho · #62 11/04/13, 07:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jassar

I understand what you are saying and agree ... But, any ideas on how do we do that without lying? I mean won't it be natural for everyone we meet to ask where we are from?

I'm going to have to take the opposite side here and say that I haven't really seen a lot of people given a hard time here because they are from California. I know a bunch and they've been just fine.
The only Californians that I have an issue with are the ones who come here thinking this is a conservative nirvana and telling non-conservatives to stay away. Most people here are live and let live and while it might be a red state, it's also a pretty poor state and lots of people are on government assistance.

I would just be honest and be nice and don't act arrogant and you'll do fine.

We live north of Priest River near Priest Lake. We made the move in our late 30's and have never regretted it. We moved here from Arizona but are originally from back east.We built our own cabin and lived off grid for 8 years and finally grid tied 4 years ago. We finished raising our two daughters here and I think they will always call this beautiful area home.

maddy · #63 11/05/13, 06:41 AM

I understand what you are saying and agree ... But, any ideas on how do we do that without lying? I mean won't it be natural for everyone we meet to ask where we are from?

In this area (Eastern Washington--which is just a short distance from where you'll be living), it's very common for people to answer that question by saying, "We're from the coast." "The coast" is generally shorthand for everything west of the mountains, and it seems to have a fairly innocuous connotation that satisfies curiosity without raising any hackles.

Actually, in this area of the country there's a fair amount of influx from both the Seattle area and California. People are used to it, and quite often the people doing the asking either came from the coast themselves or have family members who live there. I doubt it will be as big a deal as you imagine. In fact, because this area has been especially hard hit by the economic downturn, many people have a welcoming (or at least tolerant) attitude toward anyone who comes into the area with money to spend or business skills to contribute. Since you'll be bringing a business of your own, you might check out the local chamber of commerce and get involved in that right away.

As others have pointed out, it's the Californians who immediately demand to know where the Starbucks is that seem to have problems.

badlander · #64 11/05/13, 07:06 AM

We ran into that when we fled IL. A lady once told me Missourians were worried about the influx of people moving in from the east with their big government Chicago way of thinking. I told her not to judge downstaters by Chicago standards. I couldn't speak for everyone but we were fleeing that way of life because we do cling to our guns and bibles and do believe in the US Constitution. She gave me a thoughtful look and nodded and said "good for you".

People respect honesty. I've never been treated anyway other than pleasant with our new town folk.

Laura Zone 10 · #65 11/05/13, 07:31 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by seedspreader

Best advice I can give succinctly:

1) Leave California in California.Somethings will be done stupidly and ignorantly in ID. That's ok... take a bit of time to see why people do stuff, sometimes you'll have a better way, sometimes you won't.
2) Develop a strong faith.
3) People don't care how much you know until they know how much you care. Get involved in the community. At your stage in life, you'll have to do age-appropriate functions and groups. Hunting clubs, gardening clubs, church attendance, Reading groups, etc. With us, we were easily immersed because our kids got involved in a bunch of activities.
4) Be a good neighbor... when you have a bad neighbor... still be a good neighbor. You'll either wear them down, or they'll die off.
5) Be of one mind with your spouse and make sure you all are there for the same reasons, because you might get lonely. You better be good friends with him too.
6) Understand all of your "systems" in your house and don't be afraid to ask questions. If you're new to rural, get the septic system inspected before you purchase. Poop problems suck.
7) Well problems suck worse... buy a house with a submersible well that's got 6" casing and get the water flow and quality checked.
8) Dirt and gravel roads mean dusty cars and chipped paint. It's a fact of life, so get used to it and don't hold any possession too tightly.
9) Good bones on the house... make sure to buy something with a good roof, strong foundation and lots of insulation. If you have never heated with wood before and will be, your woodstove is more important than your electric cooking range. Spend more on it, it will pay you back in the long run.
10) Don't forget the rule of 3 (in the sense of survial)... moving from urban to rural, YOU are your life line and first line of defense. The rule of 3 - have 3 ways to get water, 3 ways to heat, 3 ways to cook, etc. Snow, ice and non-southern california things await you.

Maybe not too succinct...

Quote:

Originally Posted by LisaInN.Idaho

I would just be honest and be nice and don't act arrogant and you'll do fine.

Brilliant advice!!