Bit of a dilemma, need some advice

mateosbaby · #21 06/11/10, 04:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by edcopp

at least most of us who are older.

Let me define. You want to run before you have learned to walk. I know from experience.

Here is my suggestion. Rent a house with a yard. Get a house that is large enough for your family. Practice your gardening skills there. Let us know when you have gotten to the point where you no longer need a lawnmower. Make this activity a part of your homeschooling activities.

Be sure that your children learn about nutrition, and the cost and effort needed to grow food, and feed for their animals as well. Be sure that they learn how to keep books concerning this and other activities. They might benefit from learning to balance a checkbook as well.

Have them learn how to determine which animals are producing some sort of profit, and which are not.

Now for the grandparents. Get out of there as quickly and gracefully as possible. They have been good enough for too long now, and even if they do not admit it they are most likely tiring of the situation.

As for mom and dad. Learn that CASH IS KING. There is no other way to say this. Money that needs to be accumulated needs to be in a usable form. This is called cash. Start cutting costs, and accumulating cash.

Do not consider your rent as lost cash. This is an expense that is necessary and will always be necessary in some form or other. Right now your grandparents are providing for this expense. They may not always be available, so your family needs to learn to provide this (before you try to run).

There is no sense in attempting to buy land on time payments right now. Did you notice that this is the first time that land has been mentioned. In many parts of the country the price of land is going down. I would wait and see what happens next. Remember that cash is king.

So when you learn some new habits and save some cash you will be better prepared to look for land.

Let us know when you are able to sit at the kitchen table some Saturday evening and count out $10,000 in cash. You will then be in a position to look at things a lot differently.

Welcome to the forum

LOL If I run to the bank tomorrow morning, I can count out MORE than $10,000 right now. :P

We had a garden at our other house, but the space was small. My grandparents, mom, and aunt all have gardens, so I can get my practice whenever I want.

BTW, we've rented a house in the past, and they didn't want us messing with their yard. I don't think many people would want us messing up their yard with a garden that most likely would get torn out after we move out, especially if we end up making it nearly the entire yard...

My oldest child is 7. I don't think she's quite ready for most of what you mentioned

, but this is something that is definitely going to be rolled into all the kids' education when they are old enough.

mateosbaby · #22 06/11/10, 04:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by where I want to

The trouble with buying somethign with an iffy job, unless you have enough captial to pay it off, is that you may lose whatever you put into it if there is no job and you can't make payments.
If, on the other hand which I think is your case, you have the money from the sale of the old house to buy a new one, then I would spend time looking for that land with potential -somewhere you can put your sweat equity into.
Re: renting or staying with grandparents- if your grandparents are kind enough to support you all, then that's a no-brainer. It's simply your choice as to stay or go. I'll be that it's as old for them as for you. So you could try to negotiate some compromise with them with whatever causes problems and maybe (here's a thought) pay them rent.

I should clarify about the job. It is perfectly stable, it's a moral issue here that's causing us to realize it's very temporary. We would LOVE to be able to start our own business full-time, but we're not entirely sure it's the right time for it yet.

And we'd LOVE to pay them rent and pay our share of the bills, but they won't let us. :P

beaglebiz · #23 06/11/10, 05:16 PM

Our kids have had their own "farm chores" since they were able to walk. feeding chickens, rolling the eggs in the bator, picking berries, raking hay etc etc.
My youngest mucked out the turkey and chicken coops this weekend. He is ten, and did a fine job. He knows how to raise food (poultry and vegetables), and can pluck a chicken.

edcopp · #24 06/11/10, 05:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mateosbaby

LOL If I run to the bank tomorrow morning, I can count out MORE than $10,000 right now. :P

We had a garden at our other house, but the space was small. My grandparents, mom, and aunt all have gardens, so I can get my practice whenever I want.

BTW, we've rented a house in the past, and they didn't want us messing with their yard. I don't think many people would want us messing up their yard with a garden that most likely would get torn out after we move out, especially if we end up making it nearly the entire yard...

My oldest child is 7. I don't think she's quite ready for most of what you mentioned

, but this is something that is definitely going to be rolled into all the kids' education when they are old enough.

I was talking about the next (new) $10,000.

If 7 years old is too soon for a little responsibility like making notes and keeping a few records, what would be a good time to start; 25 or so?

rambler · #25 06/11/10, 11:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mateosbaby

We have been saving up to buy a house, so we have all our ducks in a row. Our original plan was to buy a house close to his job, and then in a few years, after the debt is paid off and we've saved again, to buy the land, then to get out of Dodge, so to speak, and go full-time on our land, building something small and adding on as we go. The land does NOT have to be anywhere near the Twin Cities, but we do want somewhere in MN or western WI. 1 income is not temporary, this is permanent and always has been, and our lender knows this. We have awesome credit, so the lowest interest rates possible.

By most American's standards, we have barely any debt: my 2 student loans (one is getting very close to getting paid off), and 1 car loan, and my dh's student loan which his parents are paying for him.

Sounds like you are better off on things & ducks in a row than many who wish to jump off on their own. I hope you enjoy the various answers here, we all have our slant to how we want to live, and bring that to the table. Doesn't really mean much to how you want to do things, and that's cool. Just different opnions & thoughts is all.

I'm down by New Ulm, rural area. I run a small farm, never really had a paying job. Finances are fun when you are self employed, combine breaks & I get to drop $4000 in an afternoon plus 2 days of time before I'm back to earning money. Stuff like that. Self employed is wonderful wouldn't want it otherwise, but the govt is dead stacked against you with taxes, and there are days when the wheels fall off and boy it is hard to get up & face the next day.

I got some help from the folks as many farmers do, I understand living with family gets a little rough - you might want to get out of there sooner rather than later, it does put a strain on everyone over time. Seriously. You want to be careful - you are getting perhaps $2000 a month in benifits from family it sounds like - that will really be a shock when it isn't there any more. Be prepared for the belt tightening! No matter how you say yea I know.... You will be hit by a bucket of water when that goes away. Try to be prepared - you won't be I garentee, but try...

Hopefully someday both those expensive educations can be put to use. Really could use that now, but with the kids, and if you home-school, it's tough I know. My neighbors home-school their 5 kids, kinda neat. Actually mom did workbooks & such with me, kindergarden was not manditory in my day & so she taught me instead of going - wow was I ahead of the rest in 1st grade.... I've never understood spelling tho, for those who have tried to read my messages for a long time.

Sounds like you have some roots in the area you are looking at, so no reason to suggest looking any other area. Roots are good to have.

Still a row to hoe & things to get in order, but you are headed down the path.

Welcome to the forum, good folks here with some good (and some off the wall....) ideas. All opinions, don't take anything too seriously, don't ignore everything either.

--->Paul

HilltopDaisy · #26 06/12/10, 01:17 AM

My only question is, what were the expectations of Grandma and Grandpa? They let 6 people move in with them?

I have been the caretaker for a lovely elderly couple. Family treats them like CRAP. Family moves in, family moves out; family takes advantage, on every level (kids are out of control, grandparants are not used to children who do not listen; kids are jumping on/off furniture, family does not pay for food. Grandpa scolds a kid, and all of the sudden he's MEAN). Ya know what? Grandpa is NOT MEAN; he's trying to teach this generation some manners. That's not cool nowadays.

Obviously, we don't know the circumstances of how you ended up living in your Grandparents' home. Either they offered, or you requested that you be allowed to move in with them.

My personal experience has been that elderly GP's are often willing to let younger family move in, in exchange for help careing for GM, the home, the garden, etc,. and the younger folks are not willing/able to keep up their end of the bargain.

Not that this applies to you. Just saying........

ChristieAcres · #27 06/12/10, 02:17 AM

mateosbaby, glad to hear your answers, as NONE were surprising to me. I've been a Loan Officer for 5 years, was good at it, worked honestly, discount rates, but hung it up due to red tape, back in Dec, 2009. I have also been a RE Agent for 5 years, still am. Now, just what you shared in the OP told me enough to consider options (no one presents a Short Sale Offer without pre-approval- and now that is more difficult to attain). It made sense, also, that you had a down payment (you sold your house, but didn't tell us it was a stress sale, but moving near family). I posted about how things were in my "neck of the woods" which is rural but far from cheap. Our options here aren't necessarily your options there, except your financing.

My thoughts are the same. You can either get a Loan via a Bank, get Seller Financing (short or long term), or do a Lease Purchase. Any of those should be done via Title, Escrow, Deed, Recorded. The last one, offers an out, should you change your mind. That is a Lease Purchase Option. Also, done via Contract. The biggest mistake I have been reading some HTers have made was to do unrecorded contracts (I'd never do one). It may work out for some, but is quite a gamble, and the risk is too great. You either used an Atty or went through an Agent to make that Short Sale Offer, right? Same thoughts there. If it doesn't get accepted, take some time to brainstorm, get your criteria confirmed (what are your plans and how much/what type of property, where, will work for them), and your Agent can save you a lot of time. I would NOT waste my hard earned money renting for an entire year when I could buy. Others may not see it that way, but I do.

If you already garden, which wouldn't surprise me if you did

, I am only using this as an example:

A beginning gardener asks me for advice about how to grow a first year garden. If that gardener is local, I am a good person to ask, as I successfully grow vegetables here and gardening is my thing. If that gardener is out of state, it could be a completely different climate. I wouldn't recommend raised garden beds in a desert!

So, my thought here? Speak with someone you trust, who is successful at what you want to do, and you will get the best advice. This is regarding all your homesteading endeavors. I never hesitate to give credit to those who are skilled at what I am just learning. It pays off big time! Sure you will get advice here on HT. There are just some things it is best to address with a "local."

When we purchased our property, I walked the entire 6.68 acres, DH didn't?! This is because I had a vision which this property had be realized on. I did some research on this neighborhood. We are in a very good place with wonderful people, who won't hesitate to lend you a hand. We are the same way. I had to be sure this was it, as we plan to spend our entire lives here. DH was on board with that vision, but we think differently. I am far more proactive. DH wanted a well built shop (this one is above code) and I wanted a little farmhouse. I had to give up my little farmhouse, for the time being, for this 1,500 sq ft remodeled double-wide mobile home (7 yr old comp roof, double-paned vinyl windows/sliders, sheetrocked interior, etc...). It is a lot more space than I wanted/needed really. My office bldg was the clincher and that made it a much easier decision. We got more property than we hoped for less than we expected to pay. Just clearing 1/2 an acre put $12,000 in our pockets (2nd growth, DH logged it, hired a driver... We haven't touched our 5 acre forest). In time, we will clear 1 more acre, but we want to leave the rest in forest (4 acres total). Someday, we will get a remodel permit, and I will get my little farmhouse

Moving is not an option I would easily consider as I have set down my roots here. We have worked very hard and accomplished a lot in 3 years!

I hope you and your family find just what you want, with great neighbors, in a good area, and get to stay there to raise your children.

motdaugrnds · #28 06/12/10, 08:14 AM

You are getting some great information here; and though $10,000 does not sound like much, it is a nice start. (We actually bought our place for a total of $12.500, put in the septic tank ourselves & got a trailer for $5,000 within a year. So, it can be done!)

Do not give up; just place one foot in front of the other and keep going. You are fortunate to have family to help and ways of learning without doing it all wrong first. (We actually learned by doing, which means we made many mistakes; yet we got it done.)

I know saving money is hard as is getting out of debt; but these folks are right in that there is more to being self-sufficient & homesteading than one might think, i.e. costs one does not have when renting or living with family. (It also might be wise to make some sacrifice with regard to your pets; and yes, I know they are like family. I am thinking the family members might be more relaxed about your family being there if you did not have so many pets.)

You seem to have a good plan and it is obvious you want to stay in that area. Just practice some patience and do not jump into anything you are not sure you are ready for as there are "always" unforseen events that turn up and cost extra.

wwubben · #29 06/12/10, 08:31 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by pancho

Rent and save up. You need to get rid of all debt before even thinking about buying.
It isn't more expensive to rent than to pay on a house. Renters do not pay taxes, insurance, and upkeep on a rent house. Really they do by paying rent but don't forget to add all of these and other things to the price of owning a house.
People get in too much of a hurry to buy. Sometimes they have not added up everything it costs to buy and keep up a house. Just the housepayment isn't everything.

I agree.You are not in a favorable position to buy property if you have debt before you begin.Pay debt and get some savings.

Cascade Failure · #30 06/12/10, 08:49 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mustangsally17

If the employment situation is rockey you might want to stick it out at the grandparents until you are more stable. The initial expense of even moving into a rental is costly these days and all that money would be lost if the job goes down the drain.

This is the answer I was leaning towards, especially if the situation is rent free or well below market value.

You say the situation is getting old quick. OK, I understand that but, how does it compare to your long term goals?

agmantoo · #31 06/12/10, 09:58 AM

Find an owner financed property and give them a down payment and arrange through an attorney the loan agreement. Move in and start making the payments. All you have at risk is the down payment and all the seller has at risk is that you tear up more than the down payment can cover. The interest you pay the seller is tax deductible where the rent isn't. You will have property tax and be building equity. Renting will only give you a roof over your heads as long as you can pay the rent.