Couple of random things:
- for the bedwetter - what about getting the pads the hospital people call 'chucks'? They are flannel on the top side and waterproof on the back. Bed will feel wet to the bedwetter, but probably the entire bed won't be soaked and you can just wash the pad, not all the sheets. I used them when potty training my kid (had 'em already for other medical issues from other family members). Much less laundry that way.
- when you heat water for tea or whatever, boil the water then put it in a thermos for use over the course of the day. I also think (but I'm not positive) that microwaving a cup of water is less energy than boiling it on the burner - but that depends how you feel about microwaves, too
- have you looked at a solar oven? where you live, even preheating water for tea would be handy in one of those (lots of sunshine!) or you could cook in it
- someone mentioned using a chest freezer as fridge: check the archives in alternative energy forum, there are threads on that. I actually had that for several years, and now I have an *upright* freezer with the same thermostat thingie making it into a fridge. waaay less power than a regular fridge, more convenient than the chest freezer, good compromise for us
- heavy drapes to cut the light will ease your cooling problems in summer - we found cotton duck drapes dyed in dark colours at Ikea, they are very long (so like, floor to ceiling kind of length) and make excellent window insulators, blocking that hot sunshine in summer and the cold in winter
- bubble wrap on the windows in winter is AWESOME for insulation. I have almost zero experience with excessive heat, so can't help you there (northern Alberta doesn't really GET that hot, not for long anyway!) but I'll toss it out there
- try a seasonal diet... stuff that needs long cooking times is for cold days, stuff you can eat raw or with minimal heat is for hot days. I prefer salad on the (few) hot days we get here ... and soup when it's cold and rainy.
Solar Gary's website has some great info too - things like living screens to provide shade for cooling and so on.
Oh, have you looked into a solar battery charger for things like flashlights and so on? Every little bit helps.
Oh and for laundry - we don't have a dryer. In winter/rainy weather we hang it inside on a drying rack, and sheets and towels are hung on hangers that are suspended in a doorway (we just hook them over the door trim). Works awesome, but we have a very dry climate. If you can eliminate the dryer entirely I am sure it would help ... if stuff will dry before mildewing in your climate, anyway.