When is it time to give up on your dreams?

Dreams are supposed to inspire you and give you a hopeful goal.

I find it is time to let them go when they detract from everday life. You know, to the point that you disconnect from an unhappy reality by daydreaming of your happy place. If it comes to that what does it say about your opinion of your life as it is, right here and right now? If you never attained this dream would it have made your life less complete? What a shame if it did.

Sometimes happiness really is a state of mind not a state of being. Sometimes those restless yearnings don't fade even in the greener pastures. Be careful for if today is unhappy how will you find a happy tomorrow?

All we have is a series of now moments that unfold into the next moment. I have never personally seen a tomorrow, just a series of todays..........Like a resolution to do something tomorrow, unless you choose it now the tomorrow moment will never come.

If you always seek out the there....there down the road, instead of here you will just find another there to seek when you get to the first there.

In my experience the new job, new house, new everything that I waited for to find happiness never changed a thing. Putting conditions on happiness keep it from happening immediately.

I lived in Vermont for many years and then left. When I returned, once affordable properties were now outrageously expensive. Vermont is a beautiful state, but between the high real estate prices and the extremely high property taxes, I came to the conclusion that I could not afford to live there.

To give an example of even the high costs of rental housing back in 1985, a three bedroom house was going for $750 per month, and the going wages at the ski resorts and lodges in the area were paying five bucks an hour. Today, those same ski areas are paying around eight dollars an hour and a three bedroom house is probably anywhere from 1500-2000 dollars per month. Unless you are a professional making big bucks, Vermont is very expensive.

Have you thought about upstate NY? You can find property in NY state for fairly low prices in rural areas, but again, you have the problem of high property taxes.

When to give up? Only when you have another dream to take its place. A life without dreams is a poor excuse for living. As the old I -Chief On "OUTLAW JOSEY WALES" said,"We Must Endeavor to Persevere"

All my life I've dreamed of making my home in the mountains, permanently. It's never happened. I've been blessed enough to live in them sporadically, but never permanently. I dream of pine covered hills, a rambling creek, and a cabin in valley looking up into the mountains.

My first husband was military and dragged me all over. I fell in love with Germany and never, ever wanted to leave.

My husband now is a contract engineer, and again, staying in one place is tough.

One thing has remained true though. As much as I dream about those faraway places, the pine covered hills, the cool mountain air... I'm always grateful to get back to Missouri.

And now that my contracting hubby finally landed such a long term contract that we bought a house in Arkansas, well now I spend my days dreaming about our land back in Missouri.

In Missouri, everyone is friendly. I have been EVERYWHERE, and no place has people that friendly. In Missouri, you own all the rights with your land... water, mineral, gas... harder and harder to come by.

In Missouri, taxes are cheap, natural resources are abundant, food is inexpensive, U-pick farms, Farmer's markets, and Amish produce are everywhere.

In Missouri, don't you already own a beautiful piece of land out in Norwood? Easy access to Lebanon and Springfield for work, out in the country where it's peaceful, and last but not least, within driving distance of a cup of coffee with many of your fellow homesteaders right here on this board.

I think you already have the dream Don. I think it's time to realize the grass is far, far greener in Missouri.

P.S. Springfield made me miserable too. Move onto your land and commute.

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http://tinksquared.com

The time to stop dreaming is when you are dead. There is nothing wrong with altering your dreams with the use of otherwise dull reality you see from outside the box, just dont give up your dreams until your dead. Life without dreams is life as a zombie.

It took me 27 years to achieve my dream that is now Singletree Knoll, but only 18 years to achieve my childhood dream of going into outer space...sorta ( you can read about it on the "dreams fufilled" thread I posted on Singletree the other day ).

Bottom line is Life is nothing but a series of dreams and many will be fufilled without you noticing as Life occupies your attention and you keep chasing dreams in each phase of life.

If dreams were easily fufilled within set time frames, they would be no more than dreary reality instead of the one day of brass ring grabbing overwhelming or amusing achievement they are ment to be before they take their place in the dreary reality section of Life.

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"I didn't have time to slay the dragon. It's on my To Do list!"

Something we are learning about dreams is that they aren't about attaining what we think is the ideal. Dreams are about getting to where you think you may land, being open to unexpected outcomes, adjusting here and there, and enjoying the adventure while you're on the way.

Nick and I thought for sure we'd end up living on a bluff in WI. That fell through, and it was a hard loss at the time. In the meantime, we've done what we can to homestead here in the 'burbs, kept our eyes, ears, and hearts open to possibilities, and realized that our dreams weren't big enough.

Something we have learned is to let go of what we thought was security, and be aware of what is truly important to us. We learned that you have to say, "No" to some things, in order to say "Yes!" to others.

Being broke isn't the worst thing in the world. Giving up on your dreams is.

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Je ne suis pas Alice

http://homesteadingfamilies.proboards.com/

Never give up on your dreams! Just realize that they make take a different direction than you originally planned. I never wanted to live in PA. Lived here for a couple of years quite awhile ago and decided that even though it's beautiful, it was too hot. (I'm from NH) I decided after my divorce, that I was going to finally go to Alaska, like I'd always wanted to do, and homestead by myself. Well...a marriage and 5 "new" kids later (in addition to my own 2 kids) I'm right back where I started in PA. I still think it's too hot and also overcrowded w/tourists in some areas, but I wouldn't trade this new dream for anything in the world. Remember...life is what happens while we're making other plans! Don't give up!

I moved from the NH/VT border a year ago and I can tell you that you are absolutely correct with your price estimates. I had small 2 bedroom house (about 1100 square ft) and it cost $1200 per month w/o anything included and the price of oil and propane are outrageous as is the cost of wood...about $250-$300 per cord. No doubt VT is gorgeous, but just not worth what you pay.

Hey PC,

Have you wrote down what your dreams are and how Vermont fulfills those? Then, have you looked at other areas that may meet those dreams/requirements? I mean is it snow, mountains and political leanings that you are looking for? Is it good farmland? Is it... "xxxx"?

I know that I've had idealized dreams of places I would like to live, but usually the reality of it never lived up to the dream. That was because my dream was just that, it wasn't a goal.

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It is important to know the difference between a dream and a fantasy. A fantasy is something that lives in our heads. We think we really want it, but sometimes when we get it we find we do not want it any more. Only you can determine that for yourself.

I think if you anyone who has achieved a dream, most will tell you they didn't get to the destination quite the way they expected. In my case, we took alot of
detours that, at the time, seemed like settling for "less". Or going in the entirely wrong direction.

But in fact they were little steps that took us closer and closer...

Maybe you can't get a job in Vermont. But maybe you can get a HIGHpaying job in NYC that would buy that pricey Vermont land in a year or two.. Or maybe you have to PASS Vermont and go to Maine. The ticket to Vermont may be waiting for you there.. or anywhere. You never know.

Remember that saying when a door shuts, a window opens?
If you are not making progress in life's journey, you may be staring at the closed door - while the open windows are surrounding you.

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Hut on the Hill Farm
http://www.hutonthehill.org

I haven't read any of the other responses.
My response is: NEVER.
The direction might change a bit, or get "modified" along the way, but as long as you are happy, and get what you are looking for, that is good.

Dreams take work, and lots of it. Its a learning process also, and when the "right" place comes along that was meant for you, you'll know--things will start to happen and the ball will get rolling.

The only time you should ever give up on your dream, is when the pursuit of that dream is causing others to suffer. My brother & I always shared the dream of owning a logging outfit. In pursuing that dream we both became consumed, working long hours everyday, 7 days a week. We put that dream first, ahead of everything else. Now I was single at the time, but he had a wife & 2 little girls at home. 1 day his wife told him she was leaving him & took the girls to live with her mother. We were so focused on that dream we never realized that it was causing his family to suffer emotionally & financially. We abandoned that dream & have never regretted it. (They've been back together 17 years, the girls are grown & they have a strong, happy marrarge).

here is a little music video on youtube that expresses how i feel...

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this message has probably been edited to correct typos, spelling errors and to improve grammar...

"All that is gold does not glitter..."

I don't have time to read all the posts........but never...ever give up on your dreams. that is the meaning of living. ((hugs))

I'll take credit for having said that.. my opinion remains the same on that point however, I didn't bring up that dead horse so why have you?/


A little background on why we chose vermont.

1) Weather... It is simply to hot here in MO.. Not to give TMI but I'm tired of having the runs 9 months of the year. I know its the heating causing it because I do not have that issue in (what passes for) winter here.

2) The people.. Again not to go into what Adron has brought up. But I find people here in town to be deceitful and rude. I find the people in the country to be friendly, at least till you turn your back on them.. Then they stab you in the back.

3) Well I won't go there.

Every since HS I've dreamed of VT. We went there for the first time 6 years ago, imagine how surprised I was to find it as I imagined. Realizing that perhaps it was because we were in a tourist area, we started spending extended vacations in more (real, rural) areas. Walking around places we though we'd like to purchase and talking with people.. You know what.. They were very kind... It just feels like home.

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"Let the beauty we love, be what we do. There are hundreds of ways to kneel and kiss the ground." Rumi

When someone else ruins them completely for you. They are no longer a dream, but a nightmare.

Well that pretty much sums it up. It feels like home to you, and the people were comfortable to be around. I'd say Vermont it is, and you should hang onto that dream for all it's worth.

There's a place on earth for everyone. We have all been someplace that left us in awe as soon as we set foot there, and we've all been places that something unidentifiable told us, "this can never be home". Sounds like you've found your spot.

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http://tinksquared.com

PC if your lookin for a place in vermont you can stay at my farm in NY. its empty now . its about a hour from vermont . see if you like the winters there . thaere about the same as vermont . plus you can drive over VT find a job or ? the people around my place in NY are real friendly to. the guy next door tells me if you need my truck the keys are always in the ignition . just put it back when your done. my place in CT the people around here will not even say hi or wave . it may help get you a little closer to your dream

Couldn't have said it better myself. Dreams are what keep me motivated!

Maggie