Beyond heart broke and ready to give up.

Any relationship can be a huge connection. And when we have this connection and it is severed we freak! I have anyways

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Teach only Love...for that is what You are

Yes, the first years are the worst. I managed to kill a buckling right off. Sigh. Still not sure what got him, but it prompted a LOT of reading. He is one of the reasons I post so many links when answering questions.

I've lost another buck to UC, even thought I *thought* I was feeding them right with medicated feed. Found out that wasn't right, either.

Lost a favorite doe to a spider bite on her teat, but kept her going long enough for her to kid.

It's hard. REALLY hard. These wonderful goats are so personable that they become our critter families, and losing them feels like letting down our children.

I can't tell you if it's right to hang in there or throw in the towel. But, I can tell you that the goats are my sanity while other things in my life get out of control.

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Alice
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"No great thing is created suddenly." ~Epictitus

Donna,

You absolutely did not let us down!!

G-mo was spoiled and loved! He had a wonderful life with you!

The drought has hurt all of our animals' health. You did all that you could! I would trust any of my goat children with you! (((Hugs)))) my goat friend! I know how much it hurts. I miss all of my goats who have crossed the rainbow bridge.

Even though G-mo smelled and peed on his face, you loved him and spoiled him. He had the best home any buck could wish for! You are an incredible goat momma! Do not doubt me. Any buck is blessed to find a home with you and Eric!

Donna, do not give up! The pain will numb. It never goes away, but it dulls. You are a great goat-person. Pm me or call. (((Hugs)))

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That's sad news. But don't give up.

Oh I'm so sorry Don't give up!! So many wonderful goatie days ahead, really!

You all are such great people. It's been a very hard few months but the good does weigh out the bad. I am so happy to have him even if it was shorter then I wanted. I have beautiful babies out of this wonderful lovely buck. He was and will be always my baby boy. We had our breeder out for dinner and we sat and talked and i teared up and even though it would be easier to give up I would be miserable if I did. So as of now I will hang in there and mourn my babies and love thoses that are here. Thank you all again.

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(((hugs))) It will get better, I promise.

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I am so sorry for your Loss Donna but glad to hear your hanging in there.

I'm so sorry. I went through that with my first ever goats. I lost my WHOLE herd of Nubians when I was first starting to one thing or another. My sheep- they thrived. The goats, I couldn't seem to do anything right in my own opinion. My goats were dying, and I loved them, and it hurt so much- I still have a sad place in my heart for them, 13 years later. I had friends who just kept on encouraging me. The learning curve has been long and difficult, but we are finally in a place where we feel more confident, and our goats are living normal lives now. I've even gotten to the point where we can take in a goat for a time and bring it back to condition for its owners. Every loss was horrible, painful, and negatively powerful in our lives, but it also always made us step back and reconsider what we were doing. Sometimes we'd done nothing wrong. Sometimes we had. Sometimes we'd just bought stock with hidden illnesses. I didn't have reliable internet in those early days, so researching wasn't instant like it is today.
I doubt you are a bad goat keeper. You are just on the beginning of the upcurve on the learning curve. There are soooo many variables, and it takes so long to learn what each goat's signals are if it is feeling off.

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*Just simply gives an encouraging virtual hug* What a painful year you've had. I'm so very sorry- but as others have said, you will learn from these losses and already have, so things are bound to get easier. Doesn't make these early losses less painful, but maybe a bit of hope.

So sorry to hear about your loss. I too have had the "ready to give up" thoughts this year.
Your kids need you too much. I'm glad you are feeling "a little less bad" about it all. It just does not seem right sometimes.

SPIKE

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All things should be done with COMMON SENSE!
All things should be done with RESPECT!
All things have a PROPER time and place!
And most things should be done in MODERATION!