How to get DS to eat goat?

I see the point of saying "okay, make a sandwich" but my son is 7. He is not allowed to make a sandwich himself, so I'd have to do it for him or at least do most of it. And I don't think it's right to teach him that he can have a sandwich (not that nutritious) if he doesn't want what we are having. He is the type that would take that and run with it if we let him get started. It's not like he doesn't like the veggie/side, we are talking about the main course here. If he was older, I might go that route.

My 4 year old did not taunt him about it, sorry that wasn't clear. Honestly, he was not thinking that it would upset his brother. He was just excited in a "hey, we made it ourselves, neat!" kind of way. We have had a talk about how it bothers his brother and now he doesn't say that any more. I am proud of him that at 4, he is able to understand that it bothers his brother to say that and sensitive enough to stop saying it, down to remembering not to say it when we have goat again.

I agree about not naming food animals, that is the rule here too! It wasn't intentional, lol. This was the alpine that was supposed to be a milk goat and turned out to be CAE positive, so we were not intending to eat her when we got her. Otherwise, she would not have had a name. The 3 month old wether out with his mom and sister does not have a name, we knew that any bucklings would go to freezer camp and intentionally didn't name them. But I don't know if it would have made any difference if she hadn't had a name, he told me he wouldn't eat a rabbit from the grocery store either. And that never had a name that we know of, nor did he see it alive.

We have tried the no answer/non commital answer route and that worked a few times. He'll say, "what are we having for dinner" and I'll say "meat" or "roast" or whatever. But he has now decided he will not eat ANY meat unless he knows what animal it came from. So if I stick to it and refuse to tell him what animal we are eating, he simply won't eat any meat at all. I wish I could magically make him understand that it is okay, that we raise our animals with love and excellent care and they are happy and healthy until the end. That it is a better way to get meat than from factory farms with animals packed in and never seeing the sunlight or hearing a kind word (not that I am saying they are all that way, but we KNOW that ours had a good life). That we can both love our animals and think they are cute and cuddly, but still understand that they are meat once they are gone. But I don't think he is going to budge on this anytime soon. I'm not sure why it's okay with him for us to eat the goats (so he understands that they are meat now), but not for him himself. I asked him and he can't explain it, being 7 it may just not be something he can put into words yet.

I guess I will just stick with the "no dessert" rule until he decides what he'd rather do; eat goat or skip dessert. I am not starving him or denying him protein, it's not like we have goat every night or even every other night. But I am thinking maybe we will have really special desserts on nights that we are having goat for a while. If he was totally against anyone eating goat and it really bothered him that the meat is goat at all, I would be more willing to say okay, you don't have to eat it at all and you can have something else. But when we sat down and had a talk, he was perfectly okay with the goat being meat and us eating her. He just didn't want to eat her himself. So I don't think I am going to emotionally scar him. He also isn't bothered by the taste, he likes it when he doesn't know what it is. So I am not forcing him to eat something that tastes revolting to him. Actually, I am not forcing him to eat anything, I just really think he needs to learn to be more open about eating foods that are not the "norm" in his mind and I am trying to encourage him to do that. I am tempted to have someone else, not part of the family, talk to him about it and see if it might be easier for him to understand this if we are not the ones doing the explaining. Since, at 7, he is convinced he knows everything and we are never right, lol.

When I was growing up, we produced a lot of our own food, and it was a team effort. If you were old enough to walk, then you were old enough to pick beans. Everyone got a five gallon bucket and was assigned a row. When your bucket was full, you were done, whether you liked to eat what you were picking that day or not. Then you got to shell it that night. I'd be crying and bargaining and begging and protesting because I didn't like peas, but fair was fair and everyone pitched in. When it came to dinner, you just said a little prayer that mom cooked something you liked. If not, oh well, eat an extra piece of cornbread. When it came to meat, I personally could never eat any of our chickens. My dad taught me how to kill and clean them, and I'd help, but when dinnertime rolled around, I opted out. My choice. No one offered to fix anything different. I think a little tough love is good for a healthy growing kid. I didn't expect anything handed to me on a silver platter. My parents were never hateful about it, it just "is what it is". This is what's for dinner, your mom worked hard preparing it, we all worked hard producing it, the chicken gave its life, there is no reason NOT to find something on this table to eat. Just my two cents....

I honestly don't think its a generational gap issue. I think its all in how we are raised. I am 28 and came from a very strict home where we ate what was put in front of us no matter if we liked it or not. We would be made to sit at the table until our plate was finished, no option. I do not have kids, but it absolutely drives me crazy when I see my siblings allow their children to get down from the table without eating a reasonable amount of their food and then get a 'snack' 30 minutes later. I didn't like being forced to eat peas (but my father would not eat green beans). My tastes have changed over time and being forced to eat stuff didn't have any effect on that. Tastes just naturally change. If a child tries a food and does not like it, that's okay, but you bet your last dollar they are going to try it. I am not that pick of an eater, with the exception of tomatoes, peas, cauliflower, and cukes.

I personally would attempt to take the oblivious approach with 'meat' or 'steak' or whatever, do that with all meat protein that you serve, not just goat. Some may see it as a lie-by-omittion, but its definitely better than saying its beef or venison. Just my opinion, but then again, I do not have kids.

I do agree with both things you said, and I didn't mean shelter him, I just meant he may not completely understand what is being explained. I know with my children, a lot of times I could explain things, they could parrot them back, but that didn't mean they actually understood it.

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Sounds like he doesn't want to eat the one with the name? I'd ask him if it were a different goat if it would matter. He may not want to admit being a softy to his parents, but it sure sounds like he had no problem before the mental image brought up by his brother's innocent comment. If he says another goat would be no problem, I'd go through the extra effort of fixing the boy a sandwich on goat night until she's all gone. JMO, but not much effort for me and I think it would mean a lot to him

Maybe this would be a good time to teach him *how* to make a sandwich by himself. It may not be as pretty as one you'd make, but he's got to learn some time! I personally don't think there's anything wrong with him not wanting to eat goat. Maybe he just doesn't feel like goats are an animal he's comfortable eating. You want your kids to be able to make decisions about what they think is right and wrong, and he just doesn't agree with this one. It's not a big deal. We've had lots of food battles with DSS and DSD, and they'll not die if they miss a meal or even one part of a meal.

As adults, we have the luxury of not preparing foods that we don't like. Kids don't have that option. I don't cater to my steps and make them each a different thing, but for example, I know my DSS hates beans (baked beans) so we try to have thigns like baked beans and chili on nights when they're at their mom's, or if they are here he just has to eat his other items like the meat and veggie, and one bite of beans. His sister used to hate beans too, but now she loves them.

There are so many confusing "rules" of getting kids to eat, it's definitely hard to make the "right" choice. I really don't agree at all with making kids clear their plates of everything. THat's a really good way to cause an eating disorder if they can't listen to their body tell them when it's done. And using dessert as a "prize" (which is hard to avoid) is another good way to create an unhealthy relationship with food.

We have tried many different things, and what works well for us is to set the rule that they have to at least try the food before not eating it. If they want to eat dessert they have to eat a reasonable amount of dinner first. We don't have dessert every night.

Nope, he won't eat the ones that didn't have a name either. I wish that was it, I'd just not serve her meat to him. But it's any goat, name or not. Any rabbit too, even though we've never had rabbits. Good thought, though, thanks!

You just need to find a very mean goat, make him take care of it for a while before its butchered. that always cured me
Oh and rabbits that kick and scratch the heck out of you too...

LOL, lasergrl, I did ask him once if he would have eaten the doe we culled a few years ago. She stood up and knocked him to the ground a few times, was very pushy even with us adults. We weren't butchering at the time, so I sold her. She was very aggressive with the other goats too and just didn't fit in here at all. He did say he thought he might have been able to eat her, lol. Guess I need to find me some more mean goats and some mean bunnies too! (Okay not really going to do that, but the thought made me smile, am I a mean person?)

I think you are handling it well. If he wants to eat it fine, if he doesn't fine too. I would tell him it is goat when it is, remind him of the no dessert rule if he doesn't eat it and then ignore what he does. Don't give him any attention at all over his choice. When dessert comes around excuse him from the table. Tolerate no whining or tears, he made his choice and now he must deal with it.

So you are going to punish your son everytime you eat goat or rabbit because it goes against his personal feelings?

Let's say you as a child had to go and live with people who ate cat and dog, you did not believe it eating it at all, they tricked you into doing so and it made you feel sick. You refused to eat any meat after that because when you asked the adults they deceptively said " Meat" and you could no longer trust them. So you refused to eat meat and then watched the other kids at the house enjoying dessert while you cried and felt left out because you just could not eat Fluffy or Fido.

As a child I was not hungry most of the time. I weighed all of 30 lbs when I entered Kindergarten.Not picky just not hungry.
Family use to try to trick me, coerce me, and some lied to me. Funny how I still remember my Aunt when I was about 3-4 years old telling me if I ate the meatballs I would get a poodle. She knew I wanted a real dog badly and had been asking my parents for one. So even though I was not hungry at all I choked down some pasta and that meatball and she brought out a ragged stuffed poodle. I never trusted her again after that. Kids dislike lying and trickery as much as adults do. Some of us still remember the nonsense adults pulled on us, as seen in some of these posts.

Rather then force him to eat something against his beliefs and making him have memories for the rest of his life on how you guys forced, tricked, or lied to him and made him not ever want to eat A-B or C teach him to make a sandwich, at his age there is no cooking involved, no cutting and etc.

Who cares if the taste did not bother him, the idea did.
He is a person, sure a little one but he still has feelings and beliefs, respect them and do not force him to eat it.

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Very good discussion, from both sides, However.....
I am of the "pick your battles carefully" opinion. My own son has absolutley LOVED different things, then all of a sudden hates the very same thing. It's a phase. I personally do not go out and make him something else, just make sure he gets "something" for dinner. I remember very well the meal times with my parents. It was almost always AWFUL. We were forced to eat whatever it was, or sit there all night. I remember falling asleep at the table to a helping of Cold Slimy Boiled Spinach, with Vinegar on it. Or boiled potatoes with "broth" aka greasy water off the roast....
I remember Dad pushing my sister's face into a plate of spagetti because he didn't like the way she was eating it. I remember being knocked off my chair for not eating potatoes. Dad lives here with us now, and sometimes he tells me to "Make him do it" in reference to our son, but DH and I have a different way of doing things. I save my energy for the really important battles. Mostly by remembering the battles we had every day when I was a kid.
And I STILL won't eat that spinach!

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I like the approach of letting him eat the rest of the meal and skip the meat. No reason to force it. I don't have kids, so my 2 cents probably isn't worth much, but I think it is great that he is thinking about his food so much at such a young age! I would encourage him to think about the sources of his meat, even if it means he doesn't eat meat with every single meal (skipping meat for one meal, a few times a week should not hurt him. If anything, I think most Americans eat too much meat)

Right now he is a little kid, so the thought of eating Sally, the sweet little goat in the backyard, is probably really sad. 10-20 years from now, he will probably see the big picture a lot better than he does now, and hopefully will still be making responsible food choices.

If you don't have goat or rabbit for every meal and he eats the side dishes, just let him eat the sides. I'm seeing this as becoming a mountain from a molehill. I think he'll see the withholding dessert as a punishment which might make him feel like a martyr and just reinforce his determination.

Personally, I'd make it simple, "It's goat, fill up on vegetables instead" and have the usual dessert. Act like it's no problem to you as long as he eats enough vegetables to qualify as a meal. If the rest of the meal is healthy, why is skipping meat an issue? JMO

Absolutley! Most kids won't eat their vegetables!

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Thanks everyone! It's interesting how many different opinions there are on the same issue. Just so no one worries, I am NOT forcing him to eat goat. If he doesn't eat it, he can still get up from the table as long as he has had a reasonable amount of other food. But since the rule here is no dessert unless you've at least tried everything on your plate, he does not get dessert when he doesn't eat it. I am doing some thinking about if I want to change that on "goat nights" but I'm afraid it may open up a whole other problem, so I'm still thinking it over. You all have given me lots to think about and it really helps to see everyone's different points of view. I really appreciate that! Thanks again

And Cheribelle, I will say I am VERY lucky on the vegetable front. My kids are just like me in that respect, we all love our veggies! How many 4 and 7 year olds ask for seconds on things like asparagus and artichokes? YUM

Absolutely wonderful post, from start to finish

You know, I like meat. I like meat from ugly animals. I like meat from cute animals. But I don't think I could eat goat unless I was starving. Can't tell you why. Maybe it's because I started eating meats before I knew what kind of animals they were from. Maybe it's because I met goats as the individual personalities they are before I ever encountered them as meat. I don't know. And it really doesn't matter why.

Regardless, like your son, I can't eat goat. And like your son, I'm fine if others do, I just don't think I could without becoming nauseated. Psychological blocks are as real as any other. Making this into a control issue wouldn't be healthy...we're not talking about illegal drug use here Respect his feelings, teach him to make his own sandwich and call it a day. Respect your relationship with him and be honest about what you're serving. You'll both be better for it

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3 Nigerian Dwarf goats, 4 cats, 3 Pekin ducks and 7 chickens. One very patient husband~

I'm glad you're thinking about your rules. You are a good parent! life changes, kids change, sometimes rules change, sometimes they don't. But I think if your kids know that you are willing to re-think things in light of new input - even if you don't always change your mind - they will be a lot more willing to talk to you about their thoughts, beliefs, and feelings as they grow. And if you give them the reasons behind your thoughts, they will be more likely to internalize them or at least respect them than if it is just "because I said so."

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