Are you living in your dream or have you settled?

[Freya]

Is abundance or lack of money the reason you are where you are (I mean literal location)?

If money were no issue... would you change where and what you have? Would you stay where you are now? Add to it? Move across the country or world?

Have you settled or fully found your dream? Did the "settling" bring happiness or more pain in your heart and head?




I personally have "settled" in the short term in an area I never intended to be in for reasons that I did not see coming. An over abundance of money would magically fix this (gee it would for most everyone lol), but I am now stuck wondering if I need to redefine my original goals since I am now waaaay off course. And this is causing an internal dilemma of epic proportions.

[hhhandyman]

I would have to say we are living our dream; first and foremost by being together on our 20 acres here in the northwoods. Second, by sharing a common purpose in becoming more self-sufficient.

We are both "city kids", but each spent some time on farms during our childhoods. DW ended up here in the U.P. by accident; I ended up here by choice after retiring from the military.

Fffarmergirl and I didn't really start "prepping" until 2008, but by then had already built a small flock of laying hens and some Angora rabbits - just seemed a natural use of the space and resources we had available.

I can't imagine living anywhere else (vacationing, yes) and even if we were blessed with an abundance of money, I expect it would be used to further homestead development and expand the property.

Best of luck, Freya, on resolving your dilemma and finding peace and happiness.

[SFM in KY]

If there were absolutely no other considerations, I would probably be living in the mountains of northern NM. I really wanted to buy land there 30 years ago, to retire to, exactly (I think) what I was looking for. Four seasons, but shorter winters. Mountains, BIG mountains. Very few people. Looked quite a lot like the area where I grew up in Montana without the 8 months of winter.

My now-ex vetoed that idea thoroughly ... he just barely tolerated being 12 miles out of town where we were ... so didn't happen.

My next attempt to buy land where I really wanted to live the rest of my life, near the Pryor Mountains in MT, didn't work out either, for a number of reasons.

I do not expect to ever move again, but Kentucky was really not my first choice for 'the rest of my life' residence.

[Tricky Grama]

I've 'settled', not b/c of $$ really, b/c DH doesn't want to build & move to our acreage.
Have a nice home in the 'burbs, just not what I had hoped for to retire, not too happy w/"working neighborhood": hustle/bustle of commuters noise, too close to next door-could see into @ others' windows, etc.

[Laura Zone 10]

I am living the dream every day.
If I had it to do all over again.........I would have never worked a day outside the home.

I am abundantly blessed, clearly have way more than I know what to do with, and way more than I deserve. There are days when I pull in my driveway, and just sit in awe of what I have been given!! We have been here 8 years and I still have those moments where I go "I cannot believe this is our house /property".

[7thswan]

I'm perfectly happy right here. I'd like more land, but then that's just because I'm of the kind that one can Never have enough land.

[Callieslamb]

I really believe in growing where you are planted. I love where I am. If DH's job moves us, I will learn to love again. So in that respect, money does keep us where we are. I miss my kids - they all live in different states. Many of them are still bound by college. Perhaps when they are settled more permanently, we will decide we'd rather be somewhere else, but for now - we love where we are. It's a lot of work for aging bodies. I love the lifestyle. I love living in an agriculturally based area. I'd like more land too, but I am not sure what I would ever do with it. More land without more funding wouldn't be very useful.

[ErinP]

Our dream was to own a thousand or two acres of Nebraska Sandhills in the areas of one of the ranches we've worked on over the years.
The big hills, around Hyannis or Lakeside or so and run cows. However, as anyone knows, you can't get into full scale farming or ranching unless you have a nice backing from someone. So, we've compromised since the dream was pretty unrealistic.
I don't think we've "settled."

Or maybe we have. We've settled here in southern Nebraska/northern Kansas, where we'd been living (at first on the ranch we worked for) for 8 years.

We bought 40 acres and built a shop. Then started a house. Then moved in a trailer house. Then worked some more on the house. Last week we planted 150 NRD trees and walked around, holding hands, talking about the kids bringing home friends and significant others from college and how tall the trees would be by then.

And that hopefully the trailer would be long gone!

I, too, believe in blooming where you're planted. It's not the old dream, true. But the new dream isn't half bad, either.

[nduetime]

I am living my dream for the most part. If $$$ were no object, there are def. some things I would change/add to. Who wouldn't?

[fffarmergirl]

Originally Posted by Freya

I personally have "settled" in the short term in an area I never intended to be in for reasons that I did not see coming. An over abundance of money would magically fix this (gee it would for most everyone lol), but I am now stuck wondering if I need to redefine my original goals since I am now waaaay off course. And this is causing an internal dilemma of epic proportions.

LOL Have you ever seen the T-shirt that says "This Is Not the Life I Ordered"? Have you ever looked around at all the people who are just going through the motions - unhappy in what they're doing, jaded, cynical . . . . . "settled" but not really settled? If you pay attention you'll see that you are definitely no talone!

I used to think the world was a carnival and I could write my own tickets - choosing what ride I went on every day for my whole life. Then, one day, I got on a ride and was not allowed to get off! I found myself working as a nurse on a rehab unit. Up until that day, I got every job I ever applied for and changed jobs whenever I got bored. I've done a good job wherever I've worked, had a good attitude, received awards etc. I decided I didn't want to be a nurse anymore - it was demeaning and I deserved more - and I applied for another job,fully expecting to get it. It didn't happen, so I applied for another . . . . and another . . . . . and another. Nothing! Then I decided "Well - I guess I have to be a nurse. But I don't want to work rehab," and tried to go back to my old department. The management had changed & I couldn't go back. I prayed and prayed - every day - "please, God, rescue me from this stupid boring place!" God didn't give me my request! What the heck?! He's always answered all my prayers!

After years of weeping, wailing, and gnashing my teeth, what DH was trying to tell me finally got through to me . . . "Stop fighting it. It is obvious that this is where God wants you to be. God wants you to be a nurse - and it looks like He wants you on the rehab unit." So - I stopped my tantrum and looked around. I realized this is exactly the place I want to be! It's the most ethical unit I've ever worked on. I haven't been forced to do one single thing that goes against my conscience. I am allowed to touch lives every day and I have what very few nurses can ever say they have - time to spend with each and every patient & get to know them and touch their lives. I also have time to get to know all of my coworkers and we spend so much time together that we're beginning to feel like family. I never felt that way in the ER or the ICU.

All I had to do was stop kicking and screaming and look around - things were just fine right where I was! When I stopped fighting life, life stopped fighting me.

If you're in a place you don't want to be, and you can't get out, there's probably a reason you're there. Try taking a few deep breaths and looking around and pretending like you've already done everything in your power to get out of where you are. You've found out that you're imprisoned & escape is impossible. It's not such a terrible prison, is it? You're not being tortured and you have a warm bed and a roof over your head? You won't be giving up on ever getting out - but for a week or a month or some predetermined time, give up on figthing it. Pretend that you can't get out of it no matter how hard you try so you need to just make the best of it. See what happens - it couldn't hurt.

[jwal10]

Money is no problem, health is. I bought this place in 1976, just in case. I had bad health scares in '76,'80,'83 and '92 and this was the backup if I was never able to work again. But God was good to me and I have been able to avoid moving here. Our dream retirement place was the off grid cabin but due to circumstances we are here. It is the best for both of us right now. If our health situation improves we will move back there. This little place is heaven on earth. I can walk everywhere and still see the beautiful hills of the Coast Range. All my life, I have been able to look west and see the same peak....James

[HeelSpur]

I'm settled in but would be alot happier in the center of a 1000 acre lot. Right now I'm listening to a neighbors dog bark and squeel on its 2' chain and he'll do this for hours. People down the road have harleys and they like to let eveyone know that their riding by laying on the throttle. Harleys are nice, but I'm not in to noise polution. Actually in the center of 100,000 acres is probably more my style.

[lamoncha lover]

I am settling. I have been settling every since we sold our 120 acre farm in MN and bought a house with 4 acres in town in TN. The house is nicer then what we had, but after a 12 hour journey to get here I cried....i was in town.
We have bought land and put up a modest pole barn home. It is all a work in progress. Recent (past 2 years) financial problems have stopped any progress on the house. I am sooo disqusted. I am not getting any younger and I want to get back to the country before my body totally gives out.
It wouldn't take a lot of money to get the house liveable. But more then we have.
SSSOOOO much to do and no time or money.
If I won the lottery I would invest in my meager 30 acres and modest little home. And I would move yesterday! So yes...right now settling and feeling the biological clock ticking away.

[City Bound]

I am not happy living in the city and I intend to move once I have enough money. I hope to fall in love with a woman who has homesteading and self reliance inclinations and then build a dream together.

I dont know, I am getting old, I get discouraged sometimes, and i get tempted to just settle and go along with the heard. I try to remind myself that it is better to persue your dreams and fail trying then it is to fail by never trying at all.

maybe I look like a failure to worldy people, because I have no kids and barely enough money to survive, but one day my ship will come in or I will gladly be be an old gray man still sitting on the dock waiting for it to roll over the horizon.

[oregon woodsmok]

The trick is to be happy and make the best of whatever you've got.

Then keep an eye open for any opportunity to move closer to your dream. It's doesn't have to be a huge move, just closer.

[stamphappy]

Money were no object----back to Montana.

But we are happy here in Washington. The kids are 10 and 13 and don't remember other places we've lived (San Diego, DC) and they are very happy here. We are close enough we can visit Montana during the special times.

[Kelly]

Originally Posted by Laura Zone 5

I am living the dream every day.
If I had it to do all over again.........I would have never worked a day outside the home.

I am abundantly blessed, clearly have way more than I know what to do with, and way more than I deserve. There are days when I pull in my driveway, and just sit in awe of what I have been given!! We have been here 8 years and I still have those moments where I go "I cannot believe this is our house /property".

I can't tell you how many times I've driven up my driveway and think how blessed I am to be living where I am. I have a hard time getting in my car and going to work at a very stressful job. Thank goodness for my "little piece of heaven here" to return home to.

And it also helps having both my daughters/grandson just down the road

[Pam6]

I am still waiting...some days not so patiently...but I am waiting to be on my dream property. If it should never happen I will be okay....but I still dream....

[ronbre]

i have everything I NEED right here, sure there might be some wants I would add in had I unlimited cash but I would not move away from here.

i have a home with enough room for myself, more than enough nice furniture and toys, have a fairly private property with good screening, lots of nice trees and shrubs, a great pond (would like to have a flowing well to it though)..can't say even if someone offered me a couple Mil for it I would ever consider selling it..I just like it a lot here

[mabeane]

25 years in a place we love! As we are getting on in years we are finding 70 plus acres a bit much but have focussed our labors on the 13acres on this side of the road. I can see my sweet goats. The many raised beds are already producing. The sunrise and sunset is beautiful.