Why so rude?

[FrontPorch]

I've been on a lot of different forums over the years, but this one always ends up leaving me scratching my head. I'm not trying to start anything. I honest to goodness just want to try to understand the psychology behind the flame throwing that goes on around here. I'm not talking about the political debates, I'm talking about the innocent beginner trying to ask a question and being told the're an idiot (of course they're an idiot they're a BEGINNER). I mean, does it make you feel better and help you sleep at night after you've been so rude? Or are you just having a bad day and need to take it out on someone? I don't get it. Wouldn't it be easier to just ignore them if you didn't have anything nice to say? I mean why spend the time and effort typing? I know the internet is bringing the end to civil discourse but considering the logo up there in the upper left corner says "Neighborly help and friendly advice" why does every other post end in flames? I honestly and truly am just trying to understand it. Maybe there's a reason? Did I miss something?

[puddlejumper007]

you sure you are on the right forum?

[Lyra]

The forums have different attitudes and you can look around for the ones you like best. If you don't like this one, there are others. I avoid countryside families at all costs. To each their own.

[FrontPorch]

I was actually referring to all of the forums under the Homesteading Today umbrella in general.

[Oggie]

I think that it's probably because I'm not getting enough Ruff! Ruff! Ruffage!

[Windy in Kansas]

I certainly can't defend the forums nor individuals. One must understand that the homesteader/farmer type of person is fiercely independent compared to other folk. I don't know if that might make them more outspoken to the point of being considered rude or not. I tend to find all forums about the same, mostly nice folk with a few that ruffle feathers over something trivial or a major issue.

Sorry that your opinion is of rudeness here so I except that others probably feel the same way. I do hope you will attempt to look past that and continue to visit the forums and post.

[nehimama]

I just don't see it the way you do, OP. I don't encounter any rudeness in any of these sub-forums.

NeHi

[Joshie]

Originally Posted by FrontPorch

I was actually referring to all of the forums under the Homesteading Today umbrella in general.

I guess I don't know what you're talking about. I don't think it's rude or mean to disagree or to give your opinion. I think it's easy to confuse disagreement for rudeness. Part of the problem is that forums such as this are online and we cannot see each others' expressions.

[Janis Sauncy]

[QUOTE=Reptyledeleted insult removed)

Well, you just managed to prove the OP's point, didn't you?

[Reptyle]

[QUOTE=Janis Sauncy;4071750][QUOTE=Reptyledeleted insult removed)

Well, you just managed to prove the OP's point, didn't you? [/QUOTE]

Hardly. It was a fair question (mod opinion aside). If the OP is that aggrieved, then why stay and complain? As Chuck himself often points out this is the equivalent of his house...if you're at someone's house and don't like the atmosphere do you sit in the middle of the floor and complain, or do you leave?

Didn't take the mods long to delete...Gee, I wonder who called it to their attention?

[Prismseed]

I'm still a bit newb and don't know much. I've asked my share of questions and never been belittled. Also I've never personally seen another beginner's questions be belittled. Members often argue against each other, or condemn what they feel is inappropriate. Everyone has opinions and some folk don't sugarcoat what is on their mind.

Granted it also feels very tame here to me. In my wandering of the internet I have seen quite a few boards that have vulgarity and rudeness on a level that would make a sailor blush.

[Janis Sauncy]

Originally Posted by Reptyle

Didn't take the mods long to delete...Gee, I wonder who called it to their attention?

Not me!

[madness]

I know what the OP is talking about. A lot of posts towards newbies can be read as very rude. It really turned me off at first. But in reality, I think it's just people giving their honest opinion and they don't actually mean any harm. Now that I've been reading for several years, I don't notice it as much.

I see a lot of posts like: "You think you can do that?!? Wow, you've got a lot to learn!" Instead of reading it as rude (which it rightfully could be interpreted as such and is often done by new folks), think of it more as advice from someone who made the same mistake! The posts might come off as gruff, but I think the posters are being forward with their experiences - something you definitely want.

And some folks here are simply just matter-of-fact. No desire to soften their opinions or state things in an overly kind manner. Just curt and to the point. It's not necessarily rude, just a different way of communicating. You get to know the people that post this way and their comments no longer seem odd or rude, just normal for them!

On the other hand, there are occasional downright nasty things said here. Just like anywhere else. Just ignore those few comments and get back to the plethora of knowledge here!

I hope you aren't too turned off from the forum. Online communication has it's quirks and it can be hard to get used to. But it's well worth it!

[Gercarson]

My opinion of HomesteadingToday is familiarity - as in community. There are some of us who feel (probably) way too "at home" here. There are some of us who came here via the old Countryside forum. I have asked some very, very "stoopid" questions and have never gotten anything but respectful answers - I know that I may have "rankled" a few along the way - but only when I feel so adamant about an issue that I feel compelled to speak out. Then, the "ping pong" games begin - more often than not - the thread is "shut down" or sometimes deleted entirely. Sometimes you can get your wrists slapped or even banned.
If you are new here - you will soon feel "at home" - that is, unless you cannot face some (sometimes) a little raw reality - you will get every question answered and you can ask (almost) any question.
Now - WELCOME, please, make yourself at home and as else where on HomesteadingToday - "be nice" and you will be treated nice.

[Wisconsin Ann]

There are often rude posts in most of the forums here. sorry, but how often have you seen the Mods have to delete posts? hmm? We also see people jump on a bandwagon when a poster says something that someone thinks is stupid or just plain wrong. Quite often someone will misread the OP. Or they'll read it and go off on a tangent...and it gets downright rowdy....usually someone steps in and stops it.

Locked threads, deleted messages. temporary bans. and not from GC.

Yes, sometimes the OP is stirring the pot. Sometimes it's a simple question poorly put. Sometimes it's a question that has been answered a lot..and the poor newbie gets "Do a search. It's been answered a million times"...now..I consider that rude. How hard is it to say "we've discussed that in (and then show a few threads)"

This thread is showing to be one of them. The OP asked a simple question about why so many rude posts. And people jumped on him saying "if you don't like it, go elsewhere". It just sounds angry and exclusive.

This forum is MUCH more civil (other than GC) than most other open topic forums I've seen. I'm on quite a few single interest forums (woodworking, teardrop trailers, etc.) that are EXTREMELY nice...but they are all geared toward one topic. For some reason that makes it easier, I guess.

[AngieM2]

FrontPorch - the site is suppose to have one rule BE NICE. There are many interpretations of that little/massive rule.

In the upper right hand corner of each posts is an icon for Report a Post. If you see one that you think needs reviewing - click on the icon, give a reason why you think it needs reviewing, and it would be nice if you put the post # on it as the emailed link isn't all that easy to tell precisely which post you are talking about.

And over all - this is a homey place. There is the family that snips and such, but overall there are a bunch of OUTSTANDING people here.

Hang around, read a bit more, learn the personaliities to see if a 'rude' comment is just someone's brisk style of giving their info, or if they're having a bad day and taking it out on the forums, or if they are indeed a rude poster (there are a few). Usually the rudeness happens mostly between opposing fractions that 'know' each other here.

But as the rules all agreed to when they joined...

BE NICE, and let the mods do the modding. (even if you don't agree with any of us).

Angie
(and anyone can read the FAQ, it's at the top bar of the site index).

[Wisconsin Ann]

I think some of you missed the fact that Front Porch, even tho only 28 posts, has been a member since March 2008. Probably, if Front Porch is like most of us, he/she was a lurker before that.

[Oggie]

FrontPorch,

I don't know if you are aware of this, but some of the people who post on this board have cats. I guess that you have to cut them a little slack if they are dealing with that sort of evil in their household.

So, if someone seems a little rude. Just give them a little time. They'll cough up a hair ball or go play in their little sand box.

When they come back, they're usually a little more pleasant.

[themamahen]

Well I have gotten rude responses so much so my posts were closed! It happens and there are a FEW on here or WERE on here that never had NUTTIn nice to say everything that same outta their KB was mean. BUT..... the majority here 98% are and should be well loved neighbors (how i see em) and if u go out and do sumptin stupid... like ummm err.. try to close a red hot pot belly stove with your hand and in turn somehow get burned they might ummm tell u just how smart that was take all advice with a grain of salt and if someone ofends u ignore them pssttt..... they will go away.

Welcome to HT Im certainly glad your here

[seedspreader]

I think this is the stupidest post I've ever seen. No one is ever rude here. What's the OP thinking?






















[/remove tongue from cheek]