Amish Etiquette?

[dawncagle]

Oh, happy day!! The property that backs-up to ours was bought by an amish family! We were so worried that someone would buy it and turn it into a trailer park! And it gets better still, there are several other amish families looking at the remaining land (over 100 acres)! Okay, so this is my question...What is the appropriate way to introduce ourselves to our new neighbors and welcome them to the "neighborhood"? Is it okay to pop in with a cake or should I just let them be? I don't want to offend them but we are SOOO happy to have them!

[Pinnebog Kid]

All depends, where you located? are you sure their Amish? some orders of Mennonites look and seem the same as Amish. Also if Amish what order are they from? Old Order, Beachy, Swartzentruber, New Order, ??

[retire2$]

A neighbor is a neighbor. I would stop over and introduce myself. If you are willing, you could let them know that you will ge glad to answer any questions they may have of the area. After that I would let them make the next move. I would wave each time I went by and let it go at that.

[gone-a-milkin]

Honestly, just be yourself. The Amish are just people. They might appreciate it if everyone is fully clothed, no short-shorts or tanktops, but otherwise I would just take them a cake and say 'howdy neighbor!'

There is an Amish community near here and I remember feeling nervous about meeting them too. The novelty does wear off.

As with any new neighbors, I recommend being polite and friendly while also keeping most of your opinions to yourself, at first. It takes time to get to know new people.

[uncle Will in In.]

Do unto others as you would have them do to you. The cake would be nice. You'll find them to be like most people. They know the value of a dollar and do whatever they can to make a buck. One thing not to do, is volenteer to drive them somewhere. Many of them will ride a free horse to death. Be sure to let then know what you want to take them anywhere. After you get aquainted they will not seem strange. They are not all the same personality wise. <>UNK

[haypoint]

Each Amish person is an individual. Each Parish or community is different. While all Amish that I've met are close with their money, there are vast differences in financial situations.
You can depend on them being modest. They'll likely overlook your English ways, but why push it? They won't care what brand beer you drink, so you don't need to show up with your Bud Lite sweatshirt on. But don't buy a navy blue chore coat and cut your hair with a bowl either.
I've known some that go out of their way to insure a fair deal and I know some that will expect to ride to town in your truck every time it moves, just because you offered that service once.
The thought of someone jumping up and down while clapping their hands over their pre-judged idea that they know anything about their new neighbor worries me. Just treat them, with eyes wide open, like you would any other new neighbor.

It is unlikely that the land they bought will be converted to Condos, so the Amish reputation as farmers is a reasonable assumption. But I have seen many Amish move into communities and then move out a decade later.


For some it means you'll be able to buy farm fresh eggs. To others it just means you'll have to lock the tool crib.

[Tracy]

Originally Posted by uncle Will in In.

Do unto others as you would have them do to you. The cake would be nice. You'll find them to be like most people. They know the value of a dollar and do whatever they can to make a buck. One thing not to do, is volenteer to drive them somewhere. Many of them will ride a free horse to death. Be sure to let then know what you want to take them anywhere. After you get aquainted they will not seem strange. They are not all the same personality wise. <>UNK

True about the ride and also if you let them use your phone expect them to be over ALL the time using it. Belive me it gets old.

All in all I like my Amish neighbors but they will take advantage if you let them. We had to set specific time frames for phone usage that is how bad it got. We have a phone in our shop that they could use with out coming to the house but 6 am was a bit much getting all the dogs barking

[Micahn]

Where I grew up in Indiana we had a lot of Amish/Mennonites people around. I have always found as long as you treat them with respect they are great people. I would just go over there and say hi and just be a good neighbor. After you get to know them maybe even offer some help with things they have trouble with like phone calls and driving them places and such.
About 3 years ago when I was up in Indiana visiting some family we stopped by some Amish friends home. My wife and kids had never been around any and wanted to see what they was like. They invited us into their home and was very open with my kids about their life. I am sure it helped that they know some of us (My one uncle was with us and they know me from way back when) so they was very open about things.

They have a auction house close by and sell things from the farm as well some wonderful quilts.

[RVcook]

I guess I have a different take on being neighborly. To me, being neighborly means not being intrusive.

When we moved into our present home, not one of our neighbors came over and fussed over our presence. However, when we were out working in the yard, many who lived close to stopped by to say 'howdy.' They could see that we were busy so they didn't stay long...just long enough to introduce themselves, have a bit of small talk and on they went.

We are quite pleasant with our neighbors when we see them 1 1/2 years later, but really know very little about them personally. However, I am very glad that we have not become "best buds" either. There is an old adage...Familiarity breeds contempt...and when it comes to people you live in relatively close proximity to, I'm glad we're all on the same page.

RVcook

[Lavndrgrl]

I have to agree with Wind in Her Hair about it being worse.

In regards to offering service or phone usage I would wait on that until you see how they are. No one likes to feel taken advantage of. Of course we can only be taken advantage of if we allow it.

I would take the advice from these folks they sound like they know a good deal about their experiences. I am with you though that would give me at the very least somewhat of a peaceful feeling ,that they wont be like Wind was trying to express. Trust me I have had neighbors that were nightmares. When ever someone new moves into our neighborhood I always triy to be polite but to my husband in private I always say I hope this honeymoon stage last longer this time. It seems I have noticed a pattern with most renters or even home owners in our area at least. We unfortunatly live in a neighborhood consisting of 75X150 lots. We are not out on our land yet. 6 months will usually show a persons true colors. When someone starts to gossip I run for the hills. I believe in getting counsel but then their is just trashing another neighbor and believe me we have had some real nasty gossipers around here. Gotta pray for all our neighbors even ourselves.

Congrats though.

[ozark_jewels]

After living around Amish for years in Indiana, I can say that they are just like anyone else. Some are the salt of the earth, some are downright low.
Treat them just like you would anyone else. With respect and friendship, tempered with a hefty dose of caution till you get to know them.

[ozark_jewels]

Originally Posted by Wind in Her Hair

trashy-redneck-beer-guzzlin'-shoot-at-anything-that-moves-stereo-thumpin'-low-rider-cruisin'-thievin'-pit-bull-chained-up-in-the-back-of-the-truck-rape-the-land-burn-the garbage-pollute-the-water-put-up-bright-lighting-cut-all-the-trees-down-and-to-heck-with-consequences-and-authorities neighbors that some folks get. :

Careful there......if you leave out the "low-rider-cruisin'", "pit-bull-chained-up-in-the-back-of-the-truck" and "put-up-bright-lighting".........you could be exactly describing one Amish family that lived down the road from us. Yes, they even had the "stereo-thumpin'"......they just plugged it in at their absent neighbors barn where they did most of their drinking.

To the OP. Your neighbors will probably be great. But don't assume they will be just because they are Amish.

[Jennifer L.]

Originally Posted by Wind in Her Hair

ah come on, I'd be too to have Amish neighbors rather than the trashy-redneck-beer-guzzlin'-shoot-at-anything-that-moves-stereo-thumpin'-low-rider-cruisin'-thievin'-pit-bull-chained-up-in-the-back-of-the-truck-rape-the-land-burn-the garbage-pollute-the-water-put-up-bright-lighting-cut-all-the-trees-down-and-to-heck-with-consequences-and-authorities neighbors that some folks get. Or worse yet, the rabid litigious neighbor who'd haul you into court in a heartbeat and sue for damages if YOUR tree fell on HIS boundary...sheesh...

yeah, I'm thinking it could be a lot worse.

That description fits a lot of people from here on HT. Over the years we've all read the threads just like that on these forums, where someone says they moved to the country to do what they want, when they want and then proceed to do it. The ones who put up their shooting ranges and shoot all weekend long, etc. The ones who were thinking about suing a neighboring farmer for different reasons, like not getting their crop off fast enough on rental ground.

But I don't think there's anything magically wonderful about having the Amish next door, either. You're already talking about not wanting to offend them. That's insane. THEY are moving into YOUR neighborhood. Just for the record, they aren't going to be doing anything to accomodate you. They won't worry if they offend you, and they aren't going to be making sure their clothes are anything different if they come to your door wanting something.

The reality is they are a people with a screwy outlook on religion which everyone else thinks is "cute", but they are people just like anyone else who act just like anyone else and they have the same problems. They aren't "special".

Oh, and whenever they feel like the property values have gone up enough, they'll be out of your area and leave you with the higher property taxes like a plague of locusts and descend on someone else to do the same thing.

Personally, they are some of the last people I'd want to see move next door to my place. If it were an individual family it would be one thing, but they are a community that moves into your community, and they will effect you and your property.

So I'd be nice to them, but I sure wouldn't be looking at them as if they were any different for causing me problems than anyone else moving in. Would you take the cake to just anyone moving in? Then take them the cake.


Jennifer

[65284]

If they are like our large Amish community you won't be thrilled if you ever volunteer to give them a ride anywhere or allow them to use your phone. Do either just once and unless you are prepared to continue doing it you will amost certainly regret it. And yes, I know whereof I speak.

[haypoint]

There are several Amish groups in Michigan. Soon there will be another Quilt Auction near Mt. Pleasant. They have one twice a year.The group near Stanwood is moving to norther MN, cheaper land. The group near Gladwin are very poor and struggle. I know one Amish family that does custom butchering for chickens. They charge $1.25 per bird. Kill, pluck, gut and put in a zip lock bag. Hard way to make the mortgage.The group near Clare doesn't get along with the group near Rosebush. Many operate sawmills. I heard a group was moving to the U.P., near Engadine, but not sure. Generally, if they can't grow corn, they won't settle.

While Amish neighbors might be a lot beter than some white trash or a land developer, having the noise of a sawmill and the heavy trucks up and down your road might not fit with your Grandpa Walton image either.

[big rockpile]

The Amish here drive cars and have Electric.The Mennoites don't but if they ever ask me to take them to town they pay me well.

My only complaint is if you go to sell produce off your place or open a business forget it if they are in the area.

big rockpile

[deb]

Originally Posted by dawncagle

Oh, happy day!! The property that backs-up to ours was bought by an amish family! We were so worried that someone would buy it and turn it into a trailer park! And it gets better still, there are several other amish families looking at the remaining land (over 100 acres)! Okay, so this is my question...What is the appropriate way to introduce ourselves to our new neighbors and welcome them to the "neighborhood"? Is it okay to pop in with a cake or should I just let them be? I don't want to offend them but we are SOOO happy to have them!

We live in an Old Order Amish community and have no bad stories to tell about them. (I can tell you many bad stories about our non-Amish neighbors). Some Amish are very friendly from the get-go and others are more reserved, but with time they have become friendly to us.

Stop and introduce yourself to your new neighbors sometime when they are working in the yard or bring them a cake if you've got the time and inclination to make one. If they are really new to the area, the giving them information about your location would probably be most welcome.

We just had an Amish family from another area move in a rental house down the street. They had an "eggs for sale" sign up today so I stopped to buy a dozen. I was asked into their house, paid for the eggs and ended up chatting with the wife for almost an hour. We talked about their move, the coming snow (she didn't know about it), distances to the little towns near us and best places to shop. While talking about gardening mentioned that I wanted to learn to can this year and she offered to teach me.

Is this unusual? Perhaps a little, but I find that I have a lot more in common and have an easier time talking with my Amish neighbors than my "English" neighbors. I've had a few small favors asked of me by my Amish neighbors which were easy to do considering I have a car and they have helped me with some things that are easy to do with a horse.

Edited to add about produce:
The Amish started a weekly Produce Auction here and anyone can consign their produce at the auction. The auction brings in a lot of buyers from stores and institutions (hospitals) looking to "buy local" and "fresh". The Produce Auction allows farmers to reach a much bigger market and they get premium prices for their best produce without having to drive 50 miles to a city.

Yes, we also have a lot of roadside stands selling produce (Amish & not), but having the Amish live here brings in many, many tourists and the tourists buy tons of fresh produce from the stands. I should also note that the tourists also spend money in the nearby little towns so even the townies make money from being near an Amish community.
Hope this helps
Deb
in wi

[PhilJohnson]

I've worked around, worked with, and worked for Amish. For the most part I find most of them to be good people. There are some bad characters out there but from my dealings with them they don't act too much different than anyone else. I hold Amish to the same standards as anyone else. There are a few stereotypical quirks like using the phone, getting rides, and the speaking in PA dutch about you when they think you don't understand them in front of you (I know just enough of their language to be dangerous ). Not all of them do the previously mentioned items but it does seem more often than not they'll engage in at least one of those things.

[ladycat]

Originally Posted by Wind in Her Hair

ah come on, I'd be too to have Amish neighbors rather than the trashy-redneck-beer-guzzlin'-shoot-at-anything-that-moves-stereo-thumpin'-low-rider-cruisin'-thievin'-pit-bull-chained-up-in-the-back-of-the-truck-rape-the-land-burn-the garbage-pollute-the-water-put-up-bright-lighting-cut-all-the-trees-down-and-to-heck-with-consequences-and-authorities neighbors that some folks get. Or worse yet, the rabid litigious neighbor who'd haul you into court in a heartbeat and sue for damages if YOUR tree fell on HIS boundary...sheesh...

yeah, I'm thinking it could be a lot worse.

I would also be excited about getting Amish or Mennonite neighbors.

And you just described half the people living around me.

[Tricky Grama]

I have to agree w/WIHH. (Mainly b/c I always do ) Just like to add: how'd ya like a developer who thinks homes on 1/2 ac would be dandy??
We had 20+ ac behind us for sale & were thinking of getting the 3 of us together who own land backing up to that 20 ac, and buying it...to keep it from being developed. In the meantime a family w/9 horses moved in-PERFECT!

Patty