Fuel costs to cut neighbor's wood

Cutting wood for disabled neighbor.........

DH has spent many, many hours cutting wood for the disabled (stroke) neighbor for several years.
He and his wife re-pay with lots of garden produce.
That payment has been satisfactory but beigining last year DH has begun to gripe about the cost of fuel for the chainsaw.

I think DH should still "barter" his labor in exchange for the garden produce, but this year I think he should ask for reimbursement for the fuel costs.

DH 'thinks' the neighbor will realize how expensive fuel is and 'offer' some cash. (It didn't happen that way last year.)
Until that happens he will not say anything to the neighbor but will continue to grumble to me.

We are not hard up for money and neither is the neighbor.
We could ignore the fuel cost and not be hurt EXCEPT for the grumbling I will need to put up with.

I could easily mention the fuel costs to the neighbors and ask them to have some fuel on hand.
I am positive this will not cause any discontent from them and the neighbors will be happy to help out.

The question------
Do I not say anything and deal with DH's rants?

Or----do I mention it to the neighbors and have DH annoyed with me for a brief time-----but happy to use their gas for cutting their wood?

[hiswife]

make it clear to your DH that either he says something to the neighbor, or he shuts up about it.

[wr]

I'd hate to see a rift between two good neighbors because of a bit of fuel. You might still be even, under the old terms. Because of the higher fuel costs, transport costs have increased the price of produce considerably so if you were buying what you're being given, you would certainly be paying more. While your husband is only seeing his increased fuel costs, he isn't realizing the increased value of produce. Unless the neighbors are digging their garden by hand, may have some additional fuel costs too if they happen to be using a gas tiller. You may also mention to him that doing something nice for somebody who needs a bit of help is a generous thing to do but not always something we do for compensation and good deeds have a way of comming back around.

[Windy in Kansas]

I try to look at both sides to any issue.

While we all readily acknowledge that gasoline costs have skyrocketed you might also take into consideration that you are bartering.

The cost of seeds, energy to pump water, energy to roto-till, fertilizer, insecticides, etc. have all gone up as well. Maybe not at the same rate of gasoline but compare store produce prices of a couple of years ago to those seen in the produce aisle currently.

If you don't consider the barter to be an equal basis can you simply count it as helping friends or helping neighbors plus an attempt on their part to be fair?

[diane]

I agree that hubby most likely has not considered what the produce would cost if you bought it. You might help him see it by pricing out the produce at the super market and show him the value received. I also think that doing something to help someone out and then grumbling about the cost of it is missing the blessing. If it is all about the barter, than see if he has a gripe and suggest that he take it up with the neighbor. On the other hand, you could just turn your ear away from the grumbling, suck it up and consider it your good deed.

[homesteadforty]

How much fuel does his chainsaw use... I cut several cords on a couple gallons. Even at $4.00 per gallon the actual fuel cost is negligible.

Sounds to me that DH just don't want to cut it any more. Either that or he just wants to grumble.

Either way I agree with hiswife... either cut it and shut up, or ask for reimbursement for fuel and shut up, or just say I don't want to do it anymore and shut up. This is totally within his control... why is he grumbling to you about it???

[wyld thang]

can I say it seems your dh is getting nit-picky? dont' know the amounts of product involved, but once you start down the road of being completely fair and tit for tat it never works out. Cutting wood for a disabled neighbor is best done out of the goodness of your heart, not making sure you get exactly fairly compensated--if he wants that then he needs to charge real money and wages and run it like a business.

sorry, getting stingy is bad karma. yeah, if your neghbor has to pay for gas it's only fair your hub should pay for the energy to pump and apply water and gas to go to town to buy the plants/seeds and fertilizer. Fair?

[goatlady]

You might want to remind your DH that the neighbors cannot read his mind! He needs to say something or shut up as previously stated.

DH is really a good, big hearted person and wants to help the neighbor.

He's always been a very hard worker and generous person.

I think he probably doesn't even realize the contradiction of his comments to me about the chainsaw gas.
I will try to enlighten him.

Thank you for your comments.

[ladycat]

Originally Posted by diane

I also think that doing something to help someone out and then grumbling about the cost of it is missing the blessing.

The Lord loves a cheerful giver.

[homesteadforty]

Originally Posted by GrammaV

DH is really a good, big hearted person and wants to help the neighbor.

He's always been a very hard worker and generous person.

I think he probably doesn't even realize the contradiction...

GrammaV... I didn't doubt that or he wouldn't have taken on the task to begin with. It just that being a guy, I know that sometimes some guys (that would not include me ) get a little bug stuck somewhere and somebody has to set our... errr their thinking straight. :banana02:

[rambler]

hiswife & homsteadforty have some very wise comments, as well as others too.

The time lost doing this, instead of his other projects, likely are the big grumble, but it comes out as wasted gas price.... Anyhow, this guy could easily express things in that way.....

--->Paul

[Missy M]

Take your DH grocery shoping and have him pick out the produce. When he realizes how much it now costs he may feel your getting a great deal.