08/30/07, 10:43 AM
|
|
|
|
Join Date: May 2007
Location: n. arkansas
Posts: 561
|
|
|
Anywhere, USA lol
A tribute to our miserable summer! lol
May 30th:
Just got moved into our new home in Anywhere, USA. Now this is a
city that knows how to live!! Beautiful sunny days and warm balmy
evenings. What a place! I watched the sunset from a park lying on a
blanket. It was beautiful. I've finally found my home. I love it here.
June 14th:
Really heating up. Got to 95 today. Not a problem. Live in an
air-conditioned home, drive an air-conditioned car. What a
pleasure to see the sun everyday like this. I'm turning into a sun
worshiper.
June 30th:
Had the backyard landscaped with western plants today. Lots of
cactus and rocks. What a breeze to maintain. No more mowing lawn
for me. Another scorcher today, but I love it here.
July 10th:
The temperature hasn't been below 98 all week. How do people get
used to this kind of heat? At least it's kind of windy though.
But getting used to the heat and humidity is taking longer that I expected.
July 15th:
Fell asleep by the pool. (Got 3rd degree burns over 60% of my
body). Missed 3 days of work. What a dumb thing to do. I learned
my lesson though. Got to respect the ol' sun in a climate like this.
July 20th:
I missed Kitty (our cat) sneaking into the car when I left this
morning. By the time I got to the hot car for lunch, Kitty had
died and swollen up to the size of a shopping bag and stank up the $2,000 leather
upholstery. I told the kids that she ran away. The car now smells like Kibbles and
bits. I learned my lesson though. No more pets in this heat.
July 25th:
The wind sucks. It feels like a giant blow dryer!! And
it's hot. The home air-conditioner is on the fritz and
the AC repairman charged $200 just to drive by and tell me he needed to order parts.
July 30th:
Been sleeping outside by the pool for 3 nights now. $1,500 in house payments and we can't even go inside. Why did I ever come here?
Aug. 4th:
It's 103 degrees. Finally got the air-conditioner fixed today. It
cost $500 and gets the temperature down to 85, but this
humidity makes the house feel like it's about 95. Stupid repairman. I hate this
stupid city.
Aug. 8th:
If anyone else cracks, "Hot enough for you today?" I'm going
to strangle him. By the time I get to work the
radiator is boiling over, my clothes are soaking wet, and I smell like
baked cat!!
Aug. 9th:
Tried to run some errands after work. Wore shorts, and sat on the
black leather seats in the ol' car. I thought my behind was on
fire. I lost 2 layers of flesh and all the hair on the back of my legs. Now my car smells like burnt hair and baked cat.
Aug. 10th:
The weather report might as well be a recording. Hot and
sunny. Hot and sunny. Hot and sunny. It's been too hot to do
anything for 2 months and the weatherman says it might really warm up next
week. Doesn't it ever rain in this desert? Water rationing will be next, so my
$1700 worth of cactus just might dry up and blow into the pool. Even the cactus
can't live in this heat.
Aug. 14th:
Temperature got to 105 today. Forgot to crack
the window and blew the windshield out of the car. The
installer came to fix it and said, "Hot enough for you today?" My wife had to spend
the $1500 house payment to bail me out of jail.
|
