For you Ladies who spoil your husbands

All country · #1 04/28/07, 08:08 PM

For you Ladies who spoil your husbands....Thank You!

I was reading MOOPUPS post today and your reminders came to me at a perfect time.

For months now, I have slipped into the "what about me??????? mode"
I don't believe that it is any coincidence that I have also been miserable.

For years, I fixed my husbands plates, right down to buttering and seasoning his baked potato for him. I would fix his breakfast and a glass of chocolate milk for him each morning.

I am not sure exactly when it started, but I decided he was taking me for granted. Possibly too many voices telling me that he was taking advantage of me? I hear it all the time from "helpful" people.

For almost the same time, I have begun having serious doubts about even being married because I have been so unhappy. This has been very confusing for me. My husband is a fine man. I love him, and he loves me. He is devoted to me, our marriage, and our family. He is faithful, loving and kind. He works hard to take care of our family and to make it so that I can stay home full time. Why was I so unhappy?

This morning he got up, went to the kitchen and fixed himself some pop tarts and a glass of milk. He didn't even ask me what's for breakfast. As he was doing this I realized that he had mentioned his shoulder has been hurting him for several days now, and I had never even offered to rub it for him.

I'm not sure where it came from, but when he walked into the room, I was close to tears, I blurted out "I miss doing that for you"! I realized that deep within me, without my even realizing it, I did miss spoiling him. I missed fixing his plates, fixing his potatoes special just for him, sitting on the sofa and rubbing his back, massaging away his aches after a hard day at work. My spoiling him was my way of thanking him for all the sacrifices he makes for our family. It let him know each and every day that I am glad he's "My Man."

Yesterday, I fixed his plate for him. I had sat it at my place and hadn't yet moved it to his spot. When I called him in for lunch, I noticed as he walked into the kitchen, that sad little look that crossed his face as he glanced at my spot and went to grab a plate for fix for himself. I also noticed the look of pleasure that came over him when I said "Honey, sit down, I fixed this plate for you". Funny how such a small act on my part could mean so much to him.

When he gets home from work this evening, he will find a fresh slice of homemade pumpkin pie and glass of milk waiting for him. After he is done with that, I will be ready to give him the full back massage he deserves. I think it's high time I make a little more effort to remind my man that I am glad he's king of this castle.

The funny thing is, the more I do to let him know how glad I am that he King of my castle, the more he does to let me know how glad he is that I'm his queen.

big rockpile · #2 04/28/07, 08:19 PM

Yea I like spoiling my DW

big rockpile

RachAnn in NW Okla · #3 04/28/07, 08:19 PM

that is very touching......and then I woke up....

I would love to be that type of wife.....beable to stay home and take care of our house....but I have a career that I love nearly as much....

we both work full time and have 2 small children....we BOTH make sacrifices for the other....

but the thing about making his plate up at meals.....well, I make the 2yo's plate, then the 5yo's plate, occasionally I make DH's after but he usually is just sitting and watching me make the kids' so I just give him his plate.....then he waits on me to make my plate

I guess it works for you but for us I have other little ways of saying "I love you"

Rachel

dashley · #4 04/28/07, 08:26 PM

I enjoy doing thing's for my husband too........... But I am also glad he enjoy's doing things for me. When I am sick, he takes care of me. Before he retired one day I had a really bad migraine, he left work early to come home and take care of me. He is a GOOD HUSBAND!!

dashley · #5 04/28/07, 08:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by big rockpile

Yea I like spoiling my DW

big rockpile

roflmao

rock, you are too funny!!

travlnusa · #6 04/28/07, 08:29 PM

It's a snowball effect in our house. The more she does for me, the more I want to do for her, thus the more she wants to do for me, etc.

Of course we have trainwrecks time to time, but they are very short lived compared to the old days.

It works for us.

Lucy · #7 04/28/07, 08:31 PM

Thanks for sharing, All country and Rose.
Mine is spoiled, too. He spoils me,too. It makes for a happy marriage here.

Jenn · #8 04/28/07, 08:35 PM

(I peeked- noone said ONLY for you ladies who spoil your husbands...)

Jen H · #9 04/28/07, 08:55 PM

I guess Husband and I spoil each other. Sometimes he'll make dinner out of the blue. I make sure I bring home the wine he likes. He gets his back rubbed and I get my feet rubbed.

We have our snarky moments, but on the whole we treat each other well and it works.

TC · #10 04/28/07, 09:12 PM

I have a great husband, i'm very lucky. I make his plate, butter his bread etc. even if we are sitting at the table and it's all right there. I'll massage his back when he's aching. I help as much as I can when we are working in the field, even if alot of it is beyond my strength level.

In return, he works very hard and many overtime hours, so I can stay at home.....I think of that as my "spoiling". I love him very much.

Callieslamb · #11 04/28/07, 09:15 PM

Mine is so spoiled he is beginning to smell. But then, I smell pretty ripe too ..... it is great!

stef · #12 04/28/07, 10:47 PM

It's good to read your stories. I know some extraordinarily happy married couples. To one degree or another they've made Jesus Christ the Head of their home. Their 'secrect' is just what you've shared: mutual love and service. A happy marriage is a blessing not just to their own household but a great influence in their 'sphere of influence'. Thanks for sharing!
Stef

MicheleMomof4 · #13 04/28/07, 11:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Stef

It's good to read your stories. I know some extraordinarily happy married couples. To one degree or another they've made Jesus Christ the Head of their home. Their 'secrect' is just what you've shared: mutual love and service. A happy marriage is a blessing not just to their own household but a great influence in their 'sphere of influence'. Thanks for sharing!
Stef

Amen Stef.

All Country, your post inspired me to keep thinking about how to be a better wife. My DH will tell anyone he is spoiled, but sometimes I get caught up in *stuff* and forget to make him #1. Your post was a good reminder. Thank you!

God Bless,
Michele

homemom1fl · #14 04/28/07, 11:04 PM

All Country, I'm with ya! My dh took me out to dinner the other day and I had been thinking about how for the last couple of years I stopped fixing his plate at family get togethers and I was really sad about it. I told him that I was sorry that I had stopped that and told him that I liked doing it and would start again. I have no idea why I stopped. It's funny that the more I do for my dh, the more overwhelmed I am with love for him. A lot of people would think we were wrong or weird or something for doing things like that for our dh, it is nice to hear that I am not alone in getting more enjoyment out of that than just about anything. I have a GREAT husband whom I have been married to for 20 years now.

thechickenladyx · #15 04/28/07, 11:14 PM

i envy you guys.

the more i do for my hub, the more he expects. return never happens. we're down to his sitting on the couch. thats it.

i work, he sits. it do housework, he sits. i shop, he sits.......

yea it's fun.

jesse

MicheleMomof4 · #16 04/28/07, 11:30 PM

((((((((Jesse))))))))
Prayer's for you and your hubby.

God Bless,
Michele

simplefarmgirl · #17 04/29/07, 06:35 AM

My husband is spoiled also, I do everything for him,in return I get to stay home and work our farm, he does things that most people wouldnt notice, only me and thats what matters, I feel left out when he come in and fixes something for himself,, and all he says you were busy doing something you wanted to do,, My husband is king of our farm,,he is my best friend in the world, and i am his

chickenista · #18 04/29/07, 06:54 AM

I must say that I am jealous. I would love to spoil my DH, but can't. He was a bachelor for so long that such things make him uncomfortable. The touching or cuddling, the backrubs...not much of a conversationalist either. I would love it if he could get a backrub and purr about it. So, like you chickenlady, we sit. Him in his chair, me in mine. If I do something nice for him or cook his favorite foods that I like only marginally, all I get is his guilt. "I feel bad that you did this for me" Sigh. We are a mess, but we parent well as a team. I think we are both lonely. So love 'em ladies if you have a sweet man who loves you. Little tears..we had a fight this am.

ginnie5 · #19 04/29/07, 07:11 AM

chickenista and Jesse, I'll be praying for both of you and your dh's. Dh and I were discussing this thread last night. then we got to talking about a couple we now that is having problems......and we both think that they are in need of some spoiling.

Loriann1971 · #20 04/29/07, 07:43 AM

When DH was in the Air Force, I would get up at 5:30 each morning to make sure his uniform was perfect and ready to go. One morning we had an unexpected frost, so while he was in the shower, I went out and scraped the windows on his car. My next door neighbor on base was taking her dog out and said, "Don't let my DH see you doing that. I don't want him to expect me to do that every mornning!"

She also thought I was crazy for getting up early to get his uniform laid out for him. On the other side of the coin though, she told me she was quite jealous everytime she looked over and saw DH doing the dinner dishes or saw the florist delivering flowers to the house. She never got the connection between my actions and his.