How to convince someone to have surgery

Perhaps she could suck on hard candies?

She has been treated for depression for about 20 years now, to the point of having EST and just about every drug known to treat it. She will go for months and be fine and then wake up one day and be in the depths of depression again. Just sadly the depression is in its depths right now and the surgeon feels the surgery needs done soon.

She has had this hiatial hernia for about 6-7 years and the surgeon said it has become very bad, one of the worst he has ever seen and also said part of her small intestine is coming through the muscle wall also.

She has had a few surgeries in the last few years for broken bones and always did very well, but she was in an up period of the depression at the time.

With the pain she is in and the refusing to eat it is hard on her and the family as well.

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I second what Quivrflmidwife said about the Reglan. Prilosec is a much better drug for GERD. Also, in my work with the elderly, in about 3 out of 10 patients I can hear bowel sounds up in the chest when I am listening for lung sounds. Many of these patients are also diagnosed with atypical angina and they don't get relief from nitro- amazing how many "heart attacks" and "angina" cases we have cured with a little prilosec. I have even had doctors decide that they are hearing lung sounds with very active hiatal hernias and institute all kinds of respiratory interventions. And, of course, the CXR will show "no acute pathology".
In the state of Florid no doctor will talk to afamily member unless the patient insists on it during the visit. Hippa and privacy rights, you know.

I know she has taken Prilosec, but I don't think it helped. I think the surgeon said it is twisted or something. My Mom can hear the medical stuff as she has medical power of attorney I think, but she does not want to sign for the surgery without Grandma's consent.

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Double check with a lawyer, but I don't think the medical power of attorney is any use unless granma is not capable of making a decision. As in coma, etc.

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"No great thing is created suddenly." ~Epictitus

I believe this is true as well. The only way she (your mother) can actually make medical decisions is to actually take her (your grandmother) to court to have your grandmothers rights actually taken away, this is a long process by the way. My husbands family did take away his grandmothers right but it was a very long legal process with many court proceedings. Just being her medical power of attorney means nothing if she is awake and talking.

My m-i-l is 90 and recently was hospitalized for pneumonia. She nearly died and was so sick and confused she had no idea where she was or what was happening. My dh is her medical POA and followed her wishes i.e. medical treatment but no CPR if she coded. M-i-l made the decision when she was in her 70's that she did not want surgery for a broken hip which is why she ended up in the nursing home. She made some other decisions that we didn't agree with, but accepted because she had the right to make them. She's also suffered from depression off and on all the 50 years I've known her.

When my dad decided he'd had enough of the hospital and asked for all life support to be removed, we all respected his wishes. It was hard, it was sad, but it was a matter of respecting his right to decide his own fate.

Your grandmother has the right to make her own decision unless her doctor says she's not competent to do so. Painful as it is the only thing you can do is respect her wishes and pray that she'll change her mind.

Doing nothing is often the hardest thing we are faced with especially when you know this surgery is the best thing. I pray that your uncle and mother will have the right words to convince their mother and that your grandmother's depression will allow her to hear and for all acceptance of the decision.

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